Trump a performance artist, claims Attorney
As the case against Trump supporter and white nationalist butt-nugget Matthew Heimbach heats up, his lawyer has said that Trump may well be called...
Knives sharper than the tools carrying them
Causes of knife crime confirmed to be poor choices of dead victims
As knife crime continues to plague the streets of the capital, a bleeding...
Duke of Edinburgh embroiled in food poisoning compensation scam
The Duke of Edinburgh is reported to have become embroiled in a food poisoning compensation scam scandal today just hours after being discharged from...
Dyslexic holocaust denier accused of being anti-semantic
"It's them Joos again!" exclaimed Noel Iteracy. "I hate Joos, except Orange Juice, they was a good band, but Big Country was huge twats...
Police force man to remove clothing on Rochdale beach
Photographs have emerged of armed police confronting a diver on Rochdale's now notorious Stansfield Beach. In this most recent effort to enforce new laws...
Rochdale mum binge watched Netflix documentaries and is now blood spatter expert
52 year old mother of two Janice Longthorne has spent so many hours watching Netflix shows such as 'Making a Murderer' (seasons one and...
Hillsborough survivors reassure families of Grenfell Tower victims that justice will be swift
Hillsborough a fine benchmark. Reports are reaching Herald HQ that Grenfell survivors paused on their way out of the tower to loot the dead. They...
Intentional explosions totally different to terror
After around 30 people were injured, many more shocked and people consequently feeling terrified, New York officials are keen to point out that the...
Britain First strangely quiet over Jo Cox murder
This week saw the conviction and sentencing of Thomas Mair in the case of the tragic murder of MP Jo Cox.
During the murder, the...
Rising crime and falling numbers of police are incredible coincidence, insists Downing Street
Rising crime rates and the falling numbers of policemen on the streets are just an amazing coincidence and are in no way related, sources...
Tories Include Return of Death Penalty In Election Manifesto
The Conservative Party has surprised many by including a return of the death penalty in their election manifesto.
Explaining the eye catching manifesto promise, Jacob...
Daily Mail Editor sectioned after being confused by photograph of white terrorist
The Editor of The Daily Mail was carried out of Northcliffe House in a straitjacket this morning after a photograph of a white man...
Expansion of stop and search powers opposed by MPs and other criminals
Leaked Home Office document shows that the high concentration of police at the entrance to Parliament could lead to unprecedented levels of stop and...
Police fear French blogger killed in whipped cream accident may have topped herself
The international irony reservoir was overflowing this week as news came through that French lifestyle and fitness blogger, Becky Fromage-Burger, was slain in her...
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
Sir Philip Green in Robin Hood Shocker
Serial cash withdrawer Sir Philip Green has caused fresh controversy today with claims that revered British folk hero Robin Hood was the' worst sort...



















































