Aleppo Children launch crowdfunding campaign to replace Kim Kardashian jewellery
Children in Aleppo have called for an official Day of Mourning as they grieve in solidarity with the Kardashian family for the loss of...
Trump hails record amount of pussy to grab in the House of Representatives
Donald Trump has spoken of how great it is that there's now so much pussy to grab when he next visits the House of...
Pakistani woman sentenced to death for insulting Harry Potter
A woman in Pakistan has been sentenced to death for insulting the fictional character, Harry Potter.
The woman's lawyer told us, "This woman deeply insulted Harry Potter...
Mass shootings are an unsolvable problem says country with a mass shootings problem
A country that has a really serious problem with deranged lunatics buying really big guns and shooting dozens of strangers has publicly said it...
Tower Block residents look forward to less health and safety legislation post Brexit
A recent survey of tenants living in firetrap and substandard accommodation has showed overwhelming support for abolishing laws designed to protect them.
The survey for...
The Middle East starts packing as Blair hints at return to politics
The Oxford English definition of irony, former Middle East Peace Envoy, Tony Blair, suggested a political return may be on the cards in a...
Trump condemns dead soldier for not standing during national anthem
President Donald Trump has rebuked allegations of inappropriate comments made by the grieving widow of a US soldier today by pointing out her husband...
College Professor assaults Trump supporter
A college professor in the US has come under fire from leading figures in the Republican Party after he allegedly assaulted a number of...
Vladimir Putin Secures Another Term At The White House
Russian President, Vladimir Putin, won a landslide victory in last night's election which securing his place as leader of the USA.
As predicted, Putin secured...
Trump’s cognitive ability is normal, says White House vet
WASHINGTON: The actual real-life US President Donald Trump has achieved a normal score on a cognitive exam and is in excellent fettle, although he...
Trump gives a shot in the arm to 2020 Darwin Awards
President Donald Trump has thrown an unexpected and much appreciated lifeline to the 2020 Darwin Awards.
The well-known website which describes itself as a "salute...
Swiper named as Map Safety Ambassador by UN
The World Health Organization (WHO) has appointed Swiper, the thieving rodent, as a "map safety ambassador" to help tackle dangerous map use.
New WHO head...
England ready for Adelaide Ashes Test
Ahead of the second Ashes Test which has just started in Adelaide, England captain Joe Root sought to defuse the simmering tension between the...
Thoughts and prayers shortages in US reaching crisis point
Shortages of thoughts and prayers for the victims of gun violence is said to be reaching crisis point this morning with many dead people...
UN tells Goodwill Ambassador to fuck off
After a record low of zero days in the job, the new UN Ambassador, whose job it would've been to generally spread love and...
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...


















































