Boris Johnson Sits In With Infant School Maths Class, Answers 350 Million To Every...
Boris Johnson seems to have a one-track mind when it comes to numbers. While visiting an infants' school in Rochdale, he sat in on...
Sacha Baron-Cohen amazed no one has seen through his Jeremy Corbyn character
Sacha Baron-Cohen has expressed amazement that no one has twigged that he is the man behind the character 'Jeremy Corbyn'.
"I wanted to play with...
G20 Crisis as Trump eats hot dogs in Hamburg.
President Donald Trump caused outrage in Hamburg, Germany today, eating hot dogs and apple pie and drinking root beer all flown in with him...
David Davis chosen as Westminster village idiot from competitive field
Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union, David Davis, has been chosen to hold the esteemed job of Westminster Village Idiot, beating off...
Woman always repeating “no meal is better than a bad meal” now dining alone
A woman who keeps saying “no meal is better than a bad meal” to the people she’s supposed to have dinner with dined alone...
Million chimps on typewriters still haven’t come up with Brexit plan
In an undisclosed location somewhere in an underground catacomb deep under Westminster, project Megachimp has been underway for several months now. It's aim; to...
I have no idea what’s going on, says Will of the People
The infamous Will of the People has finally been outed by Rochdale Herald researchers. His real name is Will Fallfrit, and he has opened...
Theresa May says Britain and Europe should come together as if in some sort...
Theresa May has been further outlining her vision for Brexit.
The Prime Minister was speaking to journalists on her way home from Florence. She told...
Actor playing Donald Trump forgets stage directions
Due to White House budget cuts, an experienced but cheap actor was selected for the part. Bit part "character actor" Rowle Player is best...
British automakers to make english sparkling wine for export to Japan after Brexit
Boris Johnson, acting Prime Minister, has followed up Theresa May’s success in Japan by reassuring Japanese business lobbies British automakers can produce enough english...
Theresa May refuses to attend the General Election
After appointing her recently bereaved Home Secretary, Amber Rudd, to take
flack from 'the most left wing audience since a Stalin rally' - Daily Mail,
in...
Relief as far-right mob turns out to be burst bag of pork scratchings
Police have attended an incident in Rochdale today after numerous concerned calls reported a far-right mob assembled in the town centre.
Attending officers would like...
Alex Jones discusses the Trump presidency
Good evening. Today I am speaking to Radio host and Bacofoil and batshit salesman, Alex Jones.
Good afternoon, Alex. How are you feeling after Trump's rather...
Soon to be estranged husband proposes ‘transitional sexual union’
Under the suggested terms of the deal, Britton, 34, would remain in the family home for up to a further two years, and would be entitled to avail himself of all the sexual benefits associated with a normal marriage.
Boris tweets ‘I’m safe’ after car crash interview
Britain's comedy foreign secretary, Boris “The Bewildered” Johnson, is lucky to be alive and well, tweeting “I’m safe!” just moments after his disastrous interview...
Tommy Robinson claims free Milkshake during Warrington Campaign
Pint sized, shouty, hater of brown people, Steven Yaxley-Lennon, better known by one of his dozen names 'Tommy Robinson' presumably to sound more British...
