Hospitals to open thousands of ‘transition wards’ to end winter crisis
Health - Health Secretary James Hunt today told The Rochdale Herald that a "space restructurement" at hospitals across the country would put paid to...
Dead refugees welcome say Home Office
Refugees will be welcome to Great Britain providing they are dead, under a new scheme announced by the Home Office.
The new measures, expected to...
Pigeon chess champion embarrassed at being included in metaphor with Boris Johnson
A pigeon chess grand master from Rochdale has been telling us how he finds it a embarrassing to be included with Boris Johnson in...
Donald Trump Jr upset by chants of ‘lock him up’ from Donald Trump Snr
Donald Trump Jr has allegedly complained that President Trump keeps chanting 'lock him up' at him.
Trump Junior made a complaint to a White House...
Khan To Rebuild Wall
Sadiq Khan, flanked by millions of people of various ethnic backgrounds who by and large couldn't give a flying shit where each other is...
Man Wastes Full Day watching repeats of Come Dine with Me
Distraught butcher Brendan Slaughter from Wigan was mortified to learn that it was 9:00pm last Sunday night when he had work at 5:00am.
"I was...
The Queen asks Merkel to form a government
Her Majesty the Queen is expected to travel to Berlin later today to ask German Chancellor Angela Merkel to form a government for the...
Coronavirus maybe more deadly than Iain Duncan Smith warns Government
The Government is warning that Coronavirus could be more deadly than Iain Duncan Smith. The warning comes as the number of cases in Britain...
Gap between rich and poor not an issue say rich bastards
The massive gap between the poorest peoples' lot and the vomit-inducing wealth of the world's richest isn't really important, insist representatives for the world's...
Greta Thunberg releases Scandinavian Death Metal album.
The music world has been surprised by the release of an album by Greta Thunberg and the Prophets of Doom, a new death metal...
Racists awarded PIP’s under new mental health provisions
Penny Mordor MP, Secretary of State for Disabled People, Work and Health announced this morning wide ranging changes to the qualification criteria for PIP (Personal Independence...
Chris Rea spends second night in Charnock Richards Services.
Gravel-voiced guitar stalwart, Chris Rea, is still trying to get home for Christmas this year, after the 'Road to Hell' star's head gasket went...
Outrage in Rochdale over proposed Santa suit ban
Rochdale religious groups are screaming red white and blue murder over a proposed ban on the traditional Santa suit.
This follows the New Year outrage...
Do you have the X Factor? Join in our interactive game.
X Factor fans will be delighted to see the return of the unfathomably popular "talent" show this evening.
To celebrate the new series we at...
U.S transgender community ‘relieved’ they will not die fighting for Trump
As President Trump, leader of the free world, announced that transgender citizens would no longer be allowed to serve the U.S. Armed forces in...
Brexiteers to die of cirrhosis 20% sooner thanks to Wetherspoons
Price cuts on just before date-expired cask ale and fizzy lager mean that Wetherspoons customers will be able to drink themselves to death more...
