Marine A

Marine A tired of catchphrase ‘shuffle off this mortal coil you c*nt’

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The soldier formerly know as "Marine A" has finally been released following his time served for slaughtering an injured enemy combatant and recording his...

Nuclear war could be a massive boost for post Brexit British industry

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A globally devastating nuclear war could prove to be a massive boost for post Brexit British industry, the UK's Secretary of State for International...

ISIS win the war by leaving passports at home

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America, Russia and the United Nations admitted defeat earlier today and proclaimed ISIS the winners of the global holy war. President elect Trump has already...

People confused over what Testing is for

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Journalists and other easily baffled people were today up in arms that a thing being tested didn't work as planned. Idiots the country over were...

British Firewall totally not about censorship and spying, says head of spying and censorship...

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GCHQ, the British spy agency that is regularly exposed for bugging our phones and nicking our online data to spy on us, has announced...
HMS Queen Elizabeth

Three billion seems reasonable for boat with hole in it, says Government responsible for...

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The people responsible for negotiating the UK's exit from the European Union have confirmed that three billion pounds is a completely reasonable sum of...

Marines B, C, D, E, F & G escape court martial by not forgetfully...

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Today Marine B was quietly reflecting on the time he shot a badly wounded prisoner of war in Helmand. No one else ever heard about...

Amber Rudd announces plan to ban envelopes

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Home Secretary Amber Rudd has announced that envelopes will be banned from the end of the month. The Home Office has also announced that all...

Arms manufacturers to commemorate the fallen dead

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Since 1919, on the second Sunday of November, otherwise known as Remembrance Sunday, a two minute silence has been observed at 11am at war...

Picture yourself in their shoes

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A picture of Omran Daqneesh, the five year old boy who was pulled from the rubble that used to be his home in Aleppo,...
Nuclear explosion

May denies knee-jerk policy reaction to Trident misfire

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Sources at Number 10 today denied that there was any connection between elements of Theresa May's new industrial strategy and the colossal Trident balls-up...

Trident Subs: Gotta catch ’em all

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Speaking at the Nato summit in Warsaw this week, David Cameron has hinted that almost £16bn ear-marked for the renewal of the Trident nuclear...

French Declare Victory and Award Medals After Sniper Shoots Drinks Waiter

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France has declared 3 days of National holidays after a "hero" sniper accidentally injured two people who were moving cases of Evian at an...
Nuclear explosion

“We’re looking forward to getting out” say nuclear weapons. 

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Nuclear weapons all over the world are today looking forward to their upcoming launch as an opportunity to stretch their legs.  With launch codes about...
Remote pointing at TV

GCHQ Samsung smart TV hack reveals threat to UK

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WikiLeaks revelations that GCHQ has hacked into Samsung smart TV sets to turn them into listening devices has revealed some fascinating facts impacting on...

Chewing gum booms as government invests £100 billion in wrong ‘Trident.’

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An administrative error has seen government funding to renew British nuclear armaments sent to the wrong ‘Trident.’ Earlier today £100 billion was electronically transferred to...

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