Rising crime and falling numbers of police are incredible coincidence, insists Downing Street
Rising crime rates and the falling numbers of policemen on the streets are just an amazing coincidence and are in no way related, sources...
Dyslexic holocaust denier accused of being anti-semantic
"It's them Joos again!" exclaimed Noel Iteracy. "I hate Joos, except Orange Juice, they was a good band, but Big Country was huge twats...
Teenager with first name ‘Giggs’ finally, inevitably, murders his father.
Giggs Johnson (17) was found guilty of murdering his father at Rochdale Court yesterday. In an unusual move the foreman of the jury addressed...
Donald Trump arrested for vandalism after smashing own star
News broke a short while ago that Donald Trump's celebrity star had been smashed to bits on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
A Mexican man...
Stereotyping men now a hate crime: Rochdale cracks down on Misandry
Several women were arrested this morning following a verbal altercation outside Rochdale's women's institute.The women who can't be named for legal reasons are being...
US police to swear allegiance directly to Trump and be called the Orange Shirts
In a bold new democracy-busting move, Emperor Trump has decreed the police will now swear an oath of allegiance directly to the person of...
Interflora agent admits to killing Lady Di in deathbed confession shock
Alleged deathbed confession implicates both floral delivery service and royal family in assassination plot
In a shock announcement that has been doing the rounds on...
Unmasked – The Real Jack the Ripper
The question of the identity of the serial killer known as ‘The Whitechapel Murderer’, ‘Leather Apron’ or, most famously Jack the Ripper has been...
Police advise public to ‘grow up’ over rise in clown related call outs
Police call handlers up and down the country have been inundated with calls from concerned citizens in relation to a bizzare new craze in...
Banks Punish Entrepreneurs For Brexit
Our Finance and Business correspondent, Scott Zsalt, was livid today after failing to get support from a major bank due to the fallout from...
Archbishop Welby kicks shit out of Nigel Farage following Twitter spat
Archbishop Welby is currently helping police with their enquiries in Westminster after allegedly kerb stomping Nigel Farage.
Police call time on sex pests
Paedophile sex pests across England and Wales are to be fitted with bells, in a new scheme announced by the police today.
The new devices...
Teresa May in Dogging Scandal
This seemed to be the headline that the Daily Mirror were fruitlessly alluding to in their article about a condom found in some woods...
Rochdale man caught speeding forced to sell kidney to pay fine
Plumber, John Thomason of Norden was caught doing 42 on Edenfield Road, which has a limit of 40 on that stretch. He has been fined...
Mass shootings ‘fact of life’ says only country where mass shootings happen
Ralph H. Ick, head of the Texas branch of the NRA made the shocking statement yesterday after seven children were slain and three were...
Not all men, say men
Men would like you to know that the thing a man just did, just isn't something they would do
Following a recent incident where a...
