Dead refugees welcome say Home Office
Refugees will be welcome to Great Britain providing they are dead, under a new scheme announced by the Home Office.
The new measures, expected to...
Child refugees can stay till after they’ve seen NHS Dentist
Teenage child refugees completing their journey to the UK were breathed a huge sigh of relief after being told they could remain in the UK until they could secure an appointment with an NHS Dentist.
I said ‘sack my cook & hold my calls’ says MP accused of sexual...
Embattled Tory MP Mark Garnier claims he was simply misunderstood by his Secretary over recent sex abuse allegations that have rocked Westminster.
Barnier, a...
Donald Trump ends democracy in America
I’ve decided Ivanka will come after me. I mean, she’s hot, and she has my gift with politics, so she’s the perfect choice
Emails found on MP’s pornhub viewer
A forensic investigation of Damian Green's computer has revealed that it was used for viewing emails, conducting research and processing documents, confirming that...
McCartney soils himself in public, again
McCartney has once again made a huge arse of himself in public, this time by taking a shit with his clothes on in the...
Theresa May to rebrand Conservatives as People’s Front of Judea to present united front...
Many alternative names were considered. The United Front of Judean People. This was taken unfortunately by a group lead by David Davis and Sajid Javid. Splitters!
Brexit voters furious at a British Court today
Brexit voters today were unsure who to be furious at today after a British Court as opposed to a European Court made a decision about the nature of British Parliamentary Sovereignty.
Nigel Farage to become the fourth Mrs. Donald Trump
The ‘Special Relationship’ between the United States and Britain is likely to get a lot stronger thanks to the efforts of Nigel Farage. He is to become the fourth Mrs. Donald Trump.
Trump state visit downgraded amid protest fears
It has been announced that President Trump’s forthcoming visit to the UK has been downgraded from a full state visit.
POTUS was invited to meet...
Trump Announces New Cabinet Appointments
Two new appointments have been made to the cabinet of President-Elect Donald Trump.
"Although I know that I will be technically the Commander-In-Chief, people will...
Foreign holiday season likely to be cancelled says Minister for the Bleedin Obvious
Many British people are unlikely to be able to take summer holidays abroad this year says Matt Hancock in a stunning example of the...
Not all Tories are twats, but all twats are Tories, scientists discover
Scientists have discovered that not all Tories are twats, but all twats are Tories.
We all know that Michael Gove is a twat. Even his...
Labour urge supporters to vote Conservative to keep Liberal Democrats out of Power
The Labour Party general election campaign is said to be in tatters today following the release of the Liberal Democrat's Manifesto in the last...
“Go Back to where you came from!” -Say 1970’s
In a shock statement today the 1970's have told 2016 to go back to its own timeline where it belongs.
In July a third of...
Hillary Clinton’s ‘Human Suit’ malfunctions at 911 memorial service
The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened...
