Crying Man

Irony pronounced dead after UKIP spokesman warns Corbyn Government would ‘take Britain back to...

12
Experts have announced that irony is dead. The announcement came after a UKIP MEP said that Britain would be plunged back to the early...
Houses of Parliament

Government reassures voters post-Brexit ration books will also be blue

0
The government has taken bold steps today to reassure the public after a leaked Whitechapel report detailed how the UK is likely to face...
Rees Mogg

Height supremacists promise New World Order will be with us shortly

9
Growing support for alt-height movement Height Supremacists have a new doyen in the shape of Sixtus Rees-Mogg. Rees-Mogg initially attracted support with a very modern...
nurses

Overpaid nurses treat Berkshire woman for injuries sustained pruning magic money tree

2
Medics at all major NHS hospitals in central London are on tenterhooks hoping to be the ones to treat a middle aged woman who...
Miliband

Ed Miliband Suspended by Labour in Anti-Semitic Bacon Sandwich Shocker

0
Former Labour Leader Ed Miliband has been suspended from the Party after being accused of anti-Semitic breakfast habits. A spokesman for the Labour Party...

Owen Smith has beaten off 1,200 young boys – says Owen Smith

0
Owen Smith has caused another Labour controversy in parliament after beating off hundreds of boys in an attempt to pull his wife. Mr. Smith told...

Woman always repeating “no meal is better than a bad meal” went hungry last...

3
A woman who keeps saying “no meal is better than a bad meal” to the people she’s supposed to have dinner with went hungry...

Prison not a muslamic themed holiday camp after all says Paul Golding

1
Paul Golding, hero of the Free British Peoples and shiny-faced wankpuffin, has told Britain Furst colleagues that it turns out prisons are not "Butlins...
Paul Nuttall

Nuttall pulls out of Stoke by-election

0
NHS hating, pathological liar and leader of UKIP, Paul Nuttall, has today pulled out of the Stoke by-election after it was revealed that his remaining...
Rastafarian

Liberal Democrats secure vital Rastafarian vote

The Liberal Democrats' General Election campaign took a huge step forward this morning after they secured the vital UK Rastafarian vote.

Disastrous mistake warns stopping Brexit would be disastrous mistake

0
A disastrous mistake will warn derailing Brexit will be a disastrous mistake in a speech about a falling over in public later today. In a...
Putin Trump

Trump and Putin secret G20 meeting beyond ‘Netflix and Chill’

0
Reports ejaculating out of Hamburg indicate that the secret meeting between President Trump and Vladimir Putin transcended sharing a duvet and gorging on Hagen-Daaz. The...
Boris Johnson

Boris overheard telling King Felipe of Spain ‘NO GIVO BACKO, CAPICHE’ whilst pointing at...

27
Boris Johnson has unveiled his diplomatic plan to engage with King Felipe and Queen Letizia over Brexit negotiations at a state meal. Johnson told the...

May rains on International Happiness Day with Brexit announcement

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March 20th has long been designated International Happiness Day, a day to celebrate all that is good about life in the 21st century. However there...

Yeovil MP threatens local Mum with legal action over Facebook page

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Fop haired twat and Yeovil MP Marcus "doesn't respond to emails" Fysh has become embroiled in a freedom of speech row on Twitter and...
Mobility Scooter

Study finds brexit civil war would last as long as average mobility scooter battery...

0
A study of mobility scooter battery life has shown that a Brexiteer led civil war would last 9 hours. 6 if the battles were...

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