British Gas CEO insists he’s only rubbing his hands together to keep warm
The CEO of British Gas, Sir Mork Lodges, has advised today he’s only rubbing his hands together to keep warm.
The statement comes on the...
Halcyon Days Here to Stay
Alexander Boris de Pfeffle Johnson won't even be declared as head of the Tory Party until the needless sham of a leadership election is...
One in the eye for Tories as Rudd loses Hastings seat
Amber Rudd tonight accepted a role as full-time spokesperson for Theresa May. The Herald asked Amber what caused her seat to turn Red, and she...
Amber Rudd announces plan to ban envelopes
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has announced that envelopes will be banned from the end of the month.
The Home Office has also announced that all...
Clinton Email Cache Found in Historic Exeter Hotel
The American election process was thrown into confusion yesterday when the FBI moved into the Royal Clarence Hotel, Exeter, in search of a hidden...
Football players saving us all by not taking a pay cut
The Professional Footballers Association have warned that a 30% cut in their members' wages would damage the NHS as it would reduce the amount...
Corbyn goes 39 under par beats Kim Jong il’s record
Jeremy Corbyn has announced his decision to retire from Golf after taking it up yesterday and shooting a record breaking 39 under par at...
Theresa May says Britain and Europe should come together as if in some sort...
Theresa May has been further outlining her vision for Brexit.
The Prime Minister was speaking to journalists on her way home from Florence. She told...
Fears for Rochdale black pudding supply as Bury announces plans to exit Lancashire free...
Rochdale residents with a taste for black pudding were left fearing for the future as Bury announced plans to leave the Lancashire Economic Community....
Chances of Patel having job by Christmas looking Priti grim
Theresa May's office has commented on the departure from the usual policy of ministers confining themselves to work on behalf of the country, and...
Fruit salad cancer risk
Fruit salads may cause cancer, top Latvian scientists have found. The study, published in Eat My Carcinoma, has sent shockwaves through fruit communities and...
Millwall football fans hail Supreme Court with bricks and bottles after Blair no criminal...
Buoyed by the Supreme Court's ruling that there was no law of criminal aggression with which to prosecute Tony Blair, Millwall Football Club supporters...
Wetherspoons launches Thursday night Gammon Time menu
Wetherspoons new Thursday night Gammon Time menu has been declared a stunning success by Wetherspoons gammon in chief Hamhock O'Porcine.
Hamhock said, "We've decided to...
David Brent to sing Equality Street at Trump Inauguration
Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.
Prison not a muslamic themed holiday camp after all says Paul Golding
Paul Golding, hero of the Free British Peoples and shiny-faced wankpuffin, has told Britain Furst colleagues that it turns out prisons are not "Butlins...
Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters
Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University's Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...



















































