David Brent to sing Equality Street at Trump Inauguration

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Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.
Nazi Uniforms

Nazi slammed for organising Conservative Party themed stag do

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A member of the Nazi Party at the centre of a controversy over a Conservative Party-themed stag do, is to step down as Obergruppenfuhrer...

Sex worker and fruit picker tops post-Brexit career options

5
According to a press release from the Federated Institution of Associated School Careers Officers, the Brexit Plan simplifies future British employment opportunities to sex work...
Umunna

Paul Nuttall Has Chuka Umunna Running Scared for South London Seat

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Paul Nuttall gave an interview with a surprise this morning on the Today programme on BBC4. Asked if he would satisfy the curiosity of literally...

Corbyn Calls for Alton Towers to be Nationalised as Queues for Rollercoaster hits 2...

0
Waiting for hours for the hope of a seat, crushed up against other in the park, or crouched uncomfortably in the queues is an...
Michael Gove

Michael Gove says – I’m sick of experts, and by experts I mean Canadians...

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Michael Gove has once again hit out at "experts" at The Bank of England.
Theresa May

Theresa May’s Rituals

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"Theresa May is signalling distress." Dr. Maca Damia comments, viewing photos of the Prime Minister kneeling by the road just inside Wales. "Do you see...

Philip Hammond apologises to women on cabinet for making sexist comment at ‘wrong time...

6
Philip Hammond has today apologised for his insensitive remarks about women by buying them all a jolly nice big bar of chocolate and a...

Mugwump? That hoofwanking spangletwat needs to stop spafftrumpeting says Corbyn

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Earlier this morning Boris Johnson MP called Jeremy Corbyn a 'Mutton-headed Mugwump'. Full time buffoon and part time Foreign Secretary is known for his creative language...

Outrage as Trump BBQ ruins White House lawn

6
White House officials were said to be furious today after Trump supporters burned a cross on the South Lawn last night. The BBQ, which was...
Theresa May

Fuck it what’s the worst that can happen Theresa May tells journalists

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Theresa May has dramatically announced the date for triggering Article 50 with a press conference today. Before pressing the big red button that triggers...
Bergxit

Antarctical 50 signed, Bergxit means Bergxit

4
Today an area four times the size of London has broken away from the Antarctic landmass. It is a worrying example of rising sea...

Boris not offensive, simply misunderstood – insists Boris

2
Posh fop-headed press gob and Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson has defended the countless insults and faux pas he has made by claiming that each...
David Cameron

Cameron brings attention to himself to avoid attention being on him

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David Cameron, pig-fiddling, radish-faced ex-PM has decided to step down as an MP. Cameron, who nobody has so much as glanced at in Parliament since...

New Tony Blair character in Cluedo, cannot be accused

12
Exciting news for fans of the classic board game Cluedo as a new character is to be introduced! That character is no other than former...

Brexit a Fucking Shambles, Says John Major

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Former Prime Minister and voice of reason John Major has confirmed in a speech that the ongoing government brexit negotiations are a fucking shambles. Major,...

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