Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat
There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...
Postmen refuse to empty post boxes as ‘there could be anything in there’
Postmen across the country are refusing to open and empty letter boxes after being led to believe they could contain anything including bank robbers...
Obama quietly pleased his G20 riots were bigger than Trump’s
President Barack Obama, who was born in America, is said to be privately pleased the riots at G20 summits he attended were bigger than...
Rats accuse Boris Johnson and David Davis of Cultural Appropriation
Yesterday following a heated meeting over Brexit David Davis and Boris Johnson resigned from their positions as Minister for Brexit and Foreign Secretary respectively.
The...
Badgers vote for cull of Conservative MPs
Radical badgers have declared Dingley Dell an independent sovereign state and have threatened violent action against Conservative MPs in response to the continuing cull.
The...
Boris Johnson shocked to discover British Empire no longer contains Canada
Foreign Office officials have confirmed that Boris Johnson has finally accepted that the British Empire no longer contains Canada, more than a year after...
Britain’s oldest man, Paul Nuttall, has died.
Sir Paul Nuttall, VC, OBE, Ph.D, passed away peacefully in his sleep yesterday, hours before his 108th birthday.
Sir Paul was the first man to...
FIFA launch investigation into DUP backhander scandal
The Federation of International Football Associations (FIFA), have announced their intention to pursue a full investigation into alleged corruption in British politics, following the...
David Davis fails to negotiate corner on way to Brexit talks
Brexit supremo David Davis has suffered a minor road accident when he tried, and failed, to negotiate a corner.
Healthcare professionals were on the scene...
Brexit Party Manifesto a Wetherspoon’s menu with curry crossed out with crayon
The Brexit Party has finally unveiled their much anticipated election manifesto ahead of the EU elections.
To much fanfare the document has been revealed to...
Government announces all heroes to be paid in rounds of applause
Government announces all heroes to be paid in rounds of applause. The first decisive vote in the new session of parliament was passed yesterday...
Theresa May declares ‘sit down session’ with Trump a huge success
British Prime Minister Theresa May Friday declared her "sit down meeting" with newly elected US President Donald Trump to have been "a roaring success".
"He...
Tories to increase appeal to younger voters by disbanding
The Conservative Party have announced they intend to disband after this years party conference in Manchester.
Political analyst Ecgbert Wonk said, "The last election showed...
“Go Back to where you came from!” -Say 1970’s
In a shock statement today the 1970's have told 2016 to go back to its own timeline where it belongs.
In July a third of...
Paul Golding’s Prison-a-thon raises £5,000 for The Refugee Council
On an uncharacteristically serious note we'd like to thank each and every person who has donated or otherwise supported Paul's campaign for The Refugee Council.
David Davis-Brexit Speech in full
In a monumentous speech to the House of Commons yesterday, the Brexit Minister David Davis set out the government's plans for taking Britain out...
