Border collie describes his life as a series of trials

0
Malcolm, an inner city border collie, has spoken exclusively to the Rochdale Herald and explained he does not understand why the children in his...

Elderly Leave voter mistakes Hovis advert for childhood memories

30
An elderly leave voter has been telling the Herald about his childhood and it's very similar to the Hovis advert. Roy Bader, 72, who's never...

It’s a muffin say experts ending the debate once and for all

0
An argument over the name of a baked bread product that is traditionally cut in twain and filled with goodness like chips, bacon or...

Unnamed Rochdale MP to be charged with being drunk in charge of a mobility...

An as yet unnamed MP for Rochdale has allegedly been arrested for being drunk in charge of a mobility scooter. Police were called in the...

GMP Rochdale Plan Devolving Police Powers

0
A plan to devolve police powers in Rochdale has been given the green light. This will be the biggest shakeup in policing since since...
Woman and Cat

My cats are like my children, says woman whose cat raped stranger in bush...

A woman whose cats regularly rape strangers in bushes on nights out has insisted that her cats are like her children. Part time hairdresser Barbara...

Wife suspects husband of having an affair with his shed

10
A wife has begun to suspect her husband of having an affair with his shed. “He was the most doting husband when we first married,”...

Pause in Sheffield tree felling as South Yorkshire Police launch raids on public trumpeters

0
Following the recent arrest of a woman for playing a toy trumpet at a tree felling site, and the resultant revelation that trumpeting in...

Pretentious Burnley couple having a thanksgiving dinner can’t understand why nobody’s coming

0
A Rochdale family have been telling The Rochdale Herald how a Burnley couple have invited them to Thanksgiving dinner tonight. Professor Frederick Seddon of Rochdale...

Attenborough spotted in Rochdale as folk turn primitive

0
Residents of Rochdale coming to terms with the swear ban are having to learn how to communicate from scratch. Restricted from their usual expletive fuelled...

Salem trial lawyer says he’ll never work no win no fee in village again

0
“I’m very upset. This doesn’t seem fair. I did hours on this nonsense.” Rooster added. “I’d say my earnings went up in smoke, only that wouldn't be accurate, as they hung my clients, all nineteen of them. The bums.”

World hunger solved after Jeremy Corbyn urinates on field

0
World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale. One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...

Rochdale trolley collector quits job, anaesthetises pigeon and cuts off let to pursue career...

0
A Rochdale man has today spoken exclusively to the Herald about his short-lived career as a pirate. Captain Lidl Beard had been working as a...

Brexit Deal Threatens Iconic Rochdale Signpost

2
One of Rochdale's most iconic landmarks, the Welcome to Rochdale; Arsehole of Europe' signpost, has come under threat as Britain gears up for leaving...

Breakfast means breakfast as new café opens in Rochdale

0
The Breakfast Club Café offers a selection of options, including a Hard-Boiled Breakfast and a Red, White and Blue Breakfast. We spoke to proprietors Frankie 'Chubz'...

Rochdale woman in Waitrose platitude tragedy

A Rochdale woman was left devastated today after discovering that she will now be looking after her neighbour's children for the next three Sunday...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts