Toymaker confesses he made Melania Trump to keep Pinocchio company

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A Tuscan toymaker has ended days of speculation by confessing he made a new female doll to keep his infamous, lying, long nosed boy...
Harvey Weinstein

Harvey Weinstein one step closer to presidency after filing for bankruptcy

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The New York studio co-founded by disgraced film producer Harvey Weinstein is to file for bankruptcy, in a move sure to put him a...

Kavanaugh to celebrate Supreme Court confirmation with White House keg party

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Newly-appointed Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh will celebrate his confirmation later today by throwing a massive kegger at the White House, sources have confirmed.   Kavanaugh, whose nomination...
Time Magazine

Trump towers above the little people for TIME magazine

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President-elect of the USA Donald J Trump has been named “Person Of The Year” by TIME magazine which referred to its own nation as...

Trump gives world a ‘pearl necklace’ as withdrawal does not stop emissions

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President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the...

Light spectroscopy confirms Trump wears a toupee and it’s 70% alpaca

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Donald Trump's hair is partly fake, and the fake part is not even human hair, but alpaca, scientists working for NASA's Astronomical spectroscopy division...
Elephants

NRA claims that fewer elephants would be shot by hunters if more of them...

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The National Rifle Association has today put out a statement claiming that fewer African elephants would fall victim to big game hunters if they...

Oh for F**k’s sake – say world leaders following Trump nomination

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Leaders around the world let out a simultaneous sigh of despair last night as the Republican Party confirmed Donald Trump's presidential nomination. In yet another...

All Homosexuals should be stoned, says Mike Pence

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Vice President of the US, Mike Pence, has finally come out - with a statement that may shock many Republicans. President Trump joked a year...

CIA to dumb down intelligence briefings

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The U.S. Director of National Intelligence (DNI) Dan Coats, announced on Sunday that they will be cutting down the president’s daily intelligence briefings to a maximum...

Trump barred from White House toilets

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President Donald Trump has been the first victim of his cancellation of orders compelling universities and other institutions to respect personal identity. Although rescinding the orders was...
Baby

Adolf tops list of most popular baby names for boys in USA in 2017

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For the first time in almost fifty years the name Adolf is topping the lists for most popular baby names in the United States...

I wouldn’t rape a fat woman, I have standards – says Trump

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Thousands of Republican voters suffered serious head injuries yesterday after face palming themselves really hard during a Trump Rally.
Imortan Joe with Trump's face

Mad Max: Fury Road found to be future documentary sent back as a warning

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"Mad Max:Fury Road" has been found to be a future documentary, sent back as a warning. The documentary, originally titled 'Trump's Legacy' was hastily thrown...

Trump’s Wall to be Made Out of Thoughts and Prayers

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The latest twist in the ongoing farcical shitshow that is the US President's attempt to build an completely pointless wall simply because he said...

America To Be Renamed Trumptopia

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Donald Trump has announced a new step in his plan to make America great again - he's renaming it after himself. In a press conference,...

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