NewsThump

Rochdale IT Worker Deletes Human Rights Act

Albert Fudge, a Rochdale based web designer employed by the Conservative Party- has accidentally deleted the European Human Rights Act. The tech boffin was asked...

Matt Hancock adds Straw Clutching to his cv as “transferable skill”

0
Hot on the heels of Boris Johnson's success in the Stable Door Shutting championships, the Health Secratary, Matt Hancock has added Straw Clutching to...

Theresa May’s password ‘strongandstable’ easiest to guess say hackers

5
In the wake of the recent cyber-attacks on parliament, we have learned a lot. For starters, the reason Theresa May keeps saying “strong and...

Boris meant Saudis are awesome says Defence Secretary Michael Fallon

0
Boris Johnson’s words on Saudi Arabia and other Middle East powers were misreported, according to a clearly desperate Defence Secretary Sir Mr Michael of Fallon.

Rochdale man jailed for putting milk in tea before taking out teabag

0
A Rochdale man has been jailed for seven years for crimes against tea, it has been reported today. Steve Dickinson, 42 and a bit, was...
Roger Moore

Pope to make Roger Moore a saint…

0
In a surprise move, the Pope has announced plans to beatify Roger Moore, the popular actor who has very sadly passed away today. The Pope was...

‘Fake Sheikh’ Gets 15 Months For Making Obscene Phone Calls

0
Undercover Herald reporter Bazzer McNood has been sentenced to 15 months (suspended) plus a 20 hour Community Service Order for making lewd and obscene nuisance phone...

Petition to stop The Simpsons writing ‘Katie Hopkins becoming PrimeMinister’ episode reaches 65 million...

0
Creator of The Simpsons, Matt Groening, announced in an interview last week that he was planning an episode  in which human bile balloon, Katie...

Greta Thunberg releases Scandinavian Death Metal album.

0
The music world has been surprised by the release of an album by Greta Thunberg and the Prophets of Doom, a new death metal...
Ryanair

Jeremy Corbyn says Labour will Nationalise RyanAir

18
Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has layed out plans to take RyanAir into public ownership alongside the railways and the Royal Mail in a radical...
Farage

Farage and Woolfe hospital hand job scandal

0
Farage and Woolfe have been caught on film in anothe compromising position.

Brutus advises senators to get behind Caesar

19
Marcus Brutus has urged the Roman senate to show support for their leader Julius Caesar. Addressing the press at a conference outside the Senate, he...

Gove to juggle environment portfolio with rent boy role in Midnight Cowboy sequel

5
Michael Gove will juggle his new appointment as environment minister with a starring role in the long awaited sequel to 60s cult classic movie,...
Corbyn Elbow Patches

Jeremy Corbyn wins coveted Empty Suit award

0
Jeremy Corbyn has been awarded the prestigious Empty Suit award. The ceremony took place in London last night and as tradition dictates Mr Corbyn wasn't...
Kelvin Mackenzie South Yorkshire Police

Kelvin Mackenzie is a bellend says South Yorkshire Police

0
South Yorkshire Police have taken the bold move to publicly call the former editor of the The Sun, Kelvin Mackenzie a "complete bellend" over...

Posh twit in gilet loses both arms to frostbite

0
Henry Charles Chomlomoly has been telling us how he's lost both his arms whilst out sledging. Harry told us, "Cripes, got up this morning and...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts