Civilised countries don’t gas civilians, they shoot them with AR-15s bought over counter at...
The US has told a UN Security Council meeting that the recent chemical attack on Syria is completely unacceptable.
Responding to reports of an incident...
Trump defuses “alt facts” row by appointing Humpty Dumpty as Secretary of State for...
US President Donald Trump today moved to defuse the smouldering row over the 'alternative facts' presented by his media counsellor Kellyanne Conway, by appointing fictional Alice-Through-the-Looking-Glass...
Aliens land on earth, demand under no circumstances to be taken to our leaders
It has been confirmed that aliens have landed on earth over the festive period. Their large red craft, powered by nine outlying vaguely reindeer-shaped...
NASA announce Kellyanne Conway is not of this world
NASA has announced it will hold a press conference later this week to reveal new discoveries "of significant importance, "beyond our solar system".
The agency...
Trump joins Time Magazine “Person of the Year” club
In a move in keeping with the utter shit show that has been 2016, Time Magazine has named the orange baboon Donald Trump "Person...
Trump Replaces White House With Blimp
President Donald Trump took to the skies over Washington today in a giant, orange blimp.
The President is believed to have made the decision...
Donald Trump tweets that he was going to be asked to marry Harry but...
Donald Trump has sensationally tweeted that Prince Harry was going to ask him to marry him.
POTUS explained on social media yesterday that he...
US police to swear allegiance directly to Trump and be called the Orange Shirts
In a bold new democracy-busting move, Emperor Trump has decreed the police will now swear an oath of allegiance directly to the person of...
Trump makes it compulsory to carry guns in US
President Donald Trump has apparently just signed a new executive order making it compulsory for American citizens to carry guns about them at all...
Outrage as Trump BBQ ruins White House lawn
White House officials were said to be furious today after Trump supporters burned a cross on the South Lawn last night.
The BBQ, which was...
Mary forced to give birth on stable floor after health insurance refuses to cover...
A woman that claims she's about to give birth to the son of God has told the Herald, about how she is being forced...
Nuttall Claims Best Actor At Oscars
Armenian born British Actor Constantine Felangi, better known by his stage name of Paul Nuttall, seized the coveted golden statue for Best Actor at...
KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump
In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
World shocked Thailand torturing political prisoners
The world was rocked to the core today after an Amnesty International report revealed that Thailand's military junta, otherwise known as "the government", tortures...
Putin to sing ‘This land is my land’ at Eurovision tonight
Russia today announced suprise plans to enter the Eurovision song contest tonight. The Russian entry is to be sung by Vladimir Putin and is entitled "This
land...
