Middle-East

• Mullets are illegal in Iran • In 2007, Iran arrested 14 squirrels for spying • 70% of Iran’s science and engineering students are not men, but women • Most of the Islamic world mourned and condemned the 9-11 attacks, including Turkey half-masting all flags and Iran holding candlelight vigils • As a man, you can be arrested in Iran for wearing shorts • Iran tried to get into the Guinness book of Records in 2008 by making the world’s largest sandwich, but people started eating it before it could be officially measured so they failed •

Missile strike in Syria; mass outpouring of grief from OneDirection fans

Following the disastrous US missile strike in Syria yesterday which claimed the lives of 57 civilians including 11 children, teenagers and young adults around...

ISIS withdraw from Iraq after Blair’s return to politics announcement

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Tony Blair yesterday announced that he intended to fill a massive hole and that after that he'd return to British politics. In an interview he...
Blair Middle East Refugees

The Middle East starts packing as Blair hints at return to politics

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The Oxford English definition of irony, former Middle East Peace Envoy, Tony Blair, suggested a political return may be on the cards in a...

People of Aleppo not quite white enough

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European leaders have come together to stress how upset they are that the people of Aleppo have ever so slightly funny coloured skin and...
Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson backtracks after accidentally telling truth about Saudi Arabia

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After Boris Johnson was recorded last week saying that countries such as Iran and Saudi Arabia often fight proxy wars in the Middle East...

Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs

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Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets. The move comes after...
Justice

Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’

Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...

Jeremy Corbyn reveals plan to become Iranian Ayatollah

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In a surprising announcement, Jeremy Corbyn has said he plans to become Ayatollah in a bid to replace Ayatollah Ali Khamenei in Iran. A spokesman...
Missiles flying into sky

Russia to shoot down all planes in Syrian airspace, including their own

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This morning Russia released an announcement stating that any and all aircraft entering Syrian airspace will be immediately shot down without warning.   This, apparently,...

Women remain underrepresented amongst Taliban leadership

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It has been revealed that women remain underrepresented amongst the leadership of the Afghan terrorist group the Taliban. An internal review carried out by...
Erdogan

Turkish referendum definitely not rigged, says head of the Turkish Electoral Commission Recep Erdogan

The Head of the Turkish Electoral Commission has put to rest rumours of vote rigging in Sunday's referendum to give almost unlimited powers to...
angry old woman

Islamic State recruitment in crisis after Imam reveals martys actually get nineteen 72 year...

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Islamic State have revealed they've had to enlist the help of a management consultancy company, Sunni side of the street, following a drop in...

Awkward moment for Joseph as Jesus gets Ancestry UK DNA testing kit for Christmas

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In what has been described as the most awkward Christmas gift ever; Jesus has been given an Ancestry UK DNA testing kit for Christmas. One...
Dominic Raab

Dominic Raab announces sanctions on Isle of Aran

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Foreign Secretary, Dominic Raab has announced sanctions on the Isle of Aran. Mr Raaab announced the sanctions during a visit to Blackpool Tower in...

Saudi woman celebrates being able to drive to friends stoning

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A Saudi woman has been telling the Rochdale Herald how she's looking forward to being allowed to drive to the stoning of a woman...

Christmas moved to November 12th

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Theresa May's government yesterday announced plans to move Christmas forward this year to November the 12th, just in case we don't all reach December. The...

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