Tim Farron to star in 2017 remake of Sophie’s Choice
Universal Pictures have announced this week that they will be remaking the 1982 Academy Award winning classic Sophie's Choice with Tim Farron in the lead role made famous by Meryl Streep.
Diane Abbott To Play Nigel Farage In Brexit The Movie
In a surprising turn, it has just been announced that a movie of Brexit is to be made and the part of Nigel Farage is...
Ant or Dec to present Saturday Night Takeaway without Ant or Dec
Ant or Dec is going to present ITV's Saturday Night Takeaway on his or his own for the rest of this series, it has...
Stevie Wonder just chooses to be blind, says Kanye West
Batshit crazy US rapper Kanye West has said that the Stevie Wonder’s blindness may be a “choice.”
Thunderbird puppet with condom over his head to play Michael Gove in Brexit Movie
Beating off a host of A-listers, producers have today announced that the starring role of Michael Gove in their upcoming blockbuster has gone to...
BBC in new accusations of bias
Following the release of a teaser for the upcoming Star Wars VIII documentary film, the BBC has been accused of heavy bias towards the...
I’m not homophobic, you’re just a filthy sinner! says singer
It's alright to be a judgey bigoted fuck if it's based on Bronze Age superstition, singer Kim Burrell is insisting.
Being a Liberal Democrat is not a sin claims Elton John
The ageing singer and renowned diva famous for her tantrums, Mariah Carey, asked Elton John about his views on the struggling political party at...
Pete Tong devastated after career ending snaps revealed
Pete Tong was said to be devastated this morning after learning that his career as a top international DJ is effectively over.
The former Radio...
Stranger Things shit declares post millennial generation
Self obsessed cockwomble, Sebastian Tristrum, 14, said "It's crap. I put down my iPhone for a bit and tried to watch it but nothing...
Pressure grows for superhero movie with strong male lead
Following the box office success of ‘Wonder Woman’ pressure is growing for a Hollywood studio to finally make a superhero movie with a strong...
Record Turnout for Britain First in Rochdale for The Zestra Three
Chaotic scenes in Rochdale today as tens of thousands of Britain First supporters and other moderate right wing organisations including Pegida, the EDL and...
“One walk a day more than enough” say The Proclaimers
Following Prime Minister Boris Johnson's announcement that the UK is now in a state of national emergency and that citizens are only permitted to...
Exclusive! Keith Richards talks about 2016
A bright New Year's Day and I am sitting in the fashionable Chelsea bistro 'Hereafter' waiting for Keef, as I know him, to arrive.
Amazingly,...
Rochdale man kicked off Great British Menu
Local high fat enthusiast and walking cardiac arrest Wayne Bucket who inexplicably made it to the finals of Great British Menu, has been voted...
