Rochdale Herald Editor Re-admitted to Hospital

0
Herald editor, Quentin D. Fortesqueue has been re-admitted to Rochdale General Hospital for surgery to remove his tongue from his cheek. The jaded and cynical...

First Burnley resident to complete 40 minute mile dies at 29

0
The Rochdale Herald is sad to report that the first Burnley resident to complete the 40 minute mile has died aged 29. Bill Board completed...

Yeovil MP threatens local Mum with legal action over Facebook page

0
Fop haired twat and Yeovil MP Marcus "doesn't respond to emails" Fysh has become embroiled in a freedom of speech row on Twitter and...

Man buying surprise ironing board for wife’s birthday asks what colour she wants –...

0
A Rochdale man has explained what happened when, on a whim, he decided to buy his wife an ironing board for her birthday and...

Paul Simon to redo one of his biggest hits in tribute to ex EDL...

2
In a world exclusive, The Rochdale Herald can reveal that super succesful singer songwriter, Paul Simon, is working on a rewrite of the hit...

Rochdale council to trial bi-monthly bin collections

Rochdale Council's Refuse Planner, Frederick West, made the announcement on the council's Facebook page last week. "Since the resounding success of our bi-weekly refuse collections...
knitting

16 Dead In Rochdale Women’s Institute Needle Exchange Hep B Outbreak

0
The Department of Health have launched an inquiry into an outbreak of Hepatitis B at a Rochdale WI knitting needle swap scheme after untreated...
Socks and a tie on Rochdale man's Christmas list

Socks and a tie on Rochdale man’s Christmas list

0
Rochdale resident Steve Dickinson is hoping for unusual Christmas presents from his wife Barbara this year.  "I'm running really low on socks, so some of...
Hideous Bathroom Suite

Couple decide not to get new bathroom after all

9
A couple from Middleton have decided not to get a new bathroom suite after reading in The Daily Mash about a couple who decided...

Rochdale UKIP councillor demands best of three for  Re-Referendum

0
Following the announcement that Labour leadership challenger Owen Smith has promised to hold a second referendum on Brexit if he topples Jeremy Corbyn in the upcoming...

Woman in critical condition after Ocado delivery goes right

0
A Rochdale woman was said to be in a stable condition after being rushed to Rochdale Infirmary this morning. An ambulance was called to...

Rochdale’s Indian Youth Bemoan Lack of “English” Takeaways

0
Rochdale's Indian youth have complained that there is a distinct lack of  late night 'English' takeaway food available in the town. "You know what it's...
House Price

Rochdale Residents excited at house price rises in Post-Apocalypse Britain

Rochdale residents are said to be very excited by the prospect of house price rises for the first time in almost a century in...

Industrial Action Threatened as British Workers Jobs at Threat in Languages Row

Reports that several British workers have had their employment terminated from the world famous British sofa manufacturer Zestra, because they failed to learn Polish...
Fission Chips

There’s a bloke works in our chip shop and he swears he’s Kim Jong...

1
A Rochdale fish and chip shop owner has been telling us how one of his employees is convinced he Kim Jong Un. Ray Fry told...

Unnamed Rochdale MP to be charged with being drunk in charge of a mobility...

An as yet unnamed MP for Rochdale has allegedly been arrested for being drunk in charge of a mobility scooter. Police were called in the...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts