Badgers vote for cull of Conservative MPs
Radical badgers have declared Dingley Dell an independent sovereign state and have threatened violent action against Conservative MPs in response to the continuing cull.
The...
EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain
The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...
Freestyle rapper, Rees-Moggy Mogg to win back Conservative youth vote
In a bid to appear more accessible to young people the Conservative party have updated the image of some of their more prominent MPs.
The...
Six year old girl fears poisoning after finding new food mixed into her food
Six year old Sally Parker, domestic overseer and student, has recoiled in horror fearing poisoning after the discovery of new food mixed into food...
Daily Express forecasts two feet of dead pensioners will fall in Central London by...
The Daily Express has warned readers that 20% of them will die this week because of the "Beast from the east".
Pensioner, Stan Still said,...
Jeremy Corbyn’s conference speech just him saying “Oh Jeremy Corbyn” for 1 hour
Jeremy Corbyn's conference speech has been rapturously received by conference delegates.
The speech consisted solely of Corbyn repeating the line, "Oh Jeremy Corbyn" for a...
Emmanuel Macron meets Boris Johnson to tell him to fuck off in person
Following a hectic fortnight of being booed in Scotland, Northern Ireland, Wales and the children's ward in a Cornish Hospital, Prime Minister Boris Johnson...
Remain campaigners thwarted by import shortage of “I Told You So”s
Anti-Brexit campaigners are suffering from a shortage of "I Told You So"s, as "Project Fear" rapidly swings into "Operation I Told You So", as...
Herald Editor Treated For Shock After Finding Journalism in Daily Mirror
The Editor of the Rochdale Herald is recuperating in Rochdale General Hospital after accidentally finding some quality journalism in The Daily Mirror.
Artisan coffee is actually just coffee, admits pretentious twat
A pretentious twat from Rochdale has admitted that so-called artisan coffee is actually just the same as all other coffee, just a bit more...
Home Office confirms that new blue UK passports will be HALAL-CERTIFIED
The Home Office has confirmed that the United Kingdom's post-Brexit passport covers will be halal-certified.
The iconic Royal blue cover, which is due to be...
Failed withdrawal expected to lead to painful Labour
Using the withdrawal method requires a high level of self-control. Even then, the withdrawal method isn't especially effective.
On the face of it (which is...
Jacob Rees-Mogg announces plan for every UK baby to have his DNA by 2040
This is a key policy behind Rees-Mogg's bid for the Conservative party leadership.
According to leaked documents, he is going to take his cue from...
Further scandal as so called satirical page Southend News Network owners aren’t even Southern!
In what is turning out to be a much dragged out saga of scandal after scandal from those jumped up meme thieves over at...
British Public shocked to learn Pizza and San Miguel not Mediterranean Diet
Rochdalians are being reminded today that having a deep pan 16 inch spicy meat special doesn't count as following a Mediterranean diet- even if...
Amber Rudd announces plan to ban envelopes
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has announced that envelopes will be banned from the end of the month.
The Home Office has also announced that all...




















































