Pathologist

Not being liked by Vladimir Putin IS natural causes, confirms coroner

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The UK police have admitted that perhaps they had jumped to a hasty conclusion after coroners concluded that a Russian businessman who strangled himself...

New cold war looms as Trump aspires to make American prostitutes better than Russian...

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Concern that America is falling behind Russia in the pay-for-sex industry was allayed last night after President Donald J Trump announced a new ‘hooker...

Mike Pence attends Broadway musical by mistake

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Vice-President elect Mike Pence was roundly booed after he attended a performance of Broadway musical ‘Hamilton’ entirely by accident.

Hammond to Create National Hoard

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In advance of Brexit negotiations Phillip Hammond is to bury all of the country's wealth in a hole in the ground. The hole, believed to...
trump salute

Donald Trump autobiography ‘My Struggle’ set for December release

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A spokesman for Donald Trump has announced that the eagerly anticipated Trump autobiography is set for release in early December just in time for...
Trump Toilet Seat

President Trump ‘leaves toilet seat up’ claims explosive new book

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Washington has been shocked by a controversial new book which claims that, on occasion, President Trump forgets to put the toilet seat down. The...
Pepe the frog

Meme Jihadis Trump Clinton

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Pepe the frog has admitted today that he was behind the success of Donald Trump in the recent US presidential elections. "Presidential? Fix-a-dential more like!...

DUP ask Merkel for one billion Euros to give her their support in Bundestag

9
News broke this morning that the Northern Ireland political party, the DUP, has demanded one billion euros from Angela Merkel in order to support...

Barack Obama wakes up in White House shower, Trump administration just a bad dream

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As we wake up and greet the new year, President Barack Obama has a weird and wonderful story to tell. We managed to catch up...
Trump with manbun

NATO leaders issue declaration of unity against Donald Trump

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NATO leaders have issued a statement of unity aimed at preserving the alliance against Donald Trump. One spokesman said, "It may seem strange that we're...

Irishman confused by difference between abortions and prosecuting women

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An Irish fella is presently proving himself more full of gas than a tinker's hound by spouting no end of shite on the twitters....
Kim Jong Un

Kim Jong Un claims he is six months away from being able to launch...

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In a further act of provocation, North Korea says it has conducted yet another controversial social message test. The claim was bellowed out over the...

I don’t care what UK Ambassador thinks of me, says dickhead who won’t shut...

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A giant man dayglo baby who won't stop whining about somebody who said some mean things about him has declared on Twitter that he...

May to wear codpiece and alpha male pig hormone for Trump meeting

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In a bid to protect from pussy grabbing and give the impression of a large penis and aura of dominance, Theresa May will today...
Nuttall

Paul Nuttall admits to FBI he passed US nuclear secrets to Russia

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Paul Nuttall has sensationally admitted to the FBI that he passed US military secrets to Russia. In a statement to the FBI Mr Nuttall admitted delivering...

Hurricane Harvey considered least destructive 2020 presidential candidate

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In an attempt to win back votes from the orange-painted tweeting shitangutan, the Democrats have turned to Hurricane Harvey to stand as their candidate...

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