Local News

Experts tracking down rogue dog owners in Rochdale came up with the shocking news that prehistoric species are alive and kicking. What's more, the anachronistic creatures have been tracked down. A small nest of the...

A woman whose cats regularly rape strangers in bushes on nights out has insisted that her cats are like her children. Part time hairdresser Barbara Dickinson, 42 and a bit, insists that there is literally...

The nation was in shock this afternoon after rumours began circulating that Ed Miliband had done something useful somewhere up North. "It can't be true." Maureen Liphook of Middleton Labour NEC told The Herald. "He's...

Terry Thomas, 33, a south London real estate agent, is aware every single one of his clients wants to fire him. Mr Thomas has been working for his current agency, Imcomp & Tense, on a...

A Rochdale man who failed GCSE Science has revealed he's an expert on pediatrics and specializes in treatments for Pneumonia. Bill Board loudly announced his expertise to surprised family members this morning over a...

Barmy Council Imposes Blanket Blakey Ban Rochdale Metropolitan Borough Council have imposed a blanket ban on Segs, the popular metal footwear protector, following complaints from the janitorial team concerning damage caused to the newly laid parquet flooring...

Albert Froom was declared the winner of the Brown Vest yesterday after winning his fourth Tour De Rochdale. The famous bicycle race starts at The Duckworth Arms in Ramsbottom and ends The Bay Horse in...

Racists up and down the country have been shocked to learn that certain Arabic words like “Allah” and “Halal” actually translate into regular English words. The fact that Arabic is simply a foreign language, while...

Fears that the Killer Clown Scare had found its way from the United States to Rochdale have been given a custard pie in the face today. Headteacher of Wiggingbottom Primary school in Rochdale had to...

Your neighbour has confirmed he won’t be parking his car in his drive. He believes that the role of his drive is to provide an optimum diagonal route between his front door and his gate...

The Rochdale branch of the English Defence League face fresh controversy this week after an embarrassing mishap at the annual members Halloween party. "We've had some bad press recently and the annual Halloween fancy dress...

Fans of Rochdale songstress Lisa Stansfield will be pleased to hear that her latest release, the eighth album from the evergreen pop sensation, is out on Monday on Polydor Records. 'Flogging A Dead Horse' is an affectionate...

Rochdale Council are to consider a plan to colour snow to make it more representative of the cultural mix of the area. The Rochdale Multi-Cultural Planning Group have put forward the idea because they are worried...

A smug father of two from Bolton has taken the plaudits of his close friends and family as he managed to pack away all the Christmas shop into the family medium sized fridge/freezer combo...

Malcolm, an inner city border collie, has spoken exclusively to the Rochdale Herald and explained he does not understand why the children in his home are constantly rewarded with food. “The kids are a pain...

The children of Fascists have been conveying their excitement at there only being 6 more sleeps until poppy day. 7 year old Bill Board said, "Poppy day is my favourite day of the year. I...