Theresa May is set to meet Carwyn Jones, the First Minister of Wales to reassure him that the needs, plans, hopes and dreams of the Welsh Assembly will continue to be ignored by Westminster.
Wales, which receives almost as much EU funding as fellow Brexit voter fucking Cornwall, voted to leave the EU and now hopes for reassurance from Westminster that funding for things like sports centres, free cinema tickets and bilingual roadsigns will continue as usual. 

An anonymous spokesman for Theresa May told The Herald that; 

“Theresa told Nicola Sturgeon to fuck off last week, it’s only fair that Carwyn, whoever the hell that is, should get one too.” 

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Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.