Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’
Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight...
We need buoyancy aids not Beyonce aid, say Houston flood victims
Residents of Houston were bemused by an offer from pop star Beyonce offering help for those affected by the recent flooding.
“We asked for buoyancy...
Trump launches intercontinental Tweet at North Korea
POTUS and orange spacehopper Donald Trump has reacted angrily to the first North Korean missile test since he took office.
The massive and overwhelming response...
UN convene emergency meeting over Ant and Dec crisis
The UN is to convene an extraordinary meeting in Geneva later today to discuss the situation following events which unfolded in the UK recently.
The...
North Korean media reports North Korea has won the World Cup
North Korea has won the World Cup despite not qualifying for the tournament. At least that's what the north Korean media has said today.
North...
Trump says he misspoke when he said Stalin was an excellent strong leader
Donald Trump has said that he misspoke when he described Joseph Stalin as an excellent strong leader.
Trump was replying to reporters who sought clarification...
Farage Demands Second French Presidential Election
Nigel Farage has claimed the victory of Macron over Le Pen of 65% v 35% is scandalous. Just inappropriate. Undemocratic. Pathetic.
"Fifty two to forty...
Canada recognises the Alamo as capital of Mexico
Donald Trump has given a calm and measured response to news that Canada intends to move it's Mexican embassy to the Alamo.
Just kidding. Trump...
Dinosaurs deny existence of meteorite impact assessment
The dinosaurs today issued a statement in response to the challenge that they release their assessment on what would happen if the planet was...
Melania Trump is nothing like Eva Braun, she didn’t get tits out for money...
Sean Spicer has put his foot in mouth again today by accidentally drawing comparisons between Hitler's wife, Eva Braun, and the First Lady, Melania...
Sponsorship deal agreed for new Emirates Notre Dame Cathedral
Following the destruction of popular prayer centre Notre Dame Cathedral, the Pope and President Macron jointly announced today that the gothic edifice would be...
Trump appoints David Duke to head Black Lives Don’t Matter initiative
Dr David Duke, former Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan, Senate hopeful and all American Nazi Screwball, has accepted President Elect Donald Trump’s offer of a key advisory role in his new government.
Salisbury poisoning suspect revealed to be elderly arcade owner from Scooby Doo
A man who is suspected of poisoning Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal has had his real identity revealed by a group calling itself Mystery...
Jeremy Corbyn reveals plan to become Iranian Ayatollah
In a surprising announcement, Jeremy Corbyn has said he plans to become Ayatollah in a bid to replace Ayatollah Ali Khamenei in Iran.
A spokesman...
Trump Introduces 2020 Presidential Campaign Mascot
President Trump took to the stage in Nuremberg, Florida, on Saturday in front of a crowd seen from space, to unveil his mascot for...
US Professor Seeks European Expertise to Erase 5 Years History from Text Books
The Head of History Faculty at Harvard University is to tour European institutions to discover the best ways to whitewash 5 years of history...

















































