Scotch and Revolver sales jump 30,000% during Trump’s inaugural speech
Scotch Whiskey and revolver salesman all over the world are in buoyant mood this afternoon after a huge windfall sales extravaganza during President Trump's inaugural address.
North Korean media reports North Korea has won the World Cup
North Korea has won the World Cup despite not qualifying for the tournament. At least that's what the north Korean media has said today.
North...
He knew what he signed up for, says dickhead who doesn’t know what he...
Proving once and for all that sometimes the best thing to say is nothing, Donald Trump told the widow of a grieving soldier that...
Dinosaurs deny existence of meteorite impact assessment
The dinosaurs today issued a statement in response to the challenge that they release their assessment on what would happen if the planet was...
Donald Trump shits on White House floor after learning Obama uses toilets
News is emerging this morning that Donald Trump has started defecating on the floor like a dog after learning that Barack Obama uses toilets.
Several...
How about the right not to die at school, ask US school children
In the wake of yet another devastating school shooting on U.S soil, American school goers have stood up to demand an amendment to the...
US WWII veterans arrested after Trump bans anti-fascists
In extraordinary scenes the US Secret Service have rounded up and imprisoned several second world war veterans after Donald Trump announced the banning of...
The Middle East starts packing as Blair hints at return to politics
The Oxford English definition of irony, former Middle East Peace Envoy, Tony Blair, suggested a political return may be on the cards in a...
IRS look forward to “getting to the bottom” of Trump’s Federal Income Tax “I’m...
Surgical glove manufacturer Sphinctoraw Inc got a surprise order for 110,000 pairs of elbow length surgical gloves from the IRS.
The order was placed...
Trump and Putin fail to beat each other in two hour long rock, paper,...
Presidents Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin met face to face for the first time in public yesterday and went for each other in a...
Half of Trump Supporters Gullible Obese Idiots and the other Half deplorable Racist A-holes...
In the wake of the "scandal" surrounding Hillary Clinton's comments describing half of Trump supporters as a "basket of deplorables", The Rochdale Herald commissioned...
Australia’s Immigration Minister calls for tougher toughness
Peter Dutton, Australia’s Immigration Minister, launched a scathing attack on Australia’s business leaders following their public support for the legalisation of gay marriage.
Heads of...
Turkish referendum definitely not rigged, says head of the Turkish Electoral Commission Recep Erdogan
The Head of the Turkish Electoral Commission has put to rest rumours of vote rigging in Sunday's referendum to give almost unlimited powers to...
Am I Mexican? Ask Trump voters after he says USA will pay for Wall
The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation...
Trump nominates Bill Cosby for US Supreme Court
Bill Cosby has been elected to the US Supreme Court after being sentenced for sex assault.
Cosby, who today received a 10 year sentence for...
Emergency services called after Bob Geldof disappears up his own arse
Two fire engines along with police and ambulance crews were called to the centre of Dublin after reports came in that a man had...
