New Year Eve Party

Turn your house into a Costa and other tips for hosting gatherings of more...

0
The Government have announced that gatherings of more than 6 people are to be banned. But what do you do if your "Company AGM"...

Middle aged man who bought passata just one small step from red skinny jeans...

0
Rochdale man Stan Still is just a short step away from buying skinny red jeans according to his girlfriend. Alga Rithem, Stan's partner for the...

‘Research confirms Coffee holds key to immortality’

0
There was good news for caffeine drinkers, addicts & nervous twitchers throughout the multiverse today, as stunning new research sensationally revealed that coffee holds...

What to do when your dog dies in your hot car

0
Summer is here and forecasters are predicting a heatwave in the coming weeks. With temperatures expected to hit 30oC the country will be awash...

Rochdale Herald guide to the top ten books to read before you die

0
At the Rochdale Herald it's all about mindfulness and self improvement in January. In that spirit, we take a look at 10 books you should...

Some like it…NOT! Monroe fan’s £8k new look more like man’s best friend than...

0
French waiter Cyril Roux is a HUGE Marilyn Monroe fan. 'I guess you could say I'm addicted to injections,' mumbles Cyril Roux, a 32-year-old waiter...

Couple spend entire evening on Netflix before deciding what film to watch at 1am

0
Johnny and Mary (not real names) are just your average suburban dwelling couple who work hard on the weekdays and like to relax in...

Blitz spirit will see us through says man panic buying sanitary towels and Quinoa

0
The UK's Health Secretary, Matt Hancock, has likened the nation's handling of the Coronavirus pandemic to the "Blitz spirit" which saw plucky Brits through...

Rochdale Man’s attempt to iron his shirt declared a blazing success

0
Unbelievably, a Rochdale man has found the iron and ironing-board and pressed his Friday night drinking shirt, unaided. Last Friday, Alan Bloke (37) was...

Getting drunk and falling over is the real meaning of Christmas, says everyone

0
Heavy drinking from breakfast till unconsciousness has won the top spot in a national survey to discover what makes Christmas so special for the...

Wankers now the majority of the public, scientists conclude.

0
A newly published report shows that 55% of the British public are tossers. Professor Onan Offtherist from the Rochdale Institute of Masturbatory Studies told us...

Brainless moron shaves 30 seconds off his drive home by doing 70 through the...

0
One dickhead has been telling the Herald about how he has found a way to shave 30 seconds off the time it takes him...

Vegans to save UK billion man hours in tedious conversations by wearing hats saying...

0
There is widespread jubilation amongst business leaders around the UK after bold plans to save a billion working man hours a week have been announced by the Institute of Vegans.

Northerner brings Kraft Slices to cheese and wine party in Surrey

0
A disgraced Northerner has been barred from ever returning to the South, after he humiliated his sister at a bourgeoisie Cheese & Wine evening...

Scientists confirm autocorrect was inverted by a cult

0
A group of scientists have today confirmed what we have all long believed, that autocorrect was inverted by a cult. Professor Gerald Wiley spoke to...
Smartphone

I’m definitely not addicted to my smartphone, says person reading this on her smartphone

0
A Rochdale woman has told her friends that she's definitely not addicted to her smartphone, whilst reading a news story about people being addicted...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts