Rees Mogg

Jacob Rees-Mogg to be put out to stud

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Jacob Rees-Mogg MP is reported to be in the process of choosing a nice green field near to his family home at Wentworth Woodhouse...

Satire Is Officially Obsolete, Satirists Announce

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Satirists have officially announced that satire is no more, it has been confirmed. A spokesman on behalf of satirists, announced, "As of January 31st 2017,...

Britain mourns the loss of George Michael jokes – We look back at terrible...

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Britain is tonight coming to terms with the sudden loss of George Michael jokes and as a target for snide comments & toilet based humour.

Satirist suspects people just reading his headlines 

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An angry satirist is convinced that people are just reading the headlines of his articles and maybe the first sentence underneath. "Anything after that could...

Rochdale woman in Waitrose platitude tragedy

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A Rochdale woman was left devastated today after discovering that she will now be looking after her neighbour's children for the next three Sunday...

Neil Armstrong’s body to be exhumed and tested for moon dust

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President Donald Trump is understood to have ordered an investigation into whether or not the first moon landing ever happened on this day in...
Plain wooden coffin

Rochdale man takes own life after using the word “Stat”

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Local person and Rochdale Herald editor Quentin D.Fortesque has today ended the sad experiment that was his life, after an ill-advised use of the...

Six year old girl fears poisoning after finding new food mixed into her food

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Six year old Sally Parker, domestic overseer and student, has recoiled in horror fearing poisoning after the discovery of new food mixed into food...
Woman in Car

Woman admits she was more than a little turned on by badly executed handbrake...

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A Rochdale Woman has told the Herald how she found a man's poorly executed handbrake turn a huge turn on. Speaking exclusively to the Herald...

Unfortunately, Jimmy Carr survives breakthrough surgery

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With great regret, surgeons at Kings College London have released a statement confirming the successful operation to remove a rogue dog toy squeaker that...

Judgemental twat who starts every opinion with ‘I’m not being funny, but’ definitely is...

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A man who enjoys character assassinating every person he encounters and then tries to excuse himself of any malice by saying 'I'm not being...

Homeopaths to protest NHS cut with one person million man march

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Homeopaths are to warn Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt that he faces severe blowback from them if he does not reverse the cut to homeopathic...

New father awarded medal for empathy by comparing childbirth to having a tricky poo

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"My partner, Honeydew, was having an awful time squeezing little Clytemnestra out. It reminded me of a time I had ferocious constipation and needed half an hour to curl one out." He spread a little ketchup on his sausage.
Salt and Vinegar crisps

A word in your ear Mr Lineker

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I have a suggestion for Gary Lineker Maybe you should stop selling Salt & Vinegar If your boss still works with the devil Then tell them to...
Man laughing

Serious satirists no laughing matter

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150-times winner of the 12-monthly Rochdale Herald annual 'Best satirical news site, based in Rochdale', the Rochdale Herald, has recently left readers puzzled.   It...

Success of women’s sports teams coincides with an increase in cases of erectile dysfunction,...

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The NHS is struggling to keep up with the increase in male erectile dysfunction which appears to coincide with the success of female sporting...

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