IT department confirms that turning Maybot off and on again didn’t work

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The latest attempt to reboot the Downing Street operating system failed after the Tory party IT department tried turning Maybot off and on again. Nigel...
fox cubs

Corbyn supports hunting with dogs repeal in Government manifesto

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Jeremy Corbyn has pledged to support the Conservative Party's promise to repeal the fox hunting ban. This appears to be the result of him mishearing...

Ringmaster May’s Brexit circus will tour till 2021 unless David Davis gets eaten

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It was announced last Friday that Ringmaster may’s Brexit circus will attempt to extend its world record breaking tour of Europe until 2021 unless...
Boris Johnson

Asda Self-service checkout till beats Boris Johnson at Scrabble

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Scientists from Rochdale College have developed an artificially intelligent self service till that beat Boris Johnson at Scrabble.  Dr Frederick Seddon said, "We were wanting...
Rees Mogg

Height supremacists promise New World Order will be with us shortly

9
Growing support for alt-height movement Height Supremacists have a new doyen in the shape of Sixtus Rees-Mogg. Rees-Mogg initially attracted support with a very modern...
Science Class

DUP pushes to rename school classes in ‘Science’ as ‘Magic’

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There has been a legion of support for the move though, as it would spark pupil’s interest in the subject of science again.

Nigel Farage to become the fourth Mrs. Donald Trump

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The ‘Special Relationship’ between the United States and Britain is likely to get a lot stronger thanks to the efforts of Nigel Farage. He is to become the fourth Mrs. Donald Trump.

Idiot turns on News and now can’t sleep

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A man in Lancashire this evening accidentally turned on his television this evening to see Donald Trump leading Hillary Clinton in the polls in North Carolina and now definitely won't sleep.

Lib Dems form armed wing in desperate bid to remain relevant

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The Liberal Democrats have announced the creation of an ‘armed wing’ in what commentators are interpreting as a last ditch attempt to have some...

Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs

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Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets. The move comes after...

Branson to be Stripped of Knighthood & Awarded “The Icepick of the People” in...

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John McDonnell has branded British capitalist lapdog Sir Richard Branson an "enemy of the People" who "undermines Democracy & the Will of the People"...

Trump wears tinfoil hat to stop Obama hearing his thoughts…

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President Donald J. Trump has come up with an ingenious solution to prevent Obama from ‘spying on his thoughts’. He now wears a tinfoil...
Theresa May

Theresa May – the facts

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Theresa May - the facts She is planning to get Hello magazine to do an exclusive of her luxury life in No 10 2. She...

Farron Accepts Offer of Education Secretary As May Offers Anti-Brexit Coaltion

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Tim Farron spoke of his relief this evening as he accepted Theresa May's offer of a coalition government on the condition of an anti-Brexit...

Boris not offensive, simply misunderstood – insists Boris

2
Posh fop-headed press gob and Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson has defended the countless insults and faux pas he has made by claiming that each...

This is your eighty seventh and FINAL warning Corbyn tells Labour MPs

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After 52 of Jeremy Coalbin's unruly red rabble voted against the party whip over the Article 50 vote in parliament, the Labour leader has...

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