Sheffield Council misunderstand the word ‘Socialist’
Sheffield council yesterday accepted they had fundamentally misunderstood the concept of 'socialism'.
Following a vehement rejection by local residents of their plan to cut down...
Smug Husband packs Christmas shop into fridge
A smug father of two from Bolton has taken the plaudits of his close friends and family as he managed to pack away all...
Paul Simon to redo one of his biggest hits in tribute to ex EDL...
In a world exclusive, The Rochdale Herald can reveal that super succesful singer songwriter, Paul Simon, is working on a rewrite of the hit...
EU kebab ban receives chilli reception in Burnley
The EU move to ban phosphates in donner kebabs has sent a shockwave through the British culinary world.
Keith Braithwaite, local restaurateur and winner of...
Local man feels a right twat after putting his back out in the gym
Local man Steve Dickinson (39 and a half) put his back out this morning in the gym whilst trying to get fit for a...
PC gone mad as hunchback becomes King of England
The whole show is at stake if this political correctness is allowed to go on with no thought to the feelings of traditionalists like myself. Next they’ll be naming bloody carparks after him.
Woman in critical condition after Ocado delivery goes right
A Rochdale woman was said to be in a stable condition after being rushed to Rochdale Infirmary this morning. An ambulance was called to...
Danczuk Less Popular than standing in dog shit
Here at the Herald we've seen numerous "news" sources state that Britain's answer to Donald Trump has considerable support amongst Labour Party members. We somehow...
Homeless Bloke says Stop buying me McDonald’s, I’m homeless not f***ing desperate
A homeless Rochdale man has been telling the Herald about how he's fed up of virtue signalling people only buying him McDonald's meals.
David Wild...
Man pretending to understand the wine list
A man is trying his very hardest to look like he understands the wine list in a restaurant.
Steve Dickinson was handed the wine list...
Burnley Nativity Play cancelled after search for 3 wise men and virgin ends in...
Burnley Council has been forced to cancel its annual community Nativity Play for the 126th consecutive year in succession.
After another exhaustive search of the...
Archbishops To Sue Builders Over Health and Safety Gone Mad
A group of five Archbishops of Canterbury are to sue the building firm Klumsi 'n Fook.
Klumsi 'n Fook, were carrying out renovation works on...
It’s a Global Thing, insists Brexit economist
Rochdale financial expert and three times bankrupt Brexit economist Ivana Sendham-Bach claimed today that the announcement that the UK was about to enter a...
GMP Rochdale Plan Devolving Police Powers
A plan to devolve police powers in Rochdale has been given the green light. This will be the biggest shakeup in policing since since...
Satirists give masterclass in social media relations.
It seems that our writers are on form today. One of our articles has apparently upset a section of our readers more than usual,...
Couple still at bottle bank
A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.




















































