Bear Cancels Plan To Shit In Woods
Bryan Pickle, an unemployed brown bear, interrupted a meeting at The National History Museum this morning to make a surprise announcement.
"I've been thinking about...
David Duke retracts Trump endorsement saying no room for “locker room banter” in politics
In sensational news today David Duke, the former head of the Ku Klux Klan, has withdrawn his support for Republican Presidential Candidate Donald Trump.
Angry terrorist given away by distinctive red hat
An angry teenager with the mental age of an eleven year old suspected of international terrorism offences has been arrested because he was wearing...
Gove calls for post-Brexit legalisation of cannibalism
Former Tory minister and leading Brexit campaigner Michael Gove has called on the government to slash EU regulations on cannibalism which he claims have...
ISIS leader admits 2014 invasion was just a stag do that ‘got a bit...
WITHIN THE LAST HOUR the leader of the so-called Islamic State group, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, has issued a statement admitting that the whole thing was...
Sir Richard Branson arrested for looting in British Virgin Islands
Billionaire adventurer and entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson is currently in custody in the British Virgin Islands after being arrested for looting, according to reports....
Aung San Suu Kyi surrenders Freedom of Dublin refusing to share the honour with...
Burmese leader Aung San Suu Kyi has given up her Freedom of the city of Dublin in protest at sharing the distinction with Bono,...
Mary forced to give birth on stable floor after health insurance refuses to cover...
A woman that claims she's about to give birth to the son of God has told the Herald, about how she is being forced...
Syrian children launch crowdfunding campaign to help those affected by KFC crisis
Children from the Syrian city of Damascus have launched a campaign to help those affected by the ongoing KFC chicken shortage.
In a video posted...
Britain threatens Russia with visit from Boris Johnson
There were extraordinary scenes in Parliament today as Boris Johnson spoke about the suspected poisoning of Sergei Skripal.
Mr Johnson said, "If Russian involvement is...
We’re doing just fine says President of country whose hobbies include shooting children at...
The so-called President of a country that lists shooting children at school amongst its most popular hobbies has told the UK Prime Minster to...
Sanctimonious tax avoiding ex-pat hands back key to city he doesn’t live in for...
London-dwelling sanctimonious tax-avoider Bob Geldof has said he will return his Freedom of the City of Dublin.
Geldof, a remarkably rich registered non-dom who pays...
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
Trump Campaign Manager to be Replaced by Super Nanny
In a twist to today's latest gaffe by Donald Trump, his campaign manager has resigned citing lack of experience on his part. Jo Frost,...
Carolinians told to evacuate to avoid category 4 Trump visit
Residents of the US State of Carolina have been warned to evacuate due to the threat of a category 4 visit from Donald Trump.
State Governor,...
Donald Trump to join list of ‘self-aware’ animals after recognising himself in a mirror
US President Donald Trump joined the list of animals capable of self-awareness yesterday, following reports that he may have finally recognised himself in a...
