Trump Airplane

Trump locked out of nuclear football after entering incorrect code three times and forgetting...

28
Apparently POTUS did get Ivanka to click on the “forgotten your password?” help icon on the device that destroys worlds and was offered a series of security questions in order to reset his password.
Trump Bed

Donald Trump insists the song “You’re so vain” was written about him

32
The President of the United States, Donald Trump attended a party in the exclusive Hamptons recently and apparently walked in like he was walking...
Donald Trump

Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration

0
There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event. The demagogue was able to...

Trump barred from White House toilets

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President Donald Trump has been the first victim of his cancellation of orders compelling universities and other institutions to respect personal identity. Although rescinding the orders was...

White House confirms all its press staff do coke

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The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke. The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
Donald Trump

White House admits Trump thought Korean War was fought in Star Trek

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The White House has apparently confirmed that POTATUS, Donald Trump, thought the Korean War was a war fought in the 1970's in Star Trek. The...
Donald Trump

Trump in hiding as NRA call for curb ‘on rapid fire tools’

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DONALD TRUMP is believed to be in hiding tonight after the National Rifle Association called for a clamp-down on “rapid fire tools”. This has been...
Donald Trump

Donald Trump to let Donald Trump fail now as it will be a lot...

0
Donald Trump has decided to extend his executive decision concerning repealing Obamacare to his entire presidency. It is believed the most successful man ever to...

Over-exaggerating totally different to lying your arse off

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Swimmer and US gold medal winning bullshitter, Ryan Lochte, has sort of apologised for making things up. The lying git said that his description of...

Trump says he didn’t sexually assault 3.52 billion other women

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Bewigged bouffant buffoon, Donald J. Trump, an actual potential president, made the claim at his latest rally. The tiny handed eater of souls came under...
Dance Off

Kim Jong Un can’t dance, that brother ain’t got no Seoul

0
“Kim Jong Un? He can’t dance, that brother ain’t got no Seoul. You know I put the rump into Trump babycakes. When I slut drop you know it’s going to be fire and fury on the dance floor.”

White House CCTV confirms Obama listening to Trump in Oval Office

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Secret Service agents are reviewing White House CCTV footage this morning which Donald Trump believes show Obama inside the White House. The footage, captured in...
Independence Day

Trump leads Independence day celebrations by honouring Goldblum and Smith

3
It's the 4th of July national holiday, the anniversary of Independence day in the United States of America. A day when the patriotic celebrate...

Man who works at institution he’s opposed to because he’s paid to says he...

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Nigel Farage, who said a month ago that he wouldn't pledge support for Trump, has appeared at a Trump rally to pledge support for...
Trump Walking

Trump to visit Texas just as soon as the golf courses have been reopened

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Donald Trump has announced he intends to visit areas of Texas affected by flooding just as soon as the cleaning operation on Texan golf...

Trump abandons plans to build wall, resolves to plant Leylandii hedge on Mexican border

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Donald Trump has announced that he's no longer going to demand money to build a wall at the border between the United States and...

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