Trump Admits ‘I’d Actually Prefer Snowden To Farage’
President-elect Donald Trump revealed today that although he had expressed a preference for Nigel Farage as UK ambassador to the USA, this was a...
World “back on track” after Dutch non-Nazi gets 20% of the vote
World leaders have rushed to hail the Dutch general election as the turning point in the history of civilisation. With the rising tide of...
French Head of Military resigns after Macron cuts £1bn from White Flag Budget
General Pierre de Villiers today sensationally quit as Head of the French Military in a row over cuts to the French White Flag budget.
General...
Tony Montana to become new White House communications director
Tony Montana is set to become White House communications director following the sacking of Anthony Scaramucci today.
Mr Montana was last seen toting M16A1 guns...
US Closes Wardrobe Border Travel Bans on Narnians and Radical Followers of Aslan
President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order immediately banning "followers of Aslan" from entering the US.
This will instantly affect talking beavers, centaurs...
Chernobyl rejects proposal to twin towns with Rochdale
The Ukrainian town of Chernobyl has rejected a proposal to twin with Rochdale, a spokesman for Rochdale council confirmed to the Herald.
The town...
‘News media so fake’ says perma-tanned, toupee-wearing septuagenarian
The world's favourite orange leader has been ranting about his pet hate once again. The issue of so-called “Fake news” is now well within...
Donald Trump arrested for vandalism after smashing own star
News broke a short while ago that Donald Trump's celebrity star had been smashed to bits on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
A Mexican man...
Anonymous declare war on ISIS for 4657th time.
The group Anonymous have today declared war on ISIS for the 4657th time.
A spokesman for the group said, "ISIS should prepare for a fate...
Spicer denies Flynn worked as National Security Advisor, Trump demands Flynn’s birth certificate
The Trump administration has attempted to erase any indication that Michael Flynn, a retired U.S. General and former National Security Advisor for the administration, worked in...
Trump: tinfoil a good defence against mind control rays
President-elect Donald J Trump has announced a groundbreaking and cutting edge technology to combat the growing menace of conspiracies facing the US.
He is well...
ISIS claim responsibility for self-service checkouts
So called 'Islamic State' have claimed responsibility for supermarket self service checkouts.
A statement released by ISIS said they came up with the idea after...
Trump to introduce Hunger Games-style immigration policy
The matter of immigration has often been a contentious issue within politics, particularly American politics of late. During the campaign trail, Donald Trump promised...
Rothschilds ‘surprised’ at Trump victory but pleased in investment in US wall building company
The Rothschild family are set for a huge windfall following Donald Trump's 'surprise' success in the US election.
Angela Merkel to meet Theresa May to tell her to fuck off in person
Following historic meetings with world leaders such as Carwyn Jones and Nicola Sturgeon during her first week as British Prime Minister Theresa is set...
Christmas moved to November 12th
Theresa May's government yesterday announced plans to move Christmas forward this year to November the 12th, just in case we don't all reach December.
The...
