Blitz spirit redefined as refusing to get off bus because somebody has a milkshake

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Nigel Farage has confirmed that when he or his party talk of 'the Blitz spirit' he is referring to the act of cowering on...
We're all going to die

We’re all going to die after Brexit, confirms Philip Hammond

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Remain voters around the country are said to be absolutely furious to learn that every single person who voted to remain in the European...

Brexit Party candidate apologises for not wearing poppy on his Nazi uniform

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Brexit Party candidate Graham Cushway has been forced to issue an apology after being spotted without a Remembrance Day poppy on his Luftwaffe uniform. Mr...

Labour conference advised “Don’t mention the Brexit, I mentioned it once but I think...

0
The Labour Party Conference in Brighton attendees have been advised not to mention the Brexit. They mentioned it once, but they think they got...

Nigel Farage’s reveals apocalyptic Brexit plan involves moving to Germany

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Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) has revealed a Brexit Armageddon plan that involves him relocating to Germany. It's understood that should Britain exit the...

Government reassures that Brexit talk delays are all part of the plan

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Number 10 has today reassured the Rochdale Herald that everything is in good order and that they do, in fact, know what they are...

Brexit Britain won’t be like Mad Max. Mad Max can afford a car

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Independent research carried out by a team of so-called "experts" has backed up a comment made by the Brexit Secretary today. David "What Am I...
David Davis

David Davis replaced as Brexit negotiator by two short planks

21
The government announced this morning that Chief Brexit negotiator David Davis is to be replaced by two short planks. It's believed the replacement of Mr....

We’re not racist we want fewer white Polish faces too, Brexiters tell Vince...

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Brexiters have taken umbrage at Vince Cable's suggestion that they'd like to see more white faces. Cliff Edge, a red man who normally speaks in...

Statistics confirm three kinds of lies; lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s statistics

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UK Statistics Authority have reaffirmed the old adage today that there are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s use of...
Florence

Theresa May to prove in Florence it’s not just British people who don’t listen...

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The British Prime Minister is today at the EU Summit in Florence to give a landmark speech to a 4,000 seat amphitheatre containing one...
David Davis

Picture of Dorian Gray to replace Britain in future relationship with EU

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It's thought the deeper thinking behind moving the picture to the front line of negotiations over the future relationship of Britain and the EU is as a result of the government discovering just how far up a creek they've rowed already.

Foreign words banned from entering English language March 2019

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Foreign words already resident in the native tongue, like Welsh ones, will be allowed to remain after England (and the others) exit the EU.

Brexiteer speaks of shock at discovering Britain is an island

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Brexit Secretary Dominic Raab has been speaking of his discovery that Britain is an island today. Speaking to the media Mr Raaab said, "People have...

Greggs announce Paris as post Brexit Euro trading base and name change to De...

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Food supremo Greggs announced via a Rochdale Herald exclusive today that they have chosen Paris for their post Brexit trading headquarters and will soon...

EU to offer May reproduction of Munch’s The Scream to hang in 10 Downing...

9
The woman who believes she is British Prime Minister is to travel to Florence tomorrow to give a one date stand up performance in...

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