May denies knee-jerk policy reaction to Trident misfire
Sources at Number 10 today denied that there was any connection between elements of Theresa May's new industrial strategy and the colossal Trident balls-up...
Chinese cardboard rocket manufacturers report bumper earnings following Korean military parades
Manufacturers of gigantic cardboard rockets and inflatable tanks have reported record profits for April following Kim Jong Un's massive display of military force.
"It's been...
Marine A tired of catchphrase ‘shuffle off this mortal coil you c*nt’
The soldier formerly know as "Marine A" has finally been released following his time served for slaughtering an injured enemy combatant and recording his...
Britain is a sitting duck claims defence chief
In the face of rumoured cuts to defence spending, Sir Nick Carter The Chief of the General Staff, today warned of Russia's 'eye-watering'...
When is an aircraft carrier just a carrier?
Britain's new aircraft carrier, HMS Queen Elizabeth, was commissioned today in Portsmouth.
The new carrier is at the cutting edge of British warship design and...
Revealed: GCHQ Toaster Hack Turns Leavers Into Remainers…
An exclusive Herald investigation has revealed the extent to which the government's monitoring agency GCHQ can manipulate public opinion through the hacking of common...
Magic Circle Trigger Terror Alert
Amid growing concern and fears for public safety, illusionist extremists The Magic Circle have been deemed a threat to security and democracy.
The so-called magicians...
Christmas moved to November 12th
Theresa May's government yesterday announced plans to move Christmas forward this year to November the 12th, just in case we don't all reach December.
The...
Navy admiral rejects job because he can spot a sinking ship when he sees...
The controversy over the U.S. National Security Advisor position continues as Trump’s most recent nominee for the position, retired vice admiral Robert S Harward, rejected the...
Dominic Raab announces sanctions on Isle of Aran
Foreign Secretary, Dominic Raab has announced sanctions on the Isle of Aran. Mr Raaab announced the sanctions during a visit to Blackpool Tower in...
People confused over what Testing is for
Journalists and other easily baffled people were today up in arms that a thing being tested didn't work as planned.
Idiots the country over were...
Three billion seems reasonable for boat with hole in it, says Government responsible for...
The people responsible for negotiating the UK's exit from the European Union have confirmed that three billion pounds is a completely reasonable sum of...
Amber Rudd announces plan to ban envelopes
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has announced that envelopes will be banned from the end of the month.
The Home Office has also announced that all...
Dead whale found in Thames was Russian spy
The Government have announced that a whale that has been found dead beside the River Thames was a Russian spy.
The whale was found beside...
French Declare Victory and Award Medals After Sniper Shoots Drinks Waiter
France has declared 3 days of National holidays after a "hero" sniper accidentally injured two people who were moving cases of Evian at an...
Digging f#*#*#g foxholes is new black in today’s British Army
The humble British Army entrenching tool, a short, squat, folding standard NATO issued 3-way shovel, pick and close combat weapon, has surged in popularity amongst...

















































