Tories to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals
The Tory Party has today promised to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals.
Tory manifesto spokesman, Bill Board told us, "We've done our research...
Labour to campaign for Liberal Democrats in June 8th General Election
Diane Abbott was resurrected this afternoon to speak to a journalist of sorts, on the BBC.
Ms Abbott used one of her last possible...
It’s not a popularity contest, really unpopular MP tells voters
An extremely unpopular MP has just informed voters that the upcoming general election is not a popularity contest.
The MP addressed the crowd and urged...
Firefighters called to Downing St after woman stuck in windows retrieving solid policy document
Reports this morning out of Downing Street say firefighters were called last night after a woman became stuck between two windows attempting to retrieve...
English All Xenophobic Wankers – says Nicola Sturgeon without Hint of Irony
Nicola Sturgeon will today claim that “Godless English Imperial filth” are using Brexit as a “licence for xenophobia” and that the English “are secretly working to not be considered Wankers by absolutely everyone.”
Trump Announces New Cabinet Appointments
Two new appointments have been made to the cabinet of President-Elect Donald Trump.
"Although I know that I will be technically the Commander-In-Chief, people will...
Beleavers still think they’re in with a chance of another Referendum
Since June 23 Brexiters led by an enraged Nigel Farage haven't stopped moaning about the majority vote for Britain to remain in EU.
"I don't...
Paul Nuttall denies lying about surviving the sinking of the Titanic
UKIP leader and MEP Paul Nuttall Sunday issued a stern denial that he had lied about surviving the sinking of the Titanic on April...
May: Difference between migrants and refugees is we don’t want either
Theresa May has said that refugees should settle in the first safe country they come to, rather than travel through several countries, and has...
Theresa May announces “peace in our time” following historic call with President Trump
Theresa May has finally been able to speak to President-elect Donald Trump after 24 hours on hold listening to elevator music.
Cameron cronies cry nonsense at cries of Conservative cronyism
Friends of David Cameron have sprung to his defence today after accusations that his Exit Honours list is an example of cronyism.
"Clearly this is...
Ed Miliband Suspended by Labour in Anti-Semitic Bacon Sandwich Shocker
Former Labour Leader Ed Miliband has been suspended from the Party after being accused of anti-Semitic breakfast habits. A spokesman for the Labour Party...
Michael Gove is handsome and intelligent according to new YouGove poll.
A new poll by Britain's newest survey company has revealed that Michael Gove is both handsome and intelligent.
The new company, YouGove, polls members of...
Doctors find hating immigrants can increase risk of getting Nuttalls
Recent medical studies have found a direct link between xenophobic thoughts and the rampant outbreak of Nuttalls in the U.K.
Closely resembling a haemorrhoid, a...
New Far Right Perfume Released.
In order to capitalise on the mood of the country at the moment, the ex-UKIP leader Nigel Farage is to release a new perfume...
Theresa May’s plot to run the country foiled by Theresa May
Theresa May will face a cross party parliamentary committee this week, after it was revealed she foiled her own plot to successfully run the...
