America

Residents of Houston were bemused by an offer from pop star Beyonce offering help for those affected by the recent flooding. “We asked for buoyancy aids so that we could keep ourselves and our pets...

In an unpresidented turn of events, one of Donald Trump's tweets was proven to be correct today after Shit Hair Magazine declared him person of the year. In previous years, the much sought after accolade...

Donald Trump has sensationally claimed that the 2016 US Presidential Election was rigged and he is demanding a recount.

Lawyers for the actual President of the United States of America are seeking $20 million in damages from a porn star who he says broke a confidentiality agreement about an affair he claims not...

A full size model of Donald Trump used for "selfies" by visitors to a museum has been removed by popular demand. Pictures shared all over social media show people posing with the statue of the...

Donald 'The Toddler' Trump was said to be upset this morning after the hashtag DumbDonald began trending on Twitter. The Toddler is running for the President of the United States but this week managed to...

In a move in keeping with the utter shit show that has been 2016, Time Magazine has named the orange baboon Donald Trump "Person of the Year". Other notable recipients of the award include Adolf...

When it was pointed out to them exactly where America lay on the map, many of them seemed disappointed that it wasn’t the whole of North America from Mexico upwards.

The White House Head of IT has expressed his heightened concern that the Presidency could be heading for a critical outage. Head of IT Maurice Moss explained his concern today that White House bandwidth has...

POTATUS has announced that if all the trees in California were cut down then there would be no forest fires. POTATUS got the idea after discovering that there are no forest fires in Antartica. In...

‘Rumours that Donald Trump described his legions of supporters as "obese trailer park trash" and "uneducated fucking idiots" are yet to be confirmed.

The new President's controversial Muslim ban has caused outrage across the globe and chaos in airports all across the US. Last night thousands of protesters gathered in central Manchester, joining many others in major cities...

In the aftermath of the shocking shooting of children and teachers in a Florida High School, Americans have been quick to point out there clearly is a gun shortage right across the land of...

Donald Trump has vowed to track down and sue all of his victims after the presidential elections.

Sources within the Trump administration have downplayed rumours that Russian diplomat Sergei Lavrov is in the running to become the next Director of the FBI. Lavrov, who was appointed Russia’s Foreign Minister in 2004, is...

The Secret Service and senior members of the National Security Council have taken drastic steps to toughen US Nuclear launch protocols during Donald Trump's presidency by replacing the Nuclear Football with 1979 Speak and Spell.