Raheem Sterling to start giving guided tours of his tattoo’s
England footballer, Raheem Sterling has said he's going to start offering tours of his tattoos. Sterling made the announcement when he met members of...
Issue I keep reminding everyone of hurting my reputation, says Cliff
Cliff Richard, the long term bachelor and non-nonce, who our lawyers remind us isn't gay either, has been talking to the tabloid newspapers about...
New American National Anthem Unveiled As ‘Donald Donald Uber Alles’
The United States is getting a new national anthem, it has been announced. An executive order has been signed replacing the old anthem, The...
Nick Clegg announced to appear on I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here
After being metaphorically bludgeoned to death by his electorate, former MP and Liberal Democrats leader Nick Clegg has left politics with his reputation in...
Anglican bishop changes Facebook relationship status to – it’s complicated
Bishop of Grantham Nicholas Chamberlain this morning changed his Facebook relationship to: "it's complicated!" Although being in a relationship with a man he stresses...
Ralphs to go back to original pronunciation
Ralphs across the globe have collectively decided that they no longer like being called 'Raif'.
Ralph Johnson of Middleton said;
"Because Ralph Fiennes started calling himself...
Antarctical 50 signed, Bergxit means Bergxit
Today an area four times the size of London has broken away from the Antarctic landmass. It is a worrying example of rising sea...
Fresh sexism row after Hammond overheard telling Theresa May not to ‘worry her pretty...
Philip Hammond was today facing another storm over his casual sexism as it was revealed that his response to the Prime Minister's concerns over...
Corbo makes his ex Home Secretary
Jeremy Corbyn has appointed Diane Abbott as Home Secretary, placing her opposite Amber Rudd on the shadow front bench.
"We want someone who represents the...
I’m President of what? Asks Donald Trump
After the shock of winning the popularity contest "President Factor", President elect Trump has now talked about his next career move. We asked him...
Jeremy Corbyn appoints his teddy bears and security blanket to cabinet
The leader of the Labour Party Jeremy Corbyn has just had to give all his friends in the tree-house gang another reprimand. Having failed...
Britain First Dates
After the success of its restaurant based dating show, Channel 4 are set to do a one-off Xmas special to coincide with Paul Golding...
Government to solve doctor shortage by drafting in Job Centre assessors
Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt outlined plans today to "fill the doctor void" with medically untrained Job Centre staff.
The move has come under heavy criticism...
Bradley Walsh cast on Doctor Who to tackle underrepresentation of middle aged white men
Popular presenter of ITV’s The Chase, Bradley Walsh, has been announced today as a new companion in long running BBC sci-fi show, Doctor Who.
The...
Its not Lupus.
Hypochondriacs around the UK were said to be giddy with the excitement at the prospect of a new NHS website that will encourage them...
Hillsborough survivors reassure families of Grenfell Tower victims that justice will be swift
Hillsborough a fine benchmark. Reports are reaching Herald HQ that Grenfell survivors paused on their way out of the tower to loot the dead. They...
