Australian PM Turnbull Reaffirms his Compassionate Commitment to Offshore Detention

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Last night’s Four Corners program on asylum seekers held on Nauru, elicited an angry response from the Nauruan government, who accused the ABC of racism.

Trump loses grip on reality, demands to be new Dr Who.

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US President Donald Trump has called on the BBC to appoint him as the new Dr Who. In a series of tweets at 3am this...
Michael Gove

Gove calls for post-Brexit legalisation of cannibalism

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Former Tory minister and leading Brexit campaigner Michael Gove has called on the government to slash EU regulations on cannibalism which he claims have...

Monkey spanking decriminalised in Italy

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A man known only as Pietro L was charged with a public disorder offence earlier this year after being caught choking his chorizo on...

Americans horrified to learn what the word ‘amendment’ means

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As hillbillies, rednecks and evangelical Christian right wing crackpots continue to celebrate the last thrashings of America's hold on reality with their ongoing support...

US WWII veterans arrested after Trump bans anti-fascists

In extraordinary scenes the US Secret Service have rounded up and imprisoned several second world war veterans after Donald Trump announced the banning of...
face palm

Turkey uses remaining irony reserves after vote to abolish democracy

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The official Turkish news agency (prop. R. T. Erdogan) reports that in a historic vote on Sunday, the people of Turkey voted overwhelmingly in...

Trump to celebrate Father’s Day by bathing in the tears of abducted child immigrants

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US President Donald Trump is to celebrate his second Father's Day in the White House by having a bath filled with the tears of...
Dictionary entry for word "definition"

Trump defuses “alt facts” row by appointing Humpty Dumpty as Secretary of State for...

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US President Donald Trump today moved to defuse the smouldering row over the 'alternative facts' presented by his media counsellor Kellyanne Conway, by appointing fictional Alice-Through-the-Looking-Glass...
Hugh Hefner

Playboy Bunnies surprised to find Hugh Hefner stiffer than usual

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Notorious Bachelor and soft core pornographer Hugh Hefner was pronounced dead this morning at his home, the Playboy Mansion, Los Angeles. Early reports indicate that...
Donald Trump

Half of Trump Supporters Gullible Obese Idiots and the other Half deplorable Racist A-holes...

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In the wake of the "scandal" surrounding Hillary Clinton's comments describing half of Trump supporters as a "basket of deplorables", The Rochdale Herald commissioned...
Time Magazine

Trump joins Time Magazine “Person of the Year” club

In a move in keeping with the utter shit show that has been 2016, Time Magazine has named the orange baboon Donald Trump "Person...

Racism cured after white people put black face on their social media accounts

We are pleased to report that racial prejudice worldwide has been solved by white people blacking up their social media accounts.  From your mum's...

All guns to be armed with guns

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...
Donald Trump

Bloke who fancies his daughter lies about woman marrying her brother

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A bloke who wants to shag his daughter has suggested that a top US politician should be investigated for marrying her brother. Incest enthusiast and...

ISIS claim responsibility for Windows 10 update

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ISIS have released a statement taking responsibility for the latest Windows 10 update. The religious group released a statement today saying, "The recent major update of...

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