Rochdale – Labour NEC “Can’t find its arse with both hands”
In the face of the least popular Tory Government since the Peterloo Massacre, Labour has decided not to bother being an opposition of any...
Playground craze leads Burnley kids to discover deodorant
Hundreds of Burnley schoolchildren are now aware of the existence of deodorant thanks to the recent playground craze.
The craze involves spraying deodorant from a...
Rochdale UKIP councillor demands best of three for Re-Referendum
Following the announcement that Labour leadership challenger Owen Smith has promised to hold a second referendum on Brexit if he topples Jeremy Corbyn in the upcoming...
Woman in critical condition after Ocado delivery goes right
A Rochdale woman was said to be in a stable condition after being rushed to Rochdale Infirmary this morning. An ambulance was called to...
Rochdale Twin Towns To Be Replaced Post-Brexit
In line with the decision taken by the government that following the UK's departure from the EU, British towns will no longer be allowed...
Theresa May to communicate Brexit deal using dance
Theresa May will communicate the UK's Brexit plan to the House of Commons later today using the medium of dance.
One insider told us, "The...
Rochdale Residents excited at house price rises in Post-Apocalypse Britain
Rochdale residents are said to be very excited by the prospect of house price rises for the first time in almost a century in...
Rochdale Online to give Danczuk day off
In a miraculous change of heart Rochdale Online has decided to give the suspended MP Simon Danczuk a break. Editor Sandra Simonhater said "He...
War of the Roses: The Rematch
Rochdalians reacted with righteous fury over news of what is seen at best as an aggressive land grab and, at worst, a declaration of...
Poll reveals public wants good old fashioned political sex scandal
A Herald survey reveals that public perception of politicians lean towards disappointment at them not having any juicy sex scandals anymore.
Carried out at the...
Woman shocked everything is fine after being told everything will be fine
A Rochdale woman was surprised to learn that everything was fine despite being told by her husband "it'll be fine" 400 times a day...
There’s a bloke works in our chip shop and he swears he’s Kim Jong...
A Rochdale fish and chip shop owner has been telling us how one of his employees is convinced he Kim Jong Un.
Ray Fry told...
Harvey Weinstein is a Democrat is the new Hitler was a Vegetarian
Hip new fashy fashion hits Brownhill School
All the coolest kids in Brownhill School, Rochdale, have adopted it. “Yeah well, Harvey Weinstein was a Democrat so...
Rochdale Herald attempts to break world record for the longest newspaper headline ever ends...
All at the Herald are devastated said Doris the tea lady.
Apology after nativity bites in Rochdale
A church in Rochdale has issued an apology and removed two donkeys from it's nativity scene following an incident yesterday involving one of the...
Couple still at bottle bank
A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.
