Humour

Make your own Original Trumpkin! Have you ever wanted to scare the bejeezus out of your neighbours on Halloween? Finally you have you chance with The Rochdale Herald's original Trumpkin! Step 1. Download the following template and...

We just tell all the farmers growing baby cows to leave them alone to live as they did in the wild. They can all start mining slate. Any excess they have they can sell to the restaurants in their area for use as napkins and plates.

A man who enjoys character assassinating every person he encounters and then tries to excuse himself of any malice by saying 'I'm not being funny, but...' is definitely being funny, it has been confirmed. Friends...

Homeopaths are to warn Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt that he faces severe blowback from them if he does not reverse the cut to homeopathic therapies on the NHS. Mrs Lorem Minima, a homeopath who has...

In a dramatically uncharacteristic move Stephen Crabb, the former intern at  anti-equality fundamentalist Christian group CARE and employer of interns from the anti-equality fundamentalist Christian group CARE,  made a play for the leadership of...

150-times winner of the 12-monthly Rochdale Herald annual 'Best satirical news site, based in Rochdale', the Rochdale Herald, has recently left readers puzzled.   It is claimed that the Herald has taken to being serious...

Local person and Rochdale Herald editor Quentin D.Fortesque has today ended the sad experiment that was his life, after an ill-advised use of the word "stat" to colleagues. Fortesque, of unknown age, was holding an...

Six year old Sally Parker, domestic overseer and student, has recoiled in horror fearing poisoning after the discovery of new food mixed into food she thought safe through exhaustive and repeated experience. The incident occurred...

An angry satirist is convinced that people are just reading the headlines of his articles and maybe the first sentence underneath. "Anything after that could be any old bollocks and no one would notice." Said...

The NHS is struggling to keep up with the increase in male erectile dysfunction which appears to coincide with the success of female sporting teams on the national and international stage.  "Sometimes it's hard," says...

With great regret, surgeons at Kings College London have released a statement confirming the successful operation to remove a rogue dog toy squeaker that had been mysteriously lodged in Jimmy Carr's windpipe for years. One...

A Rochdale woman was left devastated today after discovering that she will now be looking after her neighbour's children for the next three Sunday mornings in a row. Sharon Smith from the Falinge area of...

A Rochdale Woman has told the Herald how she found a man's poorly executed handbrake turn a huge turn on. Speaking exclusively to the Herald she said, "I was stood at the bus stop when I...

President Donald Trump is understood to have ordered an investigation into whether or not the first moon landing ever happened on this day in 1969? Trump is rumoured to have long considered the moon landings...

Eyewitness accounts given by proper British holidaymakers desperate to return to the UK reveal that queues for pedalos during the Dunkirk evacuation were shorter than the immigration queues currently being suffered at Benidorm immigration...