The only chemicals you can kills kids with are high explosives and white phosphorus,...
Following the outcry over the alleged chemical weapons attacks in Syria, the Pentagon have confirmed that the only legal chemicals you can use to kill children are high explosives and white phosphorus.
“We’ve been happily...
Saudi woman celebrates being able to drive to friends stoning
A Saudi woman has been telling the Rochdale Herald how she's looking forward to being allowed to drive to the stoning of a woman for adultery for the first time next week.
Fatima Hummus told...
Boris Johnson backtracks after accidentally telling truth about Saudi Arabia
After Boris Johnson was recorded last week saying that countries such as Iran and Saudi Arabia often fight proxy wars in the Middle East over who's the most pious and loving of a magic...
Boris meant Saudis are awesome says Defence Secretary Michael Fallon
Boris Johnson’s words on Saudi Arabia and other Middle East powers were misreported, according to a clearly desperate Defence Secretary Sir Mr Michael of Fallon.
Mary forced to give birth on stable floor after health insurance refuses to cover...
A woman that claims she's about to give birth to the son of God has told the Herald, about how she is being forced to give birth on a stable floor.
Mary told us, "I...
Turkish voters refuse to believe Erdogan a dictator till they see it written on...
Turkish voters across the country are still refusing to believe that Erdogan is an autocratic dictator despite the fact that he's locked up all the opposition journalists.
"We need to see it on a big...
Missile strike in Syria; mass outpouring of grief from OneDirection fans
Following the disastrous US missile strike in Syria yesterday which claimed the lives of 57 civilians including 11 children, teenagers and young adults around the world have taken to social media in their hundreds...
Mary and Joseph arrested for health tourism
Reports are reaching us that 2 people have been arrested in Judah on suspicion of being healthcare tourists. The pair say they are parents to the future King of Kings.
A Bethlehem border guard said,...
Aleppo Children launch crowdfunding campaign to replace Kim Kardashian jewellery
Children in Aleppo have called for an official Day of Mourning as they grieve in solidarity with the Kardashian family for the loss of some shiny trinkets.
Loud wailing could be heard echoing through the...
Chilcot stuns world with news that Pope is catholic
Sir John Chilcot has stunned the world by stating again that the Pope is catholic and so it seems is Britain's greatest wartime leader Tony Blair.
The surprising rediscovery was made in an interview with...
Islamic State recruitment in crisis after Imam reveals martys actually get nineteen 72 year...
Islamic State have revealed they've had to enlist the help of a management consultancy company, Sunni side of the street, following a drop in recruitment.
A member of the consultancy told the Herald that the...
Women remain underrepresented amongst Taliban leadership
It has been revealed that women remain underrepresented amongst the leadership of the Afghan terrorist group the Taliban.
An internal review carried out by the Taliban, and leaked to the media, shows that at...
Chemical Attack was fake news says Asshat
Bashir Assad has denied an attack on Khan Sheikhoun ever took place.
“The attack was a fiction of the Western press,” said the Syrian leader who previously said by proxy that it was an attack...
ISIS leader admits 2014 invasion was just a stag do that ‘got a bit...
WITHIN THE LAST HOUR the leader of the so-called Islamic State group, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, has issued a statement admitting that the whole thing was just a stag party dare "that got a bit out...
Turkish referendum definitely not rigged, says head of the Turkish Electoral Commission Recep Erdogan
The Head of the Turkish Electoral Commission has put to rest rumours of vote rigging in Sunday's referendum to give almost unlimited powers to Recep Erdogan.
"The referendum was definitely not rigged." Mr Recep Erdogan,...
Russia to shoot down all planes in Syrian airspace, including their own
This morning Russia released an announcement stating that any and all aircraft entering Syrian airspace will be immediately shot down without warning.
This, apparently, includes Russia's own military aircraft.
General Yuri Bigbangskivich, spokesman for the...
