Arms manufacturers to commemorate the fallen dead

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Since 1919, on the second Sunday of November, otherwise known as Remembrance Sunday, a two minute silence has been observed at 11am at war...
Drunk man

Thomas the Trident Engine runaway incident: Fat controller was drunk

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Rumours are circulating of a culture of abuse at the MOD, which spilled over in a final steaming argument between the fat controller and...

Fears Thames Beluga whale is a Russian spy

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There are fears a Beluga Whale spotted swimming in the River Thames may be a Russian spy. The whale was spotted earlier this week...

Britain is a sitting duck claims defence chief

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In the face of rumoured cuts to defence spending, Sir Nick Carter The Chief of the General Staff, today warned of Russia's 'eye-watering'...

People confused over what Testing is for

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Journalists and other easily baffled people were today up in arms that a thing being tested didn't work as planned. Idiots the country over were...

Trident satnav and sellotape cutbacks a mistake admits Michael Fallon

3
Top honcho at the MOD, the right honourable Sir Michael Fallon MP, has admitted that cutbacks in the Trident programme may have contributed to...

Lockheed Martin Trident Vote after party “off the hook”

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Details are sketchy at present but apparently the Lockheed Martin Trident Vote after party was absolutely "off the hook". We can only imagine what kind...
Marine A

Marine A tired of catchphrase ‘shuffle off this mortal coil you c*nt’

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The soldier formerly know as "Marine A" has finally been released following his time served for slaughtering an injured enemy combatant and recording his...
HMS Queen Elizabeth

Three billion seems reasonable for boat with hole in it, says Government responsible for...

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The people responsible for negotiating the UK's exit from the European Union have confirmed that three billion pounds is a completely reasonable sum of...

French Declare Victory and Award Medals After Sniper Shoots Drinks Waiter

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France has declared 3 days of National holidays after a "hero" sniper accidentally injured two people who were moving cases of Evian at an...

Revealed: GCHQ Toaster Hack Turns Leavers Into Remainers…

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An exclusive Herald investigation has revealed the extent to which the government's monitoring agency GCHQ can manipulate public opinion through the hacking of common...

Vexatious Claims: A Rochdale Herald Guide

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The government says it wants to dodge certain bits of the European Convention On Human Rights because of an "Industry of false and vexatious...

Missile strike in Syria; mass outpouring of grief from OneDirection fans

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Following the disastrous US missile strike in Syria yesterday which claimed the lives of 57 civilians including 11 children, teenagers and young adults around...

Chewing gum booms as government invests £100 billion in wrong ‘Trident.’

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An administrative error has seen government funding to renew British nuclear armaments sent to the wrong ‘Trident.’ Earlier today £100 billion was electronically transferred to...

Navy admiral rejects job because he can spot a sinking ship when he sees...

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The controversy over the U.S. National Security Advisor position continues as Trump’s most recent nominee for the position, retired vice admiral Robert S Harward, rejected the...

Nuttall to captain UK Olympic waterboarding team

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UKIP party leader, former archbishop of Canterbury, Duke of Edinburgh in Waiting and Huddersfield Town striker, Paul Nuttall has been named as...

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