Two Rochdale pigeons have tonight, for the fourth night in a row, spent 45 minutes teaching Rochdale couple Stephen and Mary King the art of love.

The pigeons, who recently moved into a tree across from the King’s house have been watching the King’s each evening this week. Pigeon Hannah Roberts told the Herald, “Each night they come in, Mary sits on her phone or watching Netflix and Stephen just sits on a tablet. They have a 10 minute break where they sit and eat in silence then go back in front of the TV until they go to bed.”

Pigeon Rick added,”We thought we’d show them the secrets to a successful relationship. First we sat on the windowsill running up and down and playfully knocking each other off. Then I went, uprooted a worm and regurgitated it into Hannah’s mouth. Later on we made glorious love for 40 seconds in front of them then I flew off to a tree whilst Mary pecked at a day old dead rat.”

Hannah told the Herald, “We’ve done this everynight this week but it never makes any difference. They just sit on their phones not talking. We may have to poo on their car to get them out of the flat and doing stuff together.”

Meanwhile Mary King was not impressed telling the Herald “Every night this week they’ve been at it. Initially Stephen tried to get a pest controller out to sort them but the council can’t come round for a week. I’ve found some anti-pigeon spikes that we’ll put up this weekend. That’ll show them.”