It’s not nepotism it’s just a coincidence he’s my son-in-law says Trump

9
World breathes a collective sigh of relief as journalist who met Jared Kuschner claims “he should make you feel more comfortable”.
Donald Trump

White House desperately concealing news of Twitter character increase from Trump

0
The twittersphere is in overdrive this morning with millions of users tweeting out their hope that the White House is able to conceal the...
Justice

Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’

Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...

Australia in early fireworks embarrassment

15
We have heard news that fireworks have been sighted a full 12 hours before new year in Syndney Harbour, Australia. The fireworks that were reported to...
Donald Trump

Trump turns down White House sexual harassment course because ‘I’m already pretty good at...

0
News broke this morning that Donald Trump has turned down an offer from the White House human resources department to attend a special course...
Harvey Weinstein

Harvey Weinstein one step closer to presidency after filing for bankruptcy

0
The New York studio co-founded by disgraced film producer Harvey Weinstein is to file for bankruptcy, in a move sure to put him a...

J K Rowling denies seven figure sum to write ‘President Trump and the White...

0
Other proposed titles in the series are, ‘Vladimir Putting and the Half Brained President’, ‘Donnie Trump and the Gob of Fire and Fury’, ‘President Trump and the Prisoner of Asshat’, ‘Donald Trump and the Magic Revolving Door of Power’ and ‘Donald in the Competition to be Crazier than North Korea’.
Trump

Trump allowed to leave Whitehouse on his own for first time

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President Trump has arrived in Saudi Arabia on the first leg of his International tour. Before landing Mr Trump told the Herald, "We have much in...
Obi Wan Kenobi

‘What happened on Alderaan was terrible but I condemn the violence done by all...

7
Obi Wan Kenobi, under pressure from Yoda and other members of the ghost Jedi Council to condemn the destruction of Alderaan, has issued a...

Trump adds Germany to Travel Ban after hostages taken at Nakatomi Tower

Donald Trump has added the populations of Germany and Austria to his controversial travel ban after hearing reports that terrorists have taken hostages at the Nakatomi Tower in Los Angeles, again.

I don’t care what UK Ambassador thinks of me, says dickhead who won’t shut...

0
A giant man dayglo baby who won't stop whining about somebody who said some mean things about him has declared on Twitter that he...
Ivanka Trump

Donald Trump’s penis not bigger than Kim Jong Un’s, confirms Ivanka Trump

0
Sources close to the President have confirmed that Donald Trump's willy is not bigger than Kim Jong Un's. It is being reported around the world...

Hilary Clinton’s emails confirm she would have already nuked North Korea

1
Further extracts reveal she had plans to construct “Wall Street on the Korean Peninsula” once the “dust and stuff has settled.”

Condoms are a commie liberal plot to give everybody AIDS according to Trump VP

0
Revelations of comments  made by Donald Trump's running mate, the 'Caucasian Executioner of Indiana', Mike Pence show that Governor Pence might not know how...
Alex Jones

Alex Jones discusses the Trump presidency

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Good evening. Today I am speaking to Radio host and Bacofoil and batshit salesman, Alex Jones.  Good afternoon, Alex. How are you feeling after Trump's rather...
Soldier

U.S. military buys Viagra after being told troops need to “be hard”

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It has emerged this week that the U.S. military spend approximately £63 million annually on the popular medication which aids erectile dysfunction. This baffling...

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