Riot

Three dead on final day of Poundworld closing down sale

0
Questions are being raised following the trampling of three shoppers in riots on the final day of opening of Poundworld at Sheffield Heeley Retail...
Riot Police

Police called after man without tattoo spotted in Rochdale town centre

26
There was a commotion on Drake Street in Rochdale this afternoon as crowds of people gathered from all corners of the town to gaze...

Northerner brings Kraft Slices to cheese and wine party in Surrey

0
A disgraced Northerner has been barred from ever returning to the South, after he humiliated his sister at a bourgeoisie Cheese & Wine evening...
Range Rover

It’s the will of the people – Jaguar Land Rover tells redundant employees

0
Jaguar Land Rover has told employees that by making them redundant they are carrying out the will of the British people. Employee Bill Board told...
Boris Johnson

Women in Burkhas look ridiculous, says man who looks like an overweight mop

0
Boris Johnson has once again found himself under fire due to comments he made likening women who wear Burqas and Niqabs in appearance to...

Florence and Dougal quit UK over Brexit fears

0
In a shock move, Magic Roundabout stars Florence and Dougal have announced they are quitting the UK to move back to their native France...
Letterbox

Boris Johnson looks like a c*nt, say letterboxes

0
Letterboxes around the UK have stood by their remarks about the Boris Johnson after the Post Office chairman asked them to apologise. There is broad...
Rees Mogg

You lost get over it, Jacob Rees-Mogg told

0
Jacob Rees-Mogg has been told to get over losing the no confidence vote in Theresa May last night. Mr Rees-Mogg heads the European Research Group...

Southern Rail Timetable wins Man Booker Prize for fiction

0
The visionary author of Southern Rail's timetable, Bernard Jones, has been announced as the seventh winner of the Man Booker International Prize for fiction. The...
Conservative Party

ISIS claim responsibility for Conservative Party Conference

29
The attackers wrote Boris’s jokes, Theresa May’s speech and arranged for all the letters to fall off the wall behind the Prime Minister during her main conference address in an audacious display of comic timing.

Just 126 sleeps until Xmas, says cat

0
A local cat, Elvis Snoogums, has spoken of his excitement as Christmas gets ever closer. Speaking exclusively to the Rochdale Herald Elvis told us, "Soon...
Wrapping Presents

I’ve already wrapped all my Christmas presents, say terrifying psychopaths

0
Terrifying psychopaths around the country have taken time out from planning murders and disembowelling their neighbour's pets to tell The Rochdale Herald that they...

UK disqualified from piss up in a brewery world championship

0
After the snap, crackle and pop election called by Theresa May has resulted in a hung parliament, it's clear that the repercussions reach further...
Paul Nuttall

Britain’s oldest man, Paul Nuttall, has died.

0
Sir Paul Nuttall, VC, OBE, Ph.D, passed away peacefully in his sleep yesterday, hours before his 108th birthday. Sir Paul was the first man to...
FBI

There was nothing to tip us off about that bloke who bought 33 guns...

1
The FBI have reiterated that there were absolutely no clues that a bloke who bought thirty three semi-automatic rifles in one year might have...

Nigel Farage to replace David Dimbleby as host of BBC’s Question Time

0
The BBC have confirmed that Nigel Farage is to replace David Dimbleby as the host of its topical debate programme Question Time. It is understood...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts