Paul Hollywood found dead after ‘eating himself’

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Master baker, Paul Hollywood's human remains were found a few hours ago in a Premier Inn in Clitheroe. "All that was left was his right...

Tom Hiddleston does a runner.

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Tom Hiddleston, the one and only attractive ginger man in the world, has scarpered after news broke today that his relationship with Taylor Swift...
Game of Thrones

Cabinet to watch Game of Thrones to pick up tips on killing each other

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Theresa May has reportedly ordered her cabinet, and junior ministers, to watch Game of Thrones in order to get better at killing one another. This...

Couldn’t organise a piss up at a brewery now Couldn’t open an envelope at...

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People bored with ways of describing the gross ineptitude they see around them on a daily basis in work, in the media, in government and politics...

Crystal Maze to return as literally no ideas left

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The Crystal Maze is set to return our screens, again; "The barrel has no bottom. There's nothing left to scrape anymore. This is it." Said...

Fifty Shades Of Grey to become the government’s new race relations manual

1
We’ve all heard the expression about not judging a book by its cover, but one of the most notorious books of the current decade...

Dave Grohl invites Jeremy Corbyn to front a reformed Nirvana

22
Foo Fighters frontman Dave Grohl has invited Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn to front a planned reformation of his former band Nirvana. Speaking to...
Meal or No Meal

Noel Edmonds widely criticised for presenting North Korean game show Meal or No Meal

22
Noel Edmonds has denied allegations that he is due to present a North Korean take on Deal or no Deal called, Meal or no...
Nun Fanny Nicentite

Local Nun in record attempt to raise the roof

A local Nun from Sacred Heart Church in Rochdale could soon become famous for a world record attempt if, with the help of The...
Union flag with "Brexit" ove it

Breadxit: The Great British Taken Off

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Love productions, the company behind mindless dirge The Great British Bake Off, has said its show will no longer appear on the BBC after...

Mary, Mel and Sue to present new slapstick kids tv show ‘The Cackle...

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The trio who recently opted out of any future appearances on Great British Bake Off after its acquisition by Channel 4 announced the news...
Farage

Right wing nutjob calls right wing nutjob a right wing nutjob

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Leading members of the Right Wing Nutjobs Association have been flinging accusations around willy-nilly to the amusement of 'leftie libtards' everywhere. Right wing nutjob...

Parents across the country prepare to encourage their kids to defy them

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Yes, it's that time of the year again, the nights are drawing in, there's a chill in the air and knob heads can't wait...
Golden eagle

Birds of Prey sue rock band the Eagles

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In a landmark case the popular American rock band The Eagles are being sued by a flock of birds for use of the band's...

Writers of Brexit admit they’ve no idea how to end it and it’s going...

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The writers behind the hit show, Brexit say they've no idea how to end the show and there are fears it could turn into...

Stranger Things shit declares post millennial generation

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Self obsessed cockwomble, Sebastian Tristrum, 14, said "It's crap. I put down my iPhone for a bit and tried to watch it but nothing...

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