Jeremy Clarkson’s views are irrelevant say other ageing xenophobic white people

0
Daily Express readers were quite literally fuming yesterday after tall gammon icon and keen casual racist Jeremy Clarkson referred to Brexit voters as 'coffin...

Britons to get easy sex after Brexit as the entire world lines up to...

21
Good news on the prospects with Brexit this afternoon as news broke that the entire world is lining up to provide easy sex for...

Special place in hell for people who put kisses on Facebook comments 

0
An ancient Biblical commandment that has been left out of Bibles and Torah for thousands of years has finally been translated.  Archeolinguist Barry Wordsworth told...
Pretentious Man

Pretentious local “hadn’t noticed” new Doctor Who Was female

0
In the UK we all know and love the kids TV show Doctor Who, because that's what we're told to do by the BBC....
Theresa May

You fucking asked for it vindictive Remain campaigner tells public after triggering Article 50

0
Theresa May has told the British public that "you fucking asked for it" at a press conference after formally triggering the process to leave...

Britain faces Sophie’s choice over which incompetent arsehole leads it

0
Britain has revealed it is spoiled for choice on which incompetent aresehole it has leading it. A spokesman told us, "Everyone is cheering at the...
Confusion

Labour less popular than Conservatives snap poll reveals

8
Labour voters up and down the country were dismayed to learn that, according to a poll of absolutely everybody with a vote in the...

Curse of the Railway Children Strikes Again as Deddie Davies Dies

0
The Curse of "The Railway Children" has struck again. The film made in 1970 told the tale of a group of children and a...

Britain happy to be America’s toilet after Brexit and doesn’t fear a blockage

0
Dr Liam Fox is in America this week offering the United Kingdom up as America’s toilet, after Brexit, and sees no risk of a...

May sets UK up for long March to Brexit

0
Theresa May’s Conservative government have quite literally meddled with time in their pursuit of successfully completing Brexit according to their timetable. The Conservative party used their parliamentary...

Orla Guerin to visit Rochdale

0
Residents of Rochdale were battening down the hatches and taking positions in bunkers as the Angel of Death Orla Guerin came to visit the...

Paul Nuttall denies lying about surviving the sinking of the Titanic

0
UKIP leader and MEP Paul Nuttall Sunday issued a stern denial that he had lied about surviving the sinking of the Titanic on April...

Join us this week for The Rochdale Herald’s guide to the best breakfast wines

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As the nation enters another three weeks of lockdown, The Rochdale Herald asks "Which alcohol is best for breakfast?" Coco Pops - RH recommends a...
Scientist

People with personalised number plates are knobs, according to latest research

Antisocial anthropologist Dr Alec Smartt revealed this astounding fact in his dissertation entitled "Discerning the class differentials in a post-modern classless society". Dr Smartt's...

Ken Livingstone backs down over Nazi Zionism claims

0
Ken Livingstone has backed down over his claims that Hitler and the Nazis once supported the cause of Zionism- the aim of establishing and...

Contractor used for Tory conference stage wins £2bn social housing contract.

30
The contractor used for the Tory conference stage set has been awarded a £2bn social housing contract. Brian Odget and Simon Carper, who have been...

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