Turkey uses remaining irony reserves after vote to abolish democracy
The official Turkish news agency (prop. R. T. Erdogan) reports that in a historic vote on Sunday, the people of Turkey voted overwhelmingly in...
Abu Hamza to be welcomed back to the UK with State Visit
Hate preacher Abu Hamza has been invited to a State Visit after Number 10 revealed that they are widening the scope of the unsavoury...
Campaign to send 58 million toffee pennies to Syria
Overseas aid charity, Feed the World, has launched a campaign to collect everyone's unwanted Christmas 'treats' and send them to Syria and other war-torn...
ISIS leader admits 2014 invasion was just a stag do that ‘got a bit...
WITHIN THE LAST HOUR the leader of the so-called Islamic State group, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, has issued a statement admitting that the whole thing was...
ISIS claim responsibility for self-service checkouts
So called 'Islamic State' have claimed responsibility for supermarket self service checkouts.
A statement released by ISIS said they came up with the idea after...
The Middle East starts packing as Blair hints at return to politics
The Oxford English definition of irony, former Middle East Peace Envoy, Tony Blair, suggested a political return may be on the cards in a...
Christmas moved to November 12th
Theresa May's government yesterday announced plans to move Christmas forward this year to November the 12th, just in case we don't all reach December.
The...
Historic ruling means Saudi men finally allowed to make women driver jokes
Equality campaigners were today celebrating as Saudi Arabia made a long-overdue change to its oppressive rules which prevent men from making jokes about women's...
The only chemicals you can kills kids with are high explosives and white phosphorus,...
Following the outcry over the alleged chemical weapons attacks in Syria, the Pentagon have confirmed that the only legal chemicals you can use to...
Mary forced to give birth on stable floor after health insurance refuses to cover...
A woman that claims she's about to give birth to the son of God has told the Herald, about how she is being forced...
Chemical Attack was fake news says Asshat
Bashir Assad has denied an attack on Khan Sheikhoun ever took place.
“The attack was a fiction of the Western press,” said the Syrian leader...
Missile strike in Syria; mass outpouring of grief from OneDirection fans
Following the disastrous US missile strike in Syria yesterday which claimed the lives of 57 civilians including 11 children, teenagers and young adults around...
Spirit of 2016 alive and well after gunman dressed as Santa kills dozens in...
2017 is already showing great promise as a dreadful, awful parody of a year following a shootout between police officers possibly disguised as Santa Claus and a gunman disguised as Santa Claus in Turkey.
Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs
Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets.
The move comes after...
Comedians Safe To Call Erdogan A Farthead
Comedians and satirists heaved a sigh of relief today as the prosecution of German comic Jan Böhmermann bubble Erdogan was dropped.
"Finally! Finally! Finally!" said...
Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’
Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...

















































