Court

Ginsters Sue Ginsters over Ginsters Name

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It has emerged that pastry-based, snack purveyors Ginsters have taken to the courts. They aim to prevent a social movement off-shoot from adopting their...

Bank Holiday Not Fucking  Long Enough Decide People 

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Bank Holidays are not long enough according to a multi-pound survey commissioned by The Rochdale Herald. "It's 2016 for Christ's sake! Normal weekends should be...
British Homeopath

Woman raising 10k for spirtual journey advised to drop acid and go to park...

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Self-titled “spiritual healer,” “life coach,” and amateur YouTuber Rebecca Gronski has started a GoFundMe page to help support her travels across the world and take on...
Blackpool

People who wanted our country back surprised to discover that it’s still here

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Eurosceptic holidaymakers are swapping Corfu for Cornwall, Lanzarote for Llandudno. British travel agents report that Brits are going to UK destinations they never knew...

Pensioners advised to burn BBC licence fee fines to keep warm this winter

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The government, breaking a manifesto promise, has facilitated the scrapping of the free TV license for over 75s from 2020. "My pension doesn't cover the...

Man considering buying his wife lingerie for Christmas almost certainly shouldn’t.

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Research has found that the average bloke considering buying his wife lingerie this Christmas should probably not. "For a start, most blokes buy scarlet nylon...

Restaurants that don’t use proper plates just twats, says everyone

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The growing trend for eateries to use ridiculous items to serve your food on is now becoming a serious issue as local pottery firm...

Activity holidays not holidays – survey finds

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A survey carried out by the Herald shows Britons are increasingly of the opinion that lying by a pool in the warm sun and...

Outrage as ban on Christmas turns out to be false

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People across the country have expressed outrage in response to the revelation that a ban on Christmas has been revealed to be false. An image...
fox cubs

Corbyn supports hunting with dogs repeal in Government manifesto

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Jeremy Corbyn has pledged to support the Conservative Party's promise to repeal the fox hunting ban. This appears to be the result of him mishearing...

Brexit Halloween Threat

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Preparations for the commercialisation of an ancient pagan tradition were thrown into disarray today when importers of Halloween costumes reported that due to poor...

Alleged assassin Alexander Petrov’s walking gear recommendations

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In an exclusive for The Rochdale Herald, alleged Russian agent and leading fitness industry consultant Alexander Petrov gives Herald readers his recommendations for walking...

Dogged Victory for Campaigners

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The city was jubilant this morning after the news that a lengthy battle to grant one of Rochdale's most popular locations the status as...

Vegan banned from Vegetarian Club when she says quinoa “tastes like chicken”

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Food plays a huge part in our lives, many of us enjoying it almost every day. Ever since rationing was no longer necessary in the...

Germany devoid of German Christmas markets

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German shoppers are disappointed that they have nowhere to buy lots of pointless tat in the run up to Christmas.  With every British town apparently...

Ovaltine and cats are the new clubbing

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Night clubbing has undergone a radical change in recent years. The club scene has had many different faces. From tea dances, jazz and the dancehall...

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