Corbyn vows to walk to Brussels to get best Brexit deal

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Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has vowed that if he becomes Prime Minister he will personally walk to Brussels to demonstrate how serious he is...
Confusion

Labour less popular than Conservatives snap poll reveals

8
Labour voters up and down the country were dismayed to learn that, according to a poll of absolutely everybody with a vote in the...

Tommy Robinson claims full English ruined by brown sauce

67
Hate preacher Thomas “Tommy” Robinson (not his real name) has become terribly distraught at the presence of brown sauce in traditional English cafes. ...

Paul Nuttall denies lying about surviving the sinking of the Titanic

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UKIP leader and MEP Paul Nuttall Sunday issued a stern denial that he had lied about surviving the sinking of the Titanic on April...

Dig for Victory, says Corbyn facing Brexit economic doom

1
Jeremy Corbyn, leader of the opposition and the second coming Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour, has set about his first week back in...

Trump to brave Muslim controlled no go area during UK Visit

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Despite the advice of Fox News commentator, Steven Emerson, advisors to Donald Trump have said that there is a strong possibility that the so-called...

Theresa May: Donald Trump told me to grab EU by the pussy

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Donald Trump told Theresa May that she should "grab the EU by the pussy" rather than ask for its consent, according to an interview...

John McDonnell caught on film pushing Diane Abbott under bus while out jogging

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John McDonell has been embroiled in a bizarre cover up involving himself and Diane Abbot

Stop being rebellious formerly rebellious Labour rebel tells rebellious Labour rebels

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The formerly rebellious Labour rebel, Jeremy Corbyn, has told rebellious Labour rebels to stop being rebellious or else.

Campaign to crowdfund a copy of Bravo Two Zero and box of tissues for...

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A crowdfunding campaign set up to raise enough money for a copy of Bravo Two Zero and a man size box of tissues for...
Prime Numbers

Government Set to Outlaw Prime Numbers

0
In a surprise announcement this morning, it has emerged that the Government has released a White Paper aimed at criminalising the use of prime...
Philip Hammond

Fresh sexism row after Hammond overheard telling Theresa May not to ‘worry her pretty...

0
Philip Hammond was today facing another storm over his casual sexism as it was revealed that his response to the Prime Minister's concerns over...

Idiot turns on News and now can’t sleep

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A man in Lancashire this evening accidentally turned on his television this evening to see Donald Trump leading Hillary Clinton in the polls in North Carolina and now definitely won't sleep.

Jeremy Corbyn appoints his teddy bears and security blanket to cabinet

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The leader of the Labour Party Jeremy Corbyn has just had to give all his friends in the tree-house gang another reprimand. Having failed...

Letter F dies of embarrassment during conference speech

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Paramedics and specialists in typesetting were seen rushing to the site of a terrifying incident at the Conservative Party conference in Manchester earlier in...
Theresa May

Parliament email hack reveals 75% of May’s emails contain phrase “cocking fuck, what fresh...

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Penetration of the heart of government by dodgy Russian hacker types has allowed innovative research. Statistical analysis of the government's emails has been published today...

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