Shitheads get new jobs
London - A bunch of irrelevant shitheads all got new jobs today in London. Theresa May is currently reshuffling the pack of lizards who would...
Nigel Farage leaves LBC for remake of Howards’ Way; Nigels’ Way
Nigel Farage has left LBC and got a job on a new remake of Howards' Way called, Nigels' Way.
Producer Bill Board told us, "Nigel...
Vegan banned from Vegetarian Club when she says quinoa “tastes like chicken”
Food plays a huge part in our lives, many of us enjoying it almost every day.
Ever since rationing was no longer necessary in the...
Woman chains herself up in bid to stop voting for the Conservatives
A mother is so desperate to stop voting for the Conservatives she has chained herself up in her room to prevent access to a...
Rochdale boss dresses down staff after casual Friday turns Nazi
The age old question of trying to persuade employees to continue to care about work on a Friday has vexed employers for decades. A...
Physicists discover Brexit actually a black hole that feeds on political parties
The astrophysics world has been in overdrive this week at the announcement of a newly discovered black hole located somewhere over the English Channel.
The...
Rochdale worries as EU funding crisis hits Cornish supply chain
Mark Duddridge, chairman of the Cornwall and Isles of Scilly Local Enterprise Partnership, has said he wants a guarantee from the UK Government that...
Britain fails GCSE Economics, Business Studies, French, German, Spanish and History
Great Britain was disappointed to learn that she has completely failed GCSE ecomomics, business studies, history, French, German and Spanish today.
While GCSE pass rates...
Only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas, say children
Excitement at a Rochdale school is building after pupils discovered there are only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas.
One teacher at the Robert Mugabe...
Boots fight elitism by pricing poor people out of contraception
High Street favourite Boots has been in hot water lately over the row which arose from the response regarding the morning after pill.
The...
May rains on International Happiness Day with Brexit announcement
March 20th has long been designated International Happiness Day, a day to celebrate all that is good about life in the 21st century.
However there...
Mary and Joseph to appear on the Jeremy Kyle Show following immaculate conception doubts
The parents of Jesus Christ, Mary and Joseph, will appear on a festive edition of the Jeremy Kyle Show next week, following doubts over...
“Messiah” Corbyn Denies Anti-Semitism as Links to ‘People’s Front of Judea’ Emerge
Jeremy Corbyn was today forced to again deny claims of Anti-Semitism after it emerged that he had "strong links" to the Palestinian terrorist organisation...
Fears for safety of Strictly 2016 producers as AdB meets JCC
Strictly Come Dancing returned to our screens this evening in a whirlwind of glitz and glitter. Amongst the celebrities dancing for our pleasure over...
Windsor council workers sledging to work on frozen homeless people
Councillors in Windsor have been seen sledging using the frozen bodies of homeless people.
One told us, "The council wanted them all removed for the...
PARENT’S FURY AT COMPULSORY ARABIC LESSONS AT ROCHDALE PRIMARY SCHOOL
Parents are furious about Rochdale Primary School's decision to force children to learn Arabic symbols in Maths lessons.
Many parents believe that forcing their children...
