Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration
There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event.
The demagogue was able to...
One man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter, insists Theresa May
Alarmed by Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn's threat to cross the floor of the House of Commons to challenge for the Tory leadership, Prime Minister...
French PM Tells Boris “Freedom of Movement or Nothing” then Shuts Calais
British holidaymakers and Brexit voters on their way to France had the opportunity to learn what the term "French border control" actually means over...
Extinction Rebellion glue themselves to new Brexit deal
In a disastrous move for Boris Johnson, a member of climate protest group Extinction Rebellion have glued themselves to the newly negotiated Brexit deal.
White,...
Amber Rudd launches investigation into NHS as ‘foreign worker’ stats land
At the Tory Conference earlier today, Miss. Rudd asked all businesses to compile a list of anyone who looks or speaks funny - except...
Voters must provide family coat of arms as ID insists government
The government has been accused of the suppression of voters' rights after plans to introduce compulsory checks of a family coat of arms for...
Get fit and beat inflation with subsistence farming and foraging, Top Tory tells poor
Tory ministers are expected to announce a three part plan to tackle obesity and food inflation later this week.
Monster Raving Looney Party rejects Douglas Carswell for being TOO weird
Having survived a terror attack last Thursday the British parliament has been delivered another shock with the news that the Official Monster Raving Loony...
UK insists EU to have custody of Farage at weekends in Brexit divorce settlement
As part of the Brexit divorce settlement the EU has agreed to have Nigel Farage at weekends.
In exchange for the financial settlement, believed...
Blitz Spirit redefined to mean allowing a foreign Government to choose your ambassador
The Oxford English Dictionary has announced that it is redefining the meaning of Blitz Spirit. The move comes a day after the British Government...
Medical advances meant most students will survive to pay back large debts PM reassures...
The woman pretending to be British Prime Minister is expected to increase her appeal to the younger demographics today. She will do it by...
I don’t mean to brag, I don’t mean to boast, but I destroy fields...
Reinvigorated Prime Minister takes back control; promises strong Tory programme to boost food banking sector
"Listen up you detestable worms, you aren't going to get...
Mike Hookem’s Dad officially bigger than Steven Woolfe’s Dad
Following an altercation in Strasbourg yesterday between two fully grown adult men, Mike Hookem and Steven Wolfe, UKIP released a statement saying;
Tommy Robinson claims full English ruined by brown sauce
Hate preacher Thomas “Tommy” Robinson (not his real name) has become terribly distraught at the presence of brown sauce in traditional English cafes. ...
Theresa May refuses to attend the General Election
After appointing her recently bereaved Home Secretary, Amber Rudd, to take
flack from 'the most left wing audience since a Stalin rally' - Daily Mail,
in...
Outrage as Trump BBQ ruins White House lawn
White House officials were said to be furious today after Trump supporters burned a cross on the South Lawn last night.
The BBQ, which was...
