National News

Boris Johnson today ran into further hot water, or perhaps hot oil, over comments responding to Nicola Sturgeon's view that only an Independent Scotland could protect itself from the "Brexit Fallout". In what have come...

A globally devastating nuclear war could prove to be a massive boost for post Brexit British industry, the UK's Secretary of State for International Trade, former Secretary of State for Defence, and enthusiastic poultry...

Seven times unelected former UKIP leader Nigel Farage has announced he may be in favour of the UK's European Union membership after all. In an historic reversal of his long standing support for the UK...

Britain's most patriotic patriots have led calls for everyone in the country to be forced to inject themselves with poppies. The push for proper respect for our troops has secured backing from across the...

Prince Harry has been ruled unfit for work by ATOS after attending a work capability assessment. "The Prince was sanctioned last month after he missed his first appointment; the excuse given was that he was...

For three days smoke has filled the skies above north Manchester as Saddleworth moor has been seemingly ablaze, leaving North Manchester covered in a fog of settling smoke. The recent heatwaves has caused the grass...

Nicola Sturgeon is to give a massive boost to renewable energy later today by droning on about the "way forward for Scotland" and as many IndyRefs as it will take to power the National...

Camden fire chiefs are today red faced at having to admit to missing bleedin' obvious fire hazards in poor peoples' containment blocks on all previous safety checks. Following the Grenfell block fire tragedy councils across...

Holiday giant Thomas Cook have taken action after coming under pressure from the Government and consumer groups over the price of family holidays during school term times. They are now offering huge 40%...

Accident prone Paul Nuttall, leader of UKIP, faced fresh tragedy today after learning that all his ‘close personal seats’ were lost in an election catastrophe. Grim-faced Paul had returned home after spending time on the...

Experts in worldwide trends are predicting that 2017 will reach terminal levels of warmth by mid-June. Professor Thorfin Nerfstretcherrsson, Head of Rochdale Community University's department of Genocide, has this to say on the subject, "Well since...

Tommy Robinson has been explaining his disappointment at attending what he thought would be aa Koran burning event that turned out to be a Korean Barbeque. Robinson, speaking exclusively to The People's Friend said "I...

At 01:00 on Tuesday 3rd January, Britain's worst quake for 25 years hit Scarborough, Yorkshire measuring 5.2 on the Richter scale and causing untold disruption and distress.  The tremor decimated the area causing approximately £30...

Praying for the survivors and victims of the Grenfell Tower fire is definitely the least you can do experts have claimed. Dr Frederick Seddon of Rochdale College said, "We've analysed a range of things...

A teenager has told us how he believes he's bought his girlfriend the perfect Christmas gift. 16 year old Nathan Brindley has been seeing Emma Featherstone since April this year. He told us, "I read...

Experts are tonight warning that Britain's stoner community could run out of things to talk about in as little as 24 hours. The warnings come amidst rumours that the Government is considering legalising cannabis. Dr...