Heath department hails compulsory organ donation as possible way to pay for Brexit

0
Sources inside the Department of Health this evening are said to be excited over the Secretary of State's alleged contribution to the debate about...

Chances of Patel having job by Christmas looking Priti grim

0
Theresa May's office has commented on the departure from the usual policy of ministers confining themselves to work on behalf of the country, and...

May to offer Britain complete break from Boris Johnson

0
In a last ditch attempt to win the X Factor vote tonight,the PM today took the unusual but popular step to separate Boris Johnson...

Tory sparks by-election because… er…reasons.

0
Former non-dom tax shy billionaire's son and general Tory role model Zac Goldsmith has resigned from his position as a Tory MP after the...

Theresa May makes audacious bid for Jorge Mendes to replace David Davis.

0
With the transfer window now open, Theresa May is expected to make David Davis available for transfer whilst putting in a bid for Jorge...
Ferrero Roche

Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’

0
Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight...
Ann Widdecombe

Humans cured of sexuality after imagining Ann Widdecombe masturbating in the bath

Scientists from Rochdale's Community University have finally managed to find a cure for human sexuality after asking people to imagine Ann Widdecombe fiddling with...

I am truly above the law, confirms giant-toothed, flappy-eared, demon-eyed, shithouse, fuckmonger

4
What’s your favourite type of monger? Picture him: Swooping down from the sky astride a yellowing American Eagle, the political shitehawk persuades his steed to loosen...

Home Office Play Matchmaker for Rochdale’s Bridget Joneses

0
The Rochdale Herald can reveal controversial Home Office plans to settle new male immigrants in areas of Britain with too many single women in...
Umunna

Paul Nuttall Has Chuka Umunna Running Scared for South London Seat

0
Paul Nuttall gave an interview with a surprise this morning on the Today programme on BBC4. Asked if he would satisfy the curiosity of literally...

May to seek permission from Rupert Murdoch to sack Boris Johnson

18
The Rochdale Herald can reveal this afternoon that Theresa May is alleged to have written to British Prime Minister Rupert Murdoch seeking permission to...
Arlene Foster

Relief as Theresa May and Arlene Foster finish scissoring out a deal

6
“It was no time for hammering,” confirmed the Prime Minister, “we had quite enough of a hammering in the election, which we still, I...
Dartboard

UKIP contains more pricks than Eric Bristow’s dartboard

0
The political establishment was rocked today when new research conclusively proved that the United Kingdom Independence Party (UKIP) contains more pricks than world famous darts...
Downing Street

May to ‘Rasta’ it up

0
In a leaked Downing Street memo, it is believed that Prime Minister Theresa May is to reach out to sections of society who feel...

Simon Danczuk delighted to not be the sleaziest MP in a photo

0
Disgraced pornography enthusiast, first class passenger, casual sext pest and Rochdale MP Simon 'Spanker' Danczuk is said to be "absolutely buzzing" that he's not...

Brexit voters furious at a British Court today

0
Brexit voters today were unsure who to be furious at today after a British Court as opposed to a European Court made a decision about the nature of British Parliamentary Sovereignty.

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts