Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs
Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets.
The move comes after...
Get fit and beat inflation with subsistence farming and foraging, Top Tory tells poor
Tory ministers are expected to announce a three part plan to tackle obesity and food inflation later this week.
May sets UK up for long March to Brexit
Theresa May’s Conservative government have quite literally meddled with time in their pursuit of successfully completing Brexit according to their timetable.
The Conservative party used their parliamentary...
Shit sandwiches start to taste better after you have swallowed the first bite, David...
Following the Government's success in the Great Repeal Act, Brexit Secretary David Davies has moved to assure Parliament that the lingering taste of this...
Make America Great Again
We keep hearing Donald saying he's going to make America great again, sounds good to us but we were curious to find out when...
Britain First Announces Pact With Lizard People
Britain First, the right-wing political party for twats of all ages, has announced a revolutionary partnership with The Lizard People, a secretive reptilian group of aliens...
Not enough evidence to convict Danczuk of rape says CPS
The Crown Prosecution Service has declined to prosecute Simon "Shagger" Danczuk on the basis that they are not confident they will secure a conviction.
Leamington to become post Brexit English capital
The Warwickshire town of Leamington could become the new English capital following the United Kingdom's departure from the European union, sources close to prime...
‘Everybody in Scunthorpe will lose their jobs’ was on the other side of bus,...
Boris Johnson has taken to social media today to clear up any misunderstanding that the 66% of people who live in Scunthorpe and voted...
Farage to become economic migrant.
Sources close to the MEP, would be ambassador and professional Admiral Ackbar lookalike Nigel Farage, say he is close to moving the the USA.
Apparently...
New UKIP leader elected yesterday already 3rd longest serving leader behind both Nigel Farages
Mr Henry Bolt-on was celebrating tonight after having managed the milestone event of third longest serving UKIP leader, even though he was only elected...
Britain declares national state of Armagammon
An emergency committee has confirmed that Britain faces an unprecedented state of 'Armagammon' today.
One insider told us, "This is the highest state we could be...
Labour to campaign for Liberal Democrats in June 8th General Election
Diane Abbott was resurrected this afternoon to speak to a journalist of sorts, on the BBC.
Ms Abbott used one of her last possible...
Physicist angry that with infinite universes, he got one with Trump in it
A failed physicist and lapsed university lecturer has lamented online about his inner anxieties.
Dirty Politics
Britain's next Prime Minister is guaranteed to be female but what most people don't know yet is that only one of the contenders will...
Donald Trump fails to mention the length of his penis in speech defending western...
Donald Trump left an eager crowd shocked in Poland today when he failed to mention the length of his schlong once during a rousing...
