Burnley Nativity Play cancelled after search for 3 wise men and virgin ends in...

0
Burnley Council has been forced to cancel its annual community Nativity Play for the 126th consecutive year in succession. After another exhaustive search of the...
bbq

Twat ruins barbecue with guitar

Reports are coming in that a twat has ruined a perfectly serviceable barbecue after finding an old guitar next to a sofa in the...

War of the Roses: The Rematch

1
Rochdalians reacted with righteous fury over news of what is seen at best as an aggressive land grab and, at worst, a declaration of...

Man arrested masturbating outside Primark not Simon Danczuk

2
Rumours were circulating around the editorial bunker yesterday that the man arrested for masturbating outside of Primark was local pornography enthusiast Simon Danczuk. Despite getting...

UK’s 2nd most popular boys name is currently Boaty McBoatface

0
Latest figures released on the governments website www.gov.co.uk reveal the good old British sense of humour is alive and well as almost unbelievably Boaty...

Middle aged man pulls off the double denim look

0
A middle aged man from Halifax has done the impossible and pulled off the double denim look. Glenn Clarke, 53, from Bury in Lancashire, a...

Woman shocked everything is fine after being told everything will be fine

0
A Rochdale woman was surprised to learn that everything was fine despite being told by her husband "it'll be fine" 400 times a day...

Rochdale Man breaks record for Most Conspiracies Believed

7
Local man, Kelvin Pastie, 31, an unemployed something or the other, believes he is one of the only people in the world to believe...
Fission Chips

There’s a bloke works in our chip shop and he swears he’s Kim Jong...

1
A Rochdale fish and chip shop owner has been telling us how one of his employees is convinced he Kim Jong Un. Ray Fry told...
Dog Shitting in Car

Police free distressed dog left in locked car in Burnley carpark

0
POLICE were forced to smash the window of a locked car parked outside Asda in order release a distressed dog inside the vehicle on...
steak pie

Burnley Analytica implicated in Pie Market fixing scandal

The highly influential research and strategy group, Burnley Analytica, have been accused of unfairly influencing the, multi-pound Northern Pie Market. An undercover investigation, by Baked...
Newborn Baby

Baby carefully planning most inconvenient moment to shit himself

A newborn baby is deliberately planning the most inconvenient time to either shit himself or start screaming for no reason. Lancashire-born newborn dickhead Barry Dickinson...
Fooded river

Rochdale River Opening Big Mistake

0
Council bosses stumbled across some architectural documents relating to the newly uncovered River Roach in the town centre on Tuesday. Deep in the bowels of...

Nation in shock as use finally found for Ed Miliband

The nation was in shock this afternoon after rumours began circulating that Ed Miliband had done something useful somewhere up North. "It can't be true."...

Rochdale man finds his keys in the first place he looks

In an incredible turn of events a local Rochdale man found his keys in the first place he looked for them this afternoon. Steve Dickinson,...

Estate agent knows you want to fire him

0
Terry Thomas, 33, a south London real estate agent, is aware every single one of his clients wants to fire him. Mr Thomas has been...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts