Satan refuses cabinet position in reshuffle

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In a surprising turn of events Satan has declined an offer to join Theresa May's new cabinet saying it would be "damaging" to his reputation.

Theresa May Selective In Button Pressing

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Prime Minister Theresa May briefly excited Brexiters yesterday when she announced she would definitely push the button. As cheers rang out across the nation it...
Denis Skinner

Labour foreign policy just Dennis Skinner with a cricket bat

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Jeremy Corbyn's anti-Trident, peace before war principles have long caused concern amongst critics and fellow MPs. "He'll lie down and let anyone who wants to do...

Farron Accepts Offer of Education Secretary As May Offers Anti-Brexit Coaltion

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Tim Farron spoke of his relief this evening as he accepted Theresa May's offer of a coalition government on the condition of an anti-Brexit...
Tim Farron

Labour urge supporters to vote Conservative to keep Liberal Democrats out of Power

The Labour Party general election campaign is said to be in tatters today following the release of the Liberal Democrat's Manifesto in the last...
iPhone

Losers celebrate election victory

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The winners of the 2017 election are despondent today as they downheartedly celebrate their victory. “Yay. Fandabby bloody dozey,” said Conservative Unionist National Tory Society...

Hammond to tour UK comedy circuit with budget routine

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After recently testing his new material in Parliament, Chancellor Philip Hammond has decided to take his own brand of political comedy "on the road." His...

Theresa May says alcohol and poor judgement to blame for Trump state visit

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Theresa May has been responding to calls to cancel the Trump state visit during a press conference today. Responding to criticism that the invitation for...

Sick Home Sec sacked?

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Home Sec Diane Abbott has been off sick since cancelling her appearance on Woman's Hour yesterday but has she been sacked? Jeremy Corbyn was giving...
Couple with dog

Possible to know same amount about Brexit by trying to hide from it as...

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As you stagger to the bathroom in the morning, arriving before you remember you have knees, and try to get all your strikingly yellow...

Surprise and anger as Boris slips down the ‘worst diplomat ever chart’

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There was consternation in Whitehall this morning as details emerged of several international diplomats who may in fact be much, much worse than Boris...
May and Cameron

Theresa May Attempting To Make David Cameron Look Better In Retrospect

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Theresa May’s goal as Prime Minister is to ensure that people don’t remember David Cameron’s premiership as the worst in history, it has emerged. Speaking...

Public unsure what to believe after Nuttall admits ‘Everything I say is a lie’

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In another reputation-busting move, Paul Nuttall has stumped logicians and shocked the wider world with the classic Liar's or Epimenides Paradox by saying; "Everything I...

Matt Hancock adds Straw Clutching to his cv as “transferable skill”

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Hot on the heels of Boris Johnson's success in the Stable Door Shutting championships, the Health Secratary, Matt Hancock has added Straw Clutching to...
Trump standing at lectern.

I’m President of what? Asks Donald Trump

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After the shock of winning the popularity contest "President Factor", President elect Trump has now talked about his next career move. We asked him...

Boris Johnson books flight home from New York with Thomas Cook

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Downing Street have issued a statement this morning explaining that Boris Johnson won't be able to attend Prime Minister's Questions today because he's stuck...

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