McVitie’s and Walkers crisps back plans to decriminalise cannabis
Mcvities and Walkers crisps have allegedly got behind a backbench revolt to decriminalise cannabis.
Plans are already being made to reclassify cannabis from a class...
Pippa, Middleton, Topless Bikini Photo Scandal
Pippa, from Middleton near Rochdale, was said to be bemused today after seeing photos of a topless bikini advertised for sale in Rochdale's premier...
Kentucky Fried Chicken unaffected by chicken shortage, thousands of cats reported missing
KFC has opened more of its outlets in the UK despite running completely out of chicken.
Tories relying on the elderly to forget about the Dementia Tax to win election
After announcing their proposal for elderly social care, Theresa May and the Conservative Party went down in the polls harder than an OAP slipping on an...
Scientists name new species of pot-bellied pig after Paul Golding
Hot on the heels of naming a new species of shrimp after wall breaking rockers Pink Floyd, zoologists have named a newly discovered sub-species...
Andy Murray’s Mum still won’t let him quit tennis club
The Rochdale Herald has discovered that Andy Murray's Mum still won't let him quit tennis club.
"She promised me that if I won Wimbledon I...
EU to force UK to use £ s d following Brexit…
Brussels has warned that Britain will no longer be allowed to use the decimal system following Brexit and will be forced to go back...
CPS To Charge Corbyn With Electoral Fraud
Jeremy Corbyn is to be charged with electoral fraud by the CPS following reports that, although clearly unelectable, he has been winning elections since...
Thomas Cook passengers choosing ride share with refugees rather than Ryanair
Thomas Cook, one of the world's oldest travel providers has gone into liquidation, meaning thousands of job losses and over a hundred thousand holidays...
Definitely No Corruption at polls
Donald Trump has made a statement after his victory at the polls that he categorically believes there is no way there was any corruption...
Brexit means Brexit means Brexit means Brexit confirms EU Brexit negotiator
"It's taken us a week to work out just how clever you Brits are," said negotiator Hans Upp. "We thought it was just a...
World in shock after professional boxer wins boxing match against amateur boxer
The sporting world is in disarray this morning after an unbeaten professional boxer won a boxing match against a bloke who hadn't had a...
Giant Fish Finger and Lord Buckethead asked by Queen to prepare to govern
The Giant Fish Finger and Lord Buckethead have been asked by the Queen to prepare to govern Britain.
A spokesman for the Palace explained it...
Eating food causes cancer, says government scientist
This startling fact has now been scientifically proven and published in an official report. Restaurants will be forced to close after it was discovered...
God Ruins Bake Off
This week's edition of Great British Bake Off was ruined when God interfered during Gay Cake Week.
The contestants had been asked to make Fairy...
Media finally find someone who didn’t already think all professional cyclists were on drugs
Shocking news broke this week that not everyone in the UK considers professional cyclists to be routine drug users.
Other media outlets this week revealed...
