Make America Great Again

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We keep hearing Donald saying he's going to make America great again, sounds good to us but we were curious to find out when...

Government to encourage more online petitions. 

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Prime Minister Theresa May has today launched a new initiative which will encourage people concerned with issues affecting them, their communities and the country...

Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters

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Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University’s Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...

Conservatives horrified at ‘meagre’ income of BBC presenters

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On Wednesday in was revealed to the public how much some of our favourite BBC Presenters earn, as well as some rubbish ones too. The...

Yeah, well I didn’t want an election anyway, so ner, huffs ridiculous man child

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The degradation of formerly Great Britain continued this week, with the news that Boris Johnson has again failed in his attempt to call a...

Wales Seeks Independence as Gareth Bale Doubles Welsh GDP

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Carwyn Jones has changed his mind on Welsh Independence after Gareth Bale’s new contract doubled the GDP of Wales.
Interrogation

Beatings will continue until morale improves says Tory Chief Whip

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Tory Chief Whip, Francis Gavin Urquhart Williamson, has advised the parliamentary Conservative party during a closed meeting that the beatings will continue until morale...
Beach

Government votes to go on holiday early after solving all UK’s problems

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Members of parliament have overwhelmingly voted to bring their summer break forward as a reward for having solved all of the UK's problems. The...

This is your eighty seventh and FINAL warning Corbyn tells Labour MPs

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After 52 of Jeremy Coalbin's unruly red rabble voted against the party whip over the Article 50 vote in parliament, the Labour leader has...

Grenfell Tower survivors offer Michael Gove their last five pounds to bugger off

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Survivors of the Grenfell Tower disaster suffered a further shock last night when esteemed Tory minister Michael Gove was spotted in the vicinity. It's believed...
Donald Trump

Our concentration camps are safer than our schools, Trump assures Democrats

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Donald Trump has taken to Twitter today to assure Democrats in the United States Congress that the filthy concentration camps into which he's herding...

OJ Simpson appointed White House press secretary

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Tongues are wagging in Washington today over what seems too convenient for coincidence as OJ Simpson is rumoured about to be appointed as Sean...

Theresa May says alcohol and poor judgement to blame for Trump state visit

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Theresa May has been responding to calls to cancel the Trump state visit during a press conference today. Responding to criticism that the invitation for...
Boris Johnson

Asda Self-service checkout till beats Boris Johnson at Scrabble

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Scientists from Rochdale College have developed an artificially intelligent self service till that beat Boris Johnson at Scrabble.  Dr Frederick Seddon said, "We were wanting...
Theresa May (licence)

Brexit date to be celebrated by New ‘May Day’ Bank Holiday.

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It has been announced that as of 2019, the 29th of March will become known as 'May Day' in recognition of the glorious achievements...

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