Teresa May in Dogging Scandal
This seemed to be the headline that the Daily Mirror were fruitlessly alluding to in their article about a condom found in some woods...
Man behind Anonymous turns out to be 13 year old boy from Rochdale
Fans of computer hacker extrordinaires and Internet fighters for justice, Anonymous, will be feeling very let down today with the news that the mastermind...
God bothering Stephen Fry to be stoned to death for blasphemy, the pure gobshite
Stephen Fry has been summoned to appear in the Irish Courts to face the charge of breaching the Irish Defamation Act.
It comes after the...
Black Cops to shoot unarmed white civilians in controversial Charlotte anti-racism plan
Charlotte Police Department have unveiled a controversial yet utterly foolproof plan to combat claims that their police force is institutionally racist.
They're going to let...
Rochdale trolley collector quits job, anaesthetises pigeon and cuts off let to pursue career...
A Rochdale man has today spoken exclusively to the Herald about his short-lived career as a pirate.
Captain Lidl Beard had been working as a...
Teenager with first name ‘Giggs’ finally, inevitably, murders his father.
Giggs Johnson (17) was found guilty of murdering his father at Rochdale Court yesterday. In an unusual move the foreman of the jury addressed...
Inside the Dark Underbelly of Kensington: Salad Dealers
Our Herald undercover reporter uncovers the sinister side of the illegal Kensington salad trade.
It’s 2 a.m. and I’m standing outside an all-night coffee shop...
‘Fake Sheikh’ Gets 15 Months For Making Obscene Phone Calls
Undercover Herald reporter Bazzer McNood has been sentenced to 15 months (suspended) plus a 20 hour Community Service Order for making lewd and obscene nuisance phone...
Daily Mail Editor sectioned after being confused by photograph of white terrorist
The Editor of The Daily Mail was carried out of Northcliffe House in a straitjacket this morning after a photograph of a white man...
Donald Trump arrested for vandalism after smashing own star
News broke a short while ago that Donald Trump's celebrity star had been smashed to bits on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
A Mexican man...
Government hires Daily Mail readers to beef up security strategy
Downing Street has announced plans to employ Daily Mail readers as a team of specialist civilian advisers as it steps up efforts to improve...
EDL firebombs PC World in Rochdale town centre
The computer superstore PC World, this morning lies in tatters as a pile of smouldering rubble following a devastating attack last night.
The trouble began...
Ronald McDonald found dead close to his home
The beloved obesity peddler Ronald McDonald was found dead in the street in the early hours of this morning. The cause of death is...
Study finds people with pixelated faces 70% more likely to commit crime
A study carried out by some of the country's top criminologists has highlighted a surprising correlation between people with pixelated faces and a predisposition...
Archbishop Welby kicks shit out of Nigel Farage following Twitter spat
Archbishop Welby is currently helping police with their enquiries in Westminster after allegedly kerb stomping Nigel Farage.
Peter McCallister found dead after triggering booby trap
Peter McCallister, has been found dead at the foot of his stairs within his home 671 Lincoln Avenue, Winnetka, Illinois.
The Police are treating the...



















































