Sport

A Burnley fan who threw a pound coin at Joe Hart is on the run from Police today after authorities claim he is now the new legal owner of Burnley Football Club. The coin missed...

Racquetball superstar Andy Murray today spoke of how his charisma-free personality brings all the girls to his yard. Murray, whose public speaking manner is so mind-numbingly tedious that renowned impressionist Alastair MacGowan famously fell asleep...

The editorial team were said to be jubilant at the news this evening that former England, Leeds and Manchester City centre forward David White was following us on Twitter. They were a little bit disappointed...

Daily Mail readers have insisted that Dressage individual gold medalist Charlotte Dujardin is renamed Charlie Gardner as her name has been deemed "too French" for a post Brexit team GB. Echoing the move which has...

Merkin-topped braggart and presidential candidate Donald Trump is demanding that extreme vetting become an accepted Olympic sport. Although media have interpreted his remarks on extreme vetting as a call for immigration control on brown people,...

Finals Weekend at The Championships in Wimbledon is fast approaching and that can only mean one thing…the eagerly awaited 2017 Sexist Gaffes list from John Inverdale. Inverdale, the 59 year old and formerly respected sports...

Just hours after the Norwegian football association ruled that female footballer's pay must be brought in line with that of the men's, the entire Norwegian national women's squad has been discovered in a debauched...

As the Olympic curling competition reaches its 14th straight day, Russian athlete Alexander Krushelnitsky has tested positive for the stimulant RedBull and been banished from the games. As viewers all over the world struggle...

It has been crowned the greatest sporting achievement at the London Stadium since the 2012 Olympics. There was shock and surprise as a West Ham United fan ran 50 yards on the London Stadium pitch,...

Britain's next Prime Minister is guaranteed to be female but what most people don't know yet is that only one of the contenders will come out of the leadership battle alive. Sources claim that the...

The world of sport was outraged yesterday when Team USA was accused of cheating at the Rock, Paper, Scissors Test Match. If the result stands, the outcome could be devastating for the home side. The bi-annual...

Carwyn Jones has changed his mind on Welsh Independence after Gareth Bale’s new contract doubled the GDP of Wales.

Mexico - The Mexican Olympic Games committee have revealed that their biggest prospect of a gold medal in two years time at the 2020 Tokyo games lies in a recently discovered pole vaulter discovered...

POTATUS, Donald Trump telephoned and congratulated Rochdale AFC on winning the Superbowl on Sunday night. Much to the surprise of club officials. A club spokesman said, "The Chairman was catching up on Love Island when...

Top cycling teams have been paying tribute to the man who provides fresh urine to high profile Tour de France riders for drugs tests. Chopper Raleigh said, "It's always nice to be recognised. Not everyone...