May gives UK schools education 101
Prime Minister Theresa May has heralded education reforms by telling UK schools that there will be "no return to the binary system of the...
Poldark overwhelming choice to lead Government of National Unity
Popular TV star, the dark, brooding and enigmatic Ross Poldark has emerged as the main contender to lead a Government of National Unity as...
Anarchists praise efficiency of German train network as G20 riots start on time
The German city of Hamburg is hosting the 2017 G20 summit in which world leaders come together to discuss and agree on action on...
May announces textile regeneration scheme for the Northern Powerhouse
As the race for the Tory Party Leadership heats up, Teresa May has today announced transformative economic reform plans for the Northern Powerhouse.
The ambitious...
Satirist sues CNN for stealing Trump Headline
The Rochdale Herald has issued a cease and desist letter to CNN after they stole a satirical headline about Donald Trump.
Chris Grayling announces he’s pregnant after taking Covid-19 antibody test
Chris Grayling has revealed he's pregnant after he took the new Covid-19 antibody test.
A spokesman said, "It came as quite a surprise for Chris...
Boris urges Tories to get behind May as it makes it easier to stab...
Boris Johnson has today reprimanded Conservative Party Members for attempting to organise a coup and not asking him to join in. In his message,...
Theresa May sets new record for least informative interview
Theresa May, the first unelected Prime Minister to have deliberately had her hair cut into the shape of a bell end has given an...
Football referees warned not to go against the will of the people
Following criticism of High Court Judges 'interfering' in the Brexit process, the Football Association have decided to get rid of football referees.
"We don't need...
Paul Golding’s Prison-a-thon raises £5,000 for The Refugee Council
On an uncharacteristically serious note we'd like to thank each and every person who has donated or otherwise supported Paul's campaign for The Refugee Council.
Prince Charles admits years of talking to vegetables perfect preparation for Trump visit
Prince Charles has confirmed that years of talking to vegetables at Highgrove are the perfect preparation for meeting Donald Trump today.
There's been a...
Britain faces Sophie’s choice over which incompetent arsehole leads it
Britain has revealed it is spoiled for choice on which incompetent aresehole it has leading it.
A spokesman told us, "Everyone is cheering at the...
We’re all going to die after Brexit, confirms Philip Hammond
Remain voters around the country are said to be absolutely furious to learn that every single person who voted to remain in the European...
Brexiteers Celebrate Scrapping of Human Rights Act
Today The Justice Secretary announced the scrapping of The Human Rights Act as outlined in the Tory Manifesto to a room full of Sith...
UKIP Needs Image Change, Says Rest of UK.
The UK has today agreed with former UKIP leadership challenger Suzanne Evans when she said the party needed an image change. Preferably to a...
Labour reports sophisticated cyberattack after Jeremy Corbyn’s MySpace account is hacked
The Labour Party has announced that it has been the subject of a cyberattack today.
A spokesman told us, "We first became aware of the...
