Politics

Experts have announced that irony is dead. The announcement came after a UKIP MEP said that Britain would be plunged back to the early 1900's should Jeremy Corbyn be elected Prime Minister. A spokesman for...

Tory Chief Whip, Francis Gavin Urquhart Williamson, has advised the parliamentary Conservative party during a closed meeting that the beatings will continue until morale improves. Devlin Halfrun, a junior minister in the Dept for Getting...

Following his seizure of the Irony Throne, Donald Trump has moved quickly to form his Small Hands Council.

A senior Brexiter has demanded that all of York’s white roses should be repainted as classic red and white Tudor roses for the sake of national unity. The call from the Lancastrian businessman comes as...

The United States Federal Communications Commission (FCC) will be confiscating all copies of George Orwell’s novel 1984 and burning all copies of Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451, as part of the Trump administration’s request.  According to the administration, local...

President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the neck and face instead. “Melania hates the taste of my goodly...

Following Theresa May's unsurprising announcement of a snap general election, Jeremy Corbyn has made a press statement. Stood in front of a dozen media representatives he said; "We at the Labour party are celebrating this news; half of...

In the wake of the recent cyber-attacks on parliament, we have learned a lot. For starters, the reason Theresa May keeps saying “strong and stable” - it’s not merely her soundbite of choice, she...

The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke. The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci, has not just carried on where Sean Spicer left off,...

Conservative leadership candidate hopeful Andrea Leadsom was remaining tight lipped this morning following revelations that she has 'pulled a u-ey' over the recent referendum that hinged around turkeys. Unless you've been living in a cave...

The Conservatives hope to boost the number of young people applying for party membership by offering them a free Wham Bar every time they visit their local food bank, according to a new proposal. The...

The Government announced today that, after a long and thorough review of the workings of the Electoral Commission, they have added it to the watchlist of subversive organisations. The "Enemies List" as it is known...

Sir Nigel Farage surprised many in the realm this morning when he put his newly acquired knighthood up for sale on eBay. "I was going to just take it down to cash converters." Sir Nigel...

Today the government announced the controversial plan to tax all cat owners by making cat licenses mandatory. The move could bring a much needed £89 billion in revenue from single middle aged women alone, with...

Rochdale financial expert and three times bankrupt Brexit economist Ivana Sendham-Bach claimed today that the announcement that the UK was about to enter a recession was not connected to the EU referendum results. "I know...

Protesters smashed windows and turned violent in Oregon and a few other places last night. “Trump is anti-democratic!” yelled the crowd protesting against the man who recently won an election, “And his hair is shit!” Jesse...