Rochdale woman in Waitrose platitude tragedy

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A Rochdale woman was left devastated today after discovering that she will now be looking after her neighbour's children for the next three Sunday...

Satirist suspects people just reading his headlines 

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An angry satirist is convinced that people are just reading the headlines of his articles and maybe the first sentence underneath. "Anything after that could...
Dunkirk Queue

Queue for pedalos during Dunkirk evacuation shorter than Benidorm immigration control confirm veterans

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Eyewitness accounts given by proper British holidaymakers desperate to return to the UK reveal that queues for pedalos during the Dunkirk evacuation were shorter...
Woman in Car

Woman admits she was more than a little turned on by badly executed handbrake...

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A Rochdale Woman has told the Herald how she found a man's poorly executed handbrake turn a huge turn on. Speaking exclusively to the Herald...

Hipster MP demanding new laws be written on slate

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We just tell all the farmers growing baby cows to leave them alone to live as they did in the wild. They can all start mining slate. Any excess they have they can sell to the restaurants in their area for use as napkins and plates.
Salt and Vinegar crisps

A word in your ear Mr Lineker

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I have a suggestion for Gary Lineker Maybe you should stop selling Salt & Vinegar If your boss still works with the devil Then tell them to...

Satirists run out of ink

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Thousands of satirists across the UK and their tens of readers around the world face a crisis as the supplies of ink slowed to...

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