What time is it Mr Woolfe?
Steven Woolfe, a total barrister who serves as a legal adviser to hedge fund managers and bankers narrowly missed his chance to become replacement...
EU condemns punchy politics
After events today the EU has made an announcement about violent behaviour.
Guy Verhofstadt, famous both for having a mouth like a vending machine and...
Overpaid nurses treat Berkshire woman for injuries sustained pruning magic money tree
Medics at all major NHS hospitals in central London are on tenterhooks hoping to be the ones to treat a middle aged woman who...
Prime Minister Hospitalised After Strong and Stable Seizure
Prime Minister Theresa May was rushed to hospital this evening after suffering what is described as a "strong and stable" seizure.
The incident occurred while...
Theresa May wins coveted Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy
Prime minister Theresa May has won the 2017 Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy ahead of stiff competition.
"It was an incredible effort from...
Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs
Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets.
The move comes after...
Farron u-turns and joins coalition after McDonnell says he’ll let him sip his beer
"A coalition? No absolutely not we will not do it" said Tim Farron, earlier today at the Westminster bar.
However, moments later the Liberal Democrat...
Trump restores American faith in Bush
Donald Trump has today been credited with restoring America's faith in Bush.
Dwayne Dwight of Alabama told the Herald "I was big into Bush in...
Patriotic Brexiteer spends £60M on Singapore homes after saving £60M in UK Corporation Tax
Patriotic billionaire Brexiteer, Singapore resident and tax exile James Dyson has just bought a £26M bungalow in Singapore weeks after buying a Penthouse in...
UKIP contains more pricks than Eric Bristow’s dartboard
The political establishment was rocked today when new research conclusively proved that the United Kingdom Independence Party (UKIP) contains more pricks than world famous darts...
Do I still get lunch asks hungry 6 year old
In light of the slim Conservative majority, primary school children up and down the nation awake today uncertain of their future meal prospects.
"Will I...
Donald Trump denies links to Donald Trump Jnr
Donald Trump has denied ever meeting Donald Trump Jr. The denial comes after it was revealed by Trump Jr that he had met Russian Natalia...
Now that passports are blue again I might get one, says 50 year old...
A fifty year old racist fuckwit has told The Rochdale Herald that he is over the moon that passports are now going to be...
Daily Mail Exposed as a False Newspaper
Jonathan Harmswoth, 4th Viscount of Rothermere, controlling shareholder and current chairman of the Daily Mail has finally come clean and admitted that the newspaper...
Government advises British Gas Customers to follow their example and burn bridges for fuel...
Most U.K. bridges are built or stone and iron. This will mean a boom to hardware retailers as Britons rush to stop up on pickaxes and wheelbarrows in order to carry their winter fuel allowance home.
Owen Smith Recognised in Tesco Express
In a massive boost for the right of The Labour Party, Owen Smith was spotted and recognised in a Tesco Express in Camden yesterday....
