Man who once burnt a Pot Noodle looking forward to another night of shouting...

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A man whose cooking skills don't extend beyond pressing the 'start' button on his microwave is looking forward to another night of shouting at...

Barrack’s is at least three times bigger than Donald’s says Melania

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Melania Trump has sensationally revealed that Barrack Obama has a really big one, it is at least three times the size of Donald's. "Donald is...

OED to introduce new terms for despicable journalism

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Following some recent "newspaper" headlines, a source at the Oxford English Dictionary has revealed some new words to be introduced to accurately describe some...
Elderly couple

Daily Express forecasts two feet of dead pensioners will fall in Central London by...

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The Daily Express has warned readers that 20% of them will die this week because of the "Beast from the east". Pensioner, Stan Still said,...

Thickos more likely to believe any old bollocks scientists reveal

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Scientists at Rochdale Community university have discovered that thickos will believe pretty much anything they see on Facebook

Sign up to The Rochdale Herald Newsletter

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The technical gods at The Rochdale Herald have built a very special daily newsletter that goes out every day at 5pm by email. If you...

Universal Tax Credit not as funny as reductive jokes about benefit cuts complain satirists

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The National Union of Terrible Satirists, or NUTS, released a statement today complaining that it's almost impossible to make jokes about Universal Tax Credit because it's too bloody complicated.

Crystal Maze to return as literally no ideas left

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The Crystal Maze is set to return our screens, again; "The barrel has no bottom. There's nothing left to scrape anymore. This is it." Said...

Stop being puffs about the word gay Clarkson tells queers

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In the latest scandal to hit the trio of millionaire cold cut deniers, the runt of the litter, Richard Hammond caused controversy earlier this...

Gay Muslims for Christmas – supermarket turns up the inclusion to 11 with groundbreaking...

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Pray together, lay together Scottish supermarket retailer Laldy has long sought to be a market disrupter by bringing cheap, if slightly bizarre, product, combinations. This...

Further scandal as so called satirical page Southend News Network owners aren’t even Southern!

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In what is turning out to be a much dragged out saga of scandal after scandal from those jumped up meme thieves over at...
Idris Elba

Idris Elba to play Jeremy Corbyn in upcoming Cold War spy thriller

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Idris Elba is to be cast as Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn in a new spy thriller set during the height of The Cold War. The...

BBC Believes Last Labour Voter Now Extinct

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Naturalists have accused the BBC of poor science after it was revealed the broadcasting corporation believes there are no more Labour voters. The shock extinction...

Local Liberal Claims To Only Visit Daily Mail Website For The Tits And Ass

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Rochdale liberal Gerard Sutherland has told his wife that he only visits the Daily Mail website for the Z-list 'celebrity' tits and ass, and...

Editor of satirical Newspaper “not convinced” readers know what satire means

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The editor of a satirical newspaper was reported to have his head in his hands after 60,000 people read an article he'd written about...

Liberal elite should stop bullying Stalin says Daily Mail

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The Daily Mail has instructed its readers to avoid the film, The Death of Stalin. In an editorial piece the Mail said, "This film...

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