Feminist nominated for comedy award they didn’t enter after Facebook tirade

0
Ipswich feminist Leigh Askew has been included on the shortlist for a new category at the British Comedy Awards. The inaugural Funniest Social Media Post...

Labrador accused of virtue signaling by other dogs for returning thrown ball

0
A Labrador has been slammed by fellow dogs for 'conforming to archaic, patriarchal stereotypes' after returning a ball thrown by its owner, it was...

Britain First’s meme maker in coma

0
As Poppy Day draws ever closer, the strain of making anti Muslim memes has proven to much for Britain First's head of social media, Tommy...

David Davis hospitalised after failing to negotiate his way out of wet paper bag

0
It is reported that every staff member on the exercise rapidly ripped a hole into the side of the giant, wet paper bag and emerged unscathed and rejuvenated, except David Davis, who seemed to struggle.

Hopkins’ lobotomy was cosmetic surgery, doctors reveal

0
Rochdale Community University Hospital was proud to announce the complete success of their most prestigious piece of cosmetic neurosurgery today. Originally described as a procedure to address...

Oscars turmoil as Trump mistakenly awarded prize as “President of La La land”

0
The 90th annual academy award "Oscars" ceremony was thrown into turmoil when Donald Trump was mistakenly awarded the best actor prize for his role...

Post Office denies responsibility for items lost in Post

4
Today The Post Office officially denied responsibility for undelivered items getting lost in the postal system. Post Office spokespostie, Patrick Clifton, told The Herald; "It's the...
Wetherspoons

Brexiteers to die of cirrhosis 20% sooner thanks to Wetherspoons

0
Price cuts on just before date-expired cask ale and fizzy lager mean that Wetherspoons customers will be able to drink themselves to death more...
Boris Johnson

“Operation Cumshot” – UK gov commits to spunking £100bn on wizard wheeze

0
The UK government has announce a new initiative to spend £100bn on a COVID-19 testing programme, the Rochdale Herald has learned. The initiative, the budget...
Nuttall

UKIP Conspiracy theorists claim Paul Nuttall is being erased from history

0
UKIP leader, Paul Nuttall PhD, is concerned that he is being erased from history by a shadowy group of leftist and liberal media conspirators.  He recently had to...

Community schools plan morning assemblies in Mosques

0
Community schools are to hold mandatory morning assemblies in Mosques across the borough, it has been announced. Rochdale Council made the announcement earlier today, releasing...

Nobody Sufficiently Into Ed Sheeran To Be Fussed About Being First In The Arena

0
Ed Sheeran - like him or dislike him, it seems that nobody has particularly strong feelings about him either way, it would appear. At a...

Sign up to The Rochdale Herald Newsletter

0
The technical gods at The Rochdale Herald have built a very special daily newsletter that goes out every day at 5pm by email. If you...

Forensics Team called after Amber Rudd murders her career

2
Home Secretary Amber Rudd sounded like your mate's racist pissed wife at a children's Christmas party during her speech yesterday. West Midlands Police have said...
The Pope

Pope declares all good atheists can go to heaven

0
In a surprise ecumenical encyclical from the Vatican, Pope Francis has indicated that atheists could be allowed to pass through the Pearly Gates and...
George Michael

George Michael declined 33rd heart transplant after ‘giving them away’

0
The 80's pop sensation 90's cop bothering loiterer and naughties stoner George Michael has been refused the vital surgery by the NHS. Chief Cardiovascular Surgeon...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts