Westboro Baptist Church

Westboro Baptist Churchgoers saddened by news that God actually hates FAQ’s

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Congregation of famously homophobic church disheartened to learn that The Almighty is 'proper hacked off with being asked the same dumb shit over and...
Brexiter

Brexiter fury as Europe steals patented British Divide and Conquer negotiating strategy

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Brexiters across this once mighty country were swearing into their fry ups this morning with the discovery the EU has a negotiating strategy. "It's just...

ACEA: No U-Turn on Right-hand Drive Cars

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The European Automobile Manufacturers Association (ACEA: Association des Constructeurs Européens d'Automobiles) looks set to cease the production of right-hand drive vehicles by mid-2019. The decision...
Muhammadu Buhari

President of corrupt shithole country to meet President of Nigeria Muhammadu Buhari

Nigerian President Muhammadu Buhari will become the first leader from sub-Saharan Africa to be received by the President of the corrupt North American tin...

Macron wants UK to give him head in return for Bayeux tapestry

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Monarchists were today outraged by the suggestion by Emmanuel Macron, President of France, that the severed heads of the British royal family would be...
Trump Supporters

Trump recorded saying “Trump Supporters are fat, racist white trash”

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‘Rumours that Donald Trump described his legions of supporters as "obese trailer park trash" and "uneducated fucking idiots" are yet to be confirmed.

Sir Richard Branson arrested for looting in British Virgin Islands

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Billionaire adventurer and entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson is currently in custody in the British Virgin Islands after being arrested for looting, according to reports....
Trump and Mike Pence

President Trump recorded offering Mike Pence presidency in exchange for Trump family pardon ticket

0
Leaked recordings of President Trump phoning vice president Mike Pence from a golf course appear to reveal the sitting president has offered Pence the...

May to appeal to Supreme Court ruling at European Court of Justice

5
In a move that has thoroughly confused political observers, Theresa May has instructed the Attorney General to appeal today's Supreme Court judgement on Article...
White House

Playboy bunnies to be re-homed at The Whitehouse

18
After the sad passing of millionaire feminist Hugh (the Hef) Hefner the dilemma of what to do with the dozens of now ownerless and...
Gay Men

Gays seen boarding ark two by two in Texas saying ‘our work here is...

6
An ark has been spotted in Texas picking up a group of homosexuals who caused all the flooding there. The findings have come as a...

Trump Invades Iraq

President Trump has declared war on Iraq after a five minute conversation with Tony Blair. The former British PM, referred to by White House officials...
Donald Trump & Jermey Kyle

Donald Trump to appear on Jeremy Kyle Show

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Jeremy Kyle was said to be jubilant this morning after securing an exclusive appearance by Donald Trump. The show which is titled "Five children by...

Despair after terrible person makes valid point

A man has been left bereft of all hope for the future after discovering that the worst person he knows might have made a...

Russian Government Denies Hacking Rochdale Herald

The Russian Government has reacted angrily towards allegations that it was responsible for hacking UK news site The Rochdale Herald. The Herald, which is...
Dumpster Fire

Dumpster fires unhappy about comparisons to US Democracy

13
Skip fires around the world have declared they are unhappy with being compared to the US democratic process.

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