Magic Mushroom

Magic mushroom season not as bad as rumoured

0
Rumours that this year's magic mushroom season has been a let down are made of regret and the memory of socks from Bolivia, says...

Satan refuses cabinet position in reshuffle

0
In a surprising turn of events Satan has declined an offer to join Theresa May's new cabinet saying it would be "damaging" to his reputation.
Prince Philip

Prince Philip to star in new season of The Walking Dead

0
There are rumours circulating today that Prince Philip will get a central role in a new series of, The Walking Dead. The show depicts characters...

Mike Pence attends Broadway musical by mistake

0
Vice-President elect Mike Pence was roundly booed after he attended a performance of Broadway musical ‘Hamilton’ entirely by accident.
Rats

Rats accuse Boris Johnson and David Davis of Cultural Appropriation

0
Yesterday following a heated meeting over Brexit David Davis and Boris Johnson resigned from their positions as Minister for Brexit and Foreign Secretary respectively. The...

The Smiths to reform for Cameron benefit concert

5
Legendary 80s Manchester miserablists The Smiths are to reform for a one-off benefit concert for former UK prime minister David Cameron, a spokesperson for...
If we can pay for food we can pay for rockets - say NASA

If we can pay for food we can pay for rockets – say NASA

0
American space go-getters NASA are said to be up in arms about budget restrictions while there is still enough money available to feed some...

George Osborne represents the new Standard Londoner

0
There was surprise throughout the media world today when it was announced that Gideon "George" Osborne, MP for Tatton, would join the London Evening...
John Lewis Weasel

Accusations of Racism Hit John Lewis Commercial

0
The new John Lewis advert, featuring a black British family giving their daughter a trampoline for Christmas has been denounced as racist. "It's an...

Downing Street denies allegations of incontinence

0
In an unprecedented announcement, Downing Street issued a denial of any suggestions that the Prime Minister is incontinent. "During a period of initial uncertainty, many...
Bearded "hipster"

Hipster twats demand clean shaven white twats condemn terror twats

1
Nathan Barley led calls today for clean shaven white twats to “take responsibility for their community.” “It is imperative, at this time of national crisis,...

Token female cycling club member thrilled to have been described as attractive

0
A magazine feature by Cycling Weekly on the Hinckley Cycle Racing Club from Leicestershire was lambasted today after going to print with the caption...

Christian groups OUTRAGED as Apple replace Christian emojis with Islamojis

10
The next update to Apple's iOS devices will feature almost 100 Islamic emojis, dubbed Islamojis, replacing almost all Christian iconography available on the iPhone...

Vegan runs Great South Run without telling anybody he’s a vegan

0
A vegan has reportedly completed the Great South Run today without feeling the need to tell everyone.
Laptop

Not all men, say men

0
Men would like you to know that the thing a man just did, just isn't something they would do Following a recent incident where a...

Feminist nominated for comedy award they didn’t enter after Facebook tirade

0
Ipswich feminist Leigh Askew has been included on the shortlist for a new category at the British Comedy Awards. The inaugural Funniest Social Media Post...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts