Simon Danczuk expected to volunteer as UKIP teenage pussy inspector
"Although I'm a Labour candidate, I'll throw my support behind UKIP and volunteer to inspect teenage girls vaginas." Said local full time pornography enthusiast...
The Australian Federal Opposition has called for a Royal Commission into Royal Commissions
In an extraordinary turn of events in Australia Opposition Immigration Minister Aidan Androyd has declared the "necessity for this Royal Commission."
"Well, I tried to...
Barnier threatens UK leaflet drop to explain Brexit dangers Davis predicts boom days for...
EU chief negotiator Michel Barnier Monday warned that Brussels could take the unusual step of dropping leaflets explaining the dangers of the UK leaving...
London prime ministerial fatberg is too strong and stable to shift
Following the news that a massive lump of fat, plastic and waste material is blocking London's sewer works, the Rochdale Herald spoke to an...
Even Hitler didn’t treat his press secretary as badly as this says Sean Spicer
Sean Spicer has been explaining how badly he has been treated by Donald Trump. Speaking to an assembled press corps Mr Spicer said, "Even...
Hillary Clinton’s ‘Human Suit’ malfunctions at 911 memorial service
The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened...
Britain to hold referendum to decide whether we love or hate Marmite
Referendum fan Nicola Sturgeon has announced plans for a controversial referendum to decide once and for all if Britain loves or hates Marmite.
Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat
There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...
Met Office advise all future storms named Storm Boris until May gets the balls...
The Met Office has released a statement this lunch time advising that all storms to hit the United Kingdom this winter will be named...
FIFA launch investigation into DUP backhander scandal
The Federation of International Football Associations (FIFA), have announced their intention to pursue a full investigation into alleged corruption in British politics, following the...
It’s not a popularity contest, really unpopular MP tells voters
An extremely unpopular MP has just informed voters that the upcoming general election is not a popularity contest.
The MP addressed the crowd and urged...
Poldark overwhelming choice to lead Government of National Unity
Popular TV star, the dark, brooding and enigmatic Ross Poldark has emerged as the main contender to lead a Government of National Unity as...
Top Tories Converse to win yoof vote
Prime Minister Theresa May today ditched her kitten heels and turned out to the Commons wearing a pair of Chuck Taylor black and white...
52% support euthanasia bill
The Government has been urged to hold a referendum on euthanasia following research that showed that 52% of voters would support the introduction of...
Theresa May makes audacious bid for Jorge Mendes to replace David Davis.
With the transfer window now open, Theresa May is expected to make David Davis available for transfer whilst putting in a bid for Jorge...
Brexit bias uncovered in Westminster
After detailed research, leading academics have revealed a list of staunchly pro Brexit MPs and have demanded that the old, rich white people in...
