Calling bullies bullies is bullying say bullies
Support groups representing bullies are calling for the term bully to be banned.
They claim it is a negative and pejorative phrase and leaves...
Inner city youths escape prison for dogfighting by wearing red jackets and calling people...
Inner-city police are warning of the rise of a brutal new "sport" among the working classes, a savage, twisted parody of the fine ancient...
Daily Mail issue apology for calling white mosque shooter a terrorist
There was chaos in The Daily Mail Newsroom this morning as they scrambled to reset copy before going to press after the gunman who...
Put a bloody jumper on if you’re cold we’re not made of money, Philip...
“Put a jumper on and stop fiddling with the blasted thermostat, I just got it right. If you’re that blinking cold go and walk some of those wretched dogs you insist on keeping. And I’m not talking about the Fergie's sprogs!”
Earthquake rescue workers reassured that Wales is fine, it’s supposed to look like that
Earthquake rescue teams from around the globe were told to stand down today after they descended en masse on Neath in South Wales following...
Turkey escapes Christmas by identifying as a golden eagle.
A turkey on a Norfolk farm has been spared slaughter after claiming to identify as a majestic bird of prey.
"Once I found a tin...
New royal baby to be called Mohammed and raised gender neutral
The Duchess of Sussex Megan Markle has today given birth to a healthy child after a quick labour.
Prince Harry is reported as delighted, as...
Couple looking forward to annual tedious night out, in dreadful nightclub with hideous people
A middle aged Rochdale couple are reportedly giddy with excitement about their annual tedious night out in a horrible club with hideous people tonight.
Barbara...
Royal baby has already earned more than you
The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have left hospital after increasing the burden on the taxpayer for a third time.
The new prince, who was...
Stonehenge to be knocked down to make way for new Super-Mosque
Details leaked from an article due to be published in the Daily Mail show plans to bulldoze the famous neolithic landmark to make way...
Druids “fecking knackered” after moving Stonehenge an hour forward
With the season now officially spring, clocks up and down the nations have been moved forward one hour to adjust to British Summer Time;...
Blitz spirit redefined as refusing to get off bus because somebody has a milkshake
Nigel Farage has confirmed that when he or his party talk of 'the Blitz spirit' he is referring to the act of cowering on...
Northern woman puts heating on
A woman from the North of England has shocked the country by putting the heating on in October.
Denise Dufite, originally from the northern town...
Brexiteer skydiving team dies in tragic accident after replacing parachutes with optimism
An entire elderly skydiving display team has died in a tragic accident in Essex this weekend after replacing their parachutes with an optimistic attitude.
The...
It’s the will of the people – Jaguar Land Rover tells redundant employees
Jaguar Land Rover has told employees that by making them redundant they are carrying out the will of the British people.
Employee Bill Board told...
Premier Inn to change all the locks tonight
Every Premier Inn in the country is changing their locks tonight, whilst Lenny Henry hosts Red Nose Day on the BBC.
Mr. Henry was the...
