Leaked memo from US Embassy in London written in Crayon
There has been shock amongst diplomatic circles this morning after a leaked memo written in crayon from the US Ambassador in London revealed that...
RH Exclusive: Excerpt from phone call between Turnbull and Trump
Here at the Rochdale Herald, we’ve managed to get a world exclusive. It’s the leaked transcript of the conversation between President Trump and Prime...
Tony Montana to become new White House communications director
Tony Montana is set to become White House communications director following the sacking of Anthony Scaramucci today.
Mr Montana was last seen toting M16A1 guns...
Trump Named Person of the Year by Shit Hair Magazine
In an unpresidented turn of events, one of Donald Trump's tweets was proven to be correct today after Shit Hair Magazine declared him person...
Donald Trump’s penis not bigger than Kim Jong Un’s, confirms Ivanka Trump
Sources close to the President have confirmed that Donald Trump's willy is not bigger than Kim Jong Un's.
It is being reported around the world...
Jesus definitely said ‘Suffer the little children to come unto me, so I can...
The US Vice President, Mike Pence, has told reporters that the Trump administration's policy of keeping child migrants in cages is definitely consistent with the...
Abu Hamza to be welcomed back to the UK with State Visit
Hate preacher Abu Hamza has been invited to a State Visit after Number 10 revealed that they are widening the scope of the unsavoury...
Concern mounts that US teachers are stockpiling weapons of maths instruction
Deliverable weapons of maths instruction in the hands of a school or tuition network, or the two working together constitutes as grave a threat...
Madame Tussauds new Trump wax work backs out of inauguration
Madame Tussauds have declined to exhibit their new Trump wax work at the impending inauguration on Friday.
Simon Wick, a spokesman for Tussauds said;
"Its nothing...
Texas commemorates first mass shooting by giving students guns to take to school
To celebrate the 50th anniversary of the world's inaugural mass shooting event at the University of Austin in Texas law makers have passed a...
Trump says he believes Melania’s explanation that she didn’t only marry him for his...
Donald Trump has said that he believes that Melania Trump married him for his rugged good looks, sublime conversation and attentive tenderness as a...
Modern Day Presidential latest euphemism for complete and utter numpty, say linguists
As Humpty Dumpty said, "When I use a word, it means whatever I want it to mean." Clearly in a world of self-reductible horseshit,...
Scotch and Revolver sales jump 30,000% during Trump’s inaugural speech
Scotch Whiskey and revolver salesman all over the world are in buoyant mood this afternoon after a huge windfall sales extravaganza during President Trump's inaugural address.
Trump tells CNN all future press conferences will be held in Saudi Embassy
POTATUS has announced that he will begin to give CNN press conferences in Saudi Embassies from now on.
The announcement comes as his administration complained...
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
Trump Replaces White House With Blimp
President Donald Trump took to the skies over Washington today in a giant, orange blimp.
The President is believed to have made the decision...



















































