Terrifying clown in next Stephen King film to be perma-tanned and have a combover

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Stephen King took to twitter today to reveal a juicy nugget regarding his next movie project, ’Idiot’, a sequel to ‘It’, will feature a...
Harvey Weinstein

Harvey Weinstein apologises for James Corden jokes

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Hollywood millionaire Harvey Weinstein has said he is "truly sorry" for cracking jokes about James Corden at a black tie charity dinner in Los...

All guns to be armed with guns

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...
Trump Walking

Trump’s cognitive ability is normal, says White House vet

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WASHINGTON: The actual real-life US President Donald Trump has achieved a normal score on a cognitive exam and is in excellent fettle, although he...

President Trump outlaws Donald Trump in white supremacists condemnation order

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American race relations looked to be on the upturn today after President Donald Trump responded to the calls from Congress to condemn white supremacists...

National holiday declared as USA goes 6 days without mass shooting

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This is the closest to a full week that the US has gone without a mass shooting since 'The Great Week of Peace' in...

Gun reform fever sweeps America after social media backing for ELC mandatory insurance bill

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After millions of tweets by gun lobbyists, alt righters and other winners at life, Congress has responded with draft gun reform proposals. Some...
Hurricane

State of emergency declared as Hurricane Dorian heads towards rich white people

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Category 4 hurricane 'Dorian' has caused devastation throughout the Bahamas this week. The hurricane has broken previous records of longest sustained category 5 status and...

When the world Trumps, you better dodge that draft

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Look at him. He’s the lad you thought was a prick at school but you still went round his house because he had a decent back garden for you to leck footy in. Except he was shit at it, and had right bad hayfever.

Bands line up to celebrate Trump’s impeachment

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The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal the star studded line up already in place for celebrating the impeachment of Donald Trump, expected to take...

Conspiracy theorists concerned nobody might be in charge after all

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American conspiracy theorists heads are exploding at an alarming rate as the two main presidential candidates get more and more terrible. "Up until yesterday I was...
Donald Trump has a gold leaf living room yet tells the government he doesn't pay tax because you would waste it

Man with solid gold living room tells government “I don’t pay tax because you...

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A man who owns a solid gold living room reportedly told one hundred million of his closest friends that he doesn't pay Tax in...

Elon Musk offers POTUS a ticket to ride his rocket

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Sources close to the White House have revealed that Elon Musk has today offered Donald Trump a ride on the next Falcon Heavy rocket. The...

Latin America overdoses on Irony as CIA complains Russia rigged US election

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Thousands of people are feared dead in Central and Latin America this week after literally laughing their heads off at the news that the...

Election Was Rigged Claims Trump – Recount Demanded

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Donald Trump has sensationally claimed that the 2016 US Presidential Election was rigged and he is demanding a recount.

Trump Spokesman Revealed As Black Knight

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The Herald can exclusively reveal today that the Trump campaign aide, Michael Cohen, is the mysterious Black Knight.   The secretive warrior and guard to stuff...

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