Roy Moore ordered to pay if he wants another go after coming in a...
The Alabama Secretary of State has told Judge Roy Moore that he will have to finance any recount of the Senate seat vote.
John Merrill...
Hillary Clinton’s ‘Human Suit’ malfunctions at 911 memorial service
The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened...
Donald Trump ‘very sorry’ for accidentally nuking North Carolina
As the world looked on with intrigue and anticipation at the spat between the USA and North Korea, a horrifying incident occurred.
With the...
Hurricane Harvey considered least destructive 2020 presidential candidate
In an attempt to win back votes from the orange-painted tweeting shitangutan, the Democrats have turned to Hurricane Harvey to stand as their candidate...
Dr Samuel Beckett stuck in 2016 after failing to ‘put right what once went...
In the mid 1990's Physicist Dr Samuel Beckett blazed a trail by stepping into his Quantum Leap accelerator and vanishing.
In actual fact he woke to...
Bill Cosby Offers Trump PR Advice Over Sexual Assault Allegations
Dateline this morning, and in the face of a slew of fresh sexual assault allegations, beleaguered Republican presidential hopeful Donald Trump has found himself...
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
Ernst Stavro Blofeld a serious contender for Head of FBI
The White House has announced this morning that Blofeld is on the shortlist for the next head of the FBI following Comey's sacking yesterday.
Sergei Lavrov Trump’s ‘Top Choice’ for new FBI Director
Sources within the Trump administration have downplayed rumours that Russian diplomat Sergei Lavrov is in the running to become the next Director of the...
Trump gives world a ‘pearl necklace’ as withdrawal does not stop emissions
President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the...
Emperor Trump appoints frog-faced racist as UK ambassador to US
In a bold show of complete disregard for the sovereignty of British Parliament, his highness emperor Trump has appointed a well-known and unelected frog-faced...
Donald Trump: DNA test finds ‘strong evidence’ of human DNA
US President Donald Trump has revealed that a DNA test shows "strong evidence" that he is distantly related to human beings.
He took the test...
FBI reveals to Trump evidence of a golf course at Chernobyl
The FBI have allegedly revealed the location of a secret golf course in Chernobyl to Donald Trump today.
One FBI spokesman said, "POTATUS was on...
Trump locked out of nuclear football after entering incorrect code three times and forgetting...
Apparently POTUS did get Ivanka to click on the “forgotten your password?” help icon on the device that destroys worlds and was offered a series of security questions in order to reset his password.
All guns to be armed with guns
In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...
Trump wears tinfoil hat to stop Obama hearing his thoughts…
President Donald J. Trump has come up with an ingenious solution to prevent Obama from ‘spying on his thoughts’. He now wears a tinfoil...
