London Motorists furious that cyclists lives might be saved

0
London drivers are currently outraged at London mayor Sadiq Khan's plans to reduce cyclists deaths. "Over half of cyclist deaths in the capital involve construction...
Theresa May

Theresa May gives civil servants 300% wage rise for World Aides Day

0
Unelected Prime Minister and part time Zelda impersonator has managed to anger both equalities protesters and AIDS awareness groups with her latest gaffe. Mrs May...
Boots

Morning-after pill still cheaper than taking kids to Spain during School Holidays insists Boots Chief...

0
High street chemist Boots have defied public pressure to reduce the price of their emergency contraceptive pill claiming it represents excellent value for money...

Tiny Tim declared fit to work by ATOS

0
Dickensian child, "Tiny" Tim Cratchitt has been declared fit to work by ATOS this week despite being both famously crippled and fictional. His father, Robert...

Boots fight elitism by pricing poor people out of contraception

0
High Street favourite Boots has been in hot water lately over the row which arose from the response regarding the morning after pill. The...

Smug twat who gave up smoking for New Year has no friends left

0
New depths of smugness have been plumbed by a man in Clitheroe who gave up smoking on the 1st of January. Tomothy Morning-Wood, who had...

IMPORTANT ADVICE TO STOP SPREAD OF VIRUS

0
The Rochdale Herald would like to pass on advice regarding the nasty viral infection which has reared its ugly head in the UK recently. Please...
Hospital

If you lot weren’t so clumsy we wouldn’t need A&E, says Jeremy Hunt

0
The Minister for Health, Jeremy Hunt, has stated during an interview with our reporter that the pressure felt by A&E staff up and down...

Scottish man DIES after drinking a glass of WATER

0
The first fatality caused by the price increase on alcohol in Scotland was announced this morning. Ian McCreedy aged 42 died at his local...

Virus tests increase to 1 million a day as Matt Hancock includes tests he’s...

0
The UK government has announced that Covid-19 testing has now far surpassed the target figure, coming in at 1 million a day. Health Secretary, Matt...
Angry Man

Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend

0
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning. As millions of us check up on the...

Morrissey spends days in bed

0
Tragic news has reached us here at The Rochdale Herald for all lovers of the morbid mopheaded muso and former front man of The...

Rochdale sex romp for Ozone Day

0
Friday 16th of September was World Ozone Day but residents of a care home in Rochdale have been getting hot under the collar after...

“NHS crisis just preparation for the zombie apocalypse and everyone should be grateful” says...

0
The underfunding and imminent collapse of the NHS is due to a little known government policy on the zombie apocalypse sources have revealed. Zombiepreppers...

Disaster as it’s revealed Government only has enough Care badges for 1 in 5...

0
Undercover reporters for The Rochdale Herald have discovered that the Government only has enough "Care" badges for 1 in 5 care workers as part...

UK obesity epidemic to be tackled by driving the Coca-Cola truck through towns and...

0
Coca Cola have announced that the driver of their self-proclaimed ‘traditional’ Christmas Truck has been instructed to keep moving through the UK towns and...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts