Chuka Umunna banned from Coventry Laser Quest for crashing children’s parties
MP for Streatham, Chuka Umunna, has been forcibly removed from a branch of Laser Quest in Coventry for reportedly trying to join numerous children's...
Nuttall Calls Fraud On Stoke
Paul Nuttall, UKIP’s caretaker leader, has upset the Westminster apple cart by demanding a recount of votes in the Stoke by election.
“I want to...
Woman raising 10k for spirtual journey advised to drop acid and go to park...
Self-titled “spiritual healer,” “life coach,” and amateur YouTuber Rebecca Gronski has started a GoFundMe page to help support her travels across the world and take on...
Flying Arse Crashes Nose First
The longest aircraft in the world- the Airlander 10, nicknamed the flying bum- has crash landed in a field in Bedfordshire on it's second...
A blue passport is an integral part of being British, says bloke who’s never...
The great victory that is Brexit has delivered old-style blue passport covers to the grateful people. Rejoicing Brits across the country have been applying...
Nuttall lost close personal election in Stoke
Tragedy stricken leader of UKIP, Paul Nuttall (105), faced fresh disaster yesterday when he lost a close personal election in Stoke.
"Everything was looking good,...
Britain buoyed by approval of Autumn Olympics
There were wild scenes of celebration from keen athletics fans up and down the UK this morning, as the head of the Seasonal Olympics...
Theresa May to be replaced by heavy slow moving rain shower
“Rain shower means rain shower."
Particle physicists admit Hadron Collider has caused slow end of universe
It is 2 years since the upgrade and usage of the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider (RHIC) back in Feb 2014.
Concerns were raised by non-physicists...
Trump ecstatic hurricane Harvey is bigger than every hurricane under Obama
Donald Trump says he's especially proud that Hurricane Harvey is bigger than any Hurricane President Obama presided over.
In a speech he said, "Watched...
Corbyn ‘sells out’ in Stoke
Leader of the Labour Party, Jeremy Corbyn (27), has finally sold out in Stoke.
“Every single copy of my Big Issues has gone…”, said Corbyn....
Momentum members take comfort from prospect of cheaper ski holidays
Whenever election results don't go as hoped, there is always a chance that the downhearted will become the outright depressed. Fortunately, Momentum organiser Mia...
British tourist arrested in Frankfurt after tunnelling out of passport control and trying to...
A British tourist was detained by police in Frankfurt today after being arrested at Frankfurt train station.
The tourist is understood to have been queueing...
Jo Swinson to present new series of ‘Great British Railway Journeys’
The BBC has announced that Jo Swinson will replace Michael Portillo as host of the show, in much the same way as a smug...
Queue for pedalos during Dunkirk evacuation shorter than Benidorm immigration control confirm veterans
Eyewitness accounts given by proper British holidaymakers desperate to return to the UK reveal that queues for pedalos during the Dunkirk evacuation were shorter...
David Davis reveals he’s accidentally been attending PTA meetings in Brussels and has no...
There were refreshing bursts of honesty in the ritual Brexit update today when David Davis revealed he’s only just worked out he’s been attending...
