ISIS withdraw from Iraq after Blair’s return to politics announcement

0
Tony Blair yesterday announced that he intended to fill a massive hole and that after that he'd return to British politics. In an interview he...
Pigs

Brexit Party set for MEP gains. Scientists bring pig brains back from the dead

0
Early opinion polls show a likely overall victory for the Brexit Party in the upcoming European Parliament elections.  Scientists have restored brain activity to...

Communists Confused by Billy No Mates

0
The Far left have found themselves even more confused than normal today after revelations from losing Labour leadership candidate Owen Smith.  The Leninist/Trotskyist group of...
Houses of Parliament

New dress code requires MPs to wear oven gloves in Parliament at all times

0
The UK Parliament's Committee on Standards has announced plans to require all male MPs to wear oven gloves whenever they attend the building. The Committee...

Only 23 days to save historic Christmas Deal, warn turkeys

0
Turkeys have declared that today there are only 23 days to save their historic Christmas deal. They have warned that is vitally important that the...
Downing Street

DUP advises British Gas customers to burn witches and Catholics to keep warm this...

41
Princess Diana's body is to be exhumed and hung on a gibbet outside Buckingham Palace to commemorate the 20th anniversary of the last witch-hunt...
Theresa May

May convinced she needs one more f*cking slogan to convince country to back austerity

13
The Prime Minister is said to be personally convinced another f*cking slogan will convince the entire country to back austerity. Catchphrases repeated to the point...
Protestors

Democratic Democrats protest against anti-democratic democracy

0
Protesters smashed windows and turned violent in Oregon and a few other places last night. “Trump is anti-democratic!” yelled the crowd protesting against the man...

UKIP elects Diane James leader

0
Diane James was elected the leader of UKIP yesterday and has already been causing controversy on account of not being Nigel Farage. People outside of...

Campaign to crowdfund a copy of Bravo Two Zero and box of tissues for...

0
A crowdfunding campaign set up to raise enough money for a copy of Bravo Two Zero and a man size box of tissues for...

EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain

0
The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...

A Christmas Carol reimagined by new Ministry of Truth to promote thrift

0
The iconic Christmas tale has been edited by the new government department to 'instill a sense of fiscal caution' in the nation's youth. The new...

CPS To Charge Corbyn With Electoral Fraud

0
Jeremy Corbyn is to be charged with electoral fraud by the CPS following reports that, although clearly unelectable, he has been winning elections since...

Westminster fury as MPs told six week wait to process expenses claims

1
There were raucous scenes at Westminster yesterday as several MPs were advised that a new system for processing expenses meant a six week wait...

Heath department hails compulsory organ donation as possible way to pay for Brexit

0
Sources inside the Department of Health this evening are said to be excited over the Secretary of State's alleged contribution to the debate about...

Rochdale UKIP councillor demands best of three for  Re-Referendum

0
Following the announcement that Labour leadership challenger Owen Smith has promised to hold a second referendum on Brexit if he topples Jeremy Corbyn in the upcoming...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts