TM + DUP 4EVA carved into Magic Money tree by PM

4
Theresa May spent the afternoon hand in hand with Arlene Foster and the rest of the Democratic Unionist Party skipping through Hyde park stopping...

Media blackout of J***** C***** continues

0
All national media outlets are continuing with their agreement to stop any reporting of a certain well known political leader this week, who we...

Mime artist finds way out of glass box

0
Mime artists across the world are silently applauding the first ever recorded occurrence of a mime artist breaking out of a glass box. There was...

Man receives bravery award for going into work with Cold

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A Rochdale man was praised for his bravery and selfless act of dedication this morning after he heroically battled through the worst cold he...
Book

World book day sparked hate incident

0
An unfortunate faux pas occurred yesterday at St Timothy's primary school in Rochdale. Gareth Brown, a year 5 pupil was sent home after arriving at school...

Couple spend entire evening on Netflix before deciding what film to watch at 1am

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Johnny and Mary (not real names) are just your average suburban dwelling couple who work hard on the weekdays and like to relax in...

Paul Hollywood slammed for attending birthday party dressed as Nigel Farage

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Great British Bake Off star Paul Hollywood has apologised after being pictured dressed as Nigel Farage at a fancy dress party. The 51-year-old said the...

Elderly white bloke invoking blitz spirit wins Brexit’s Got Talent

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In an emotional final show, 102 year old Tommy Atkins held off challengers by singing Vera Lynn songs in a quavering voice in front...

Boris Johnson praises BBC for spending £250m on non-existent PPE for the Proms

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Boris Johnson has said that Britain shouldn't be ashamed about the BBC's decision to spend £250m on non-existent PPE for the Last Night of...

Tories to increase appeal to younger voters by disbanding

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The Conservative Party have announced they intend to disband after this years party conference in Manchester. Political analyst Ecgbert Wonk said, "The last election showed...
Game of Thrones

Cabinet to watch Game of Thrones to pick up tips on killing each other

10
Theresa May has reportedly ordered her cabinet, and junior ministers, to watch Game of Thrones in order to get better at killing one another. This...

Conservatives horrified at ‘meagre’ income of BBC presenters

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On Wednesday in was revealed to the public how much some of our favourite BBC Presenters earn, as well as some rubbish ones too. The...

Paul Nuttall Converted To Islam

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Paul Nuttall has retracted a claim on his Facebook page from 2009 that he converted to Islam after sharing a kebab with Mohammed Ali. "I never...
Turn it off and on

Team behind the May-Bot to try turning it off and back on again

The Project May-Bot team have announced that due to recent poor performance and unexpected features being noted, they are looking into resetting the May-Bot...
Jeremy Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn demands General Election so voters can choose between Brexit or Brexit

0
Jeremy Corbyn has demanded that the Government call a General Election in order that the public can choose between his insane version of Brexit...
Telly Tubbies

Tinky Winky to return half of salary after identifying as a woman

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BBC bosses have demanded that Teletubbies star Tinky Winky hand back half the wages ever paid over the course of the show after she...

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