Shouty man

‘Corporal punishment should be reinstated’ – people against Sharia law

A recent survey of lobotomised knuckle dragging fuck nuggets revealed that they are fighting against the values that they themselves hold most dear. We caught up with one of the  participants, Baz 'Smiff', a UKIP...

Dalai Lama fury over Louis Smith Buddha is a fat bastard comments

The Dalai Lama is said to be incandescently furious with Louis Smith after he was overheard calling Buddha a "fat fucker". Two time Olympic Pommel Horse runner up, Strictly Come Dancing winner and sore loser...

Archbishop Suspended By Labour Over Historically Discredited Old Testament

Labour have suspended Justin Welby, the Archbishop of Canterbury. In an enquiry it was claimed that the Archbishop, 53, had been reported to the Labour party after quoting discredited historians and distributing anti-Semitic literature. Speaking to...
Parents

Man in a frock told us boys shouldn’t wear dresses, say parents suing school...

The parents of a child who saw another boy in a dress at school are suing the school because a man in a frock said boys can't wear dresses. The man in the frock apparently...
Mike Pence

US replaces health insurance with crossed fingers, hoping and prayer

There has been a wave of concern regarding universal access to healthcare across the United States after Donald Trump, Mike Pence and the GOP officially repealed Obamacare this week. "We have hereditary birth defects in my family, and...
Bleeding figure of Christ

PC BBC bans ‘graphically violent’ crucifixion depictions for Easter

In a controversial move, the BBC has announced it will be 'normalising' it's guidelines for showing scenes of violence, by banning all images of the crucifixion. This will not be a new policy, it says,...
God

Man looking for God admits he would be easier to find if he knew...

A Rochdale man has today admitted that it would have been much easier to find God had he known what God looks like. Garry Bennett began his search 10 years ago after meeting a successful entrepreneur at...
Black Jesus

Black Jesus denies rumours he is bowling hurricanes at Mar a lago

Speaking from his home near Cape Verde, Black Jesus denied that his decision to spend time exploring his roots in West Africa has had anything to do with the recent uptick in hurricane prevalence. “Sure,...

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