Music

A 'real music' fan from Rochdale has revealed plans to spend tonight sneering loudly at the Eurovision song contest. Martin Williams 42, told the Herald "Even though I've got a TV subscription with over 200 channels, Netflix...

Greta Thunberg has announced that complete environmental collapse will be worth it now that Coldplay have announced they will stop touring to help save the planet. Thunberg appeared on Friday in a brand new Range...

A source close to 80’s Norwegian heartthrob Morten Harket, of synthpop sensations A-ha, has confirmed that the housewives’ favourite was rushed to hospital last week following a blaze at the house in Oslo he...

In a move to hail his comeback, the king of hereditary Marxist dictators, Kim Young Un aka Fatboy Kim, has announced a rehashing of his old remix hit "Radioactivity". His latest bid to burn up...

A man from Rochdale has bought his nephew the gift of music for Christmas. Stan Still told us, "I've played in bands since I was 12 and think it's a great idea for kids to...

Ever since we first saw him, we at The Herald have loved the fabulous Randy Rainbow, but he's outdone himself this time. https://www.facebook.com/RandyRainbowOfficial/videos/1204378566330751 Keep up the great work Randy and we'll send you a free mug...

After the high profile withdrawals of many A-List celebrities, and the frankly embarrassing refusal of a string of tribute acts & pub singers, Donald Trump has turned to Dave's 80's Fun House Mobile Disco...

Greta Thunberg has won Time magazine's Person of the Year for her work in stopping Coldplay from touring. Thunberg said, "All of my life there has been this elephant in the room. Something nobody wants...

In a landmark case the popular American rock band The Eagles are being sued by a flock of birds for use of the band's name. The Eagles, who won a Grammy for their album Hotel...

With thanks (and muted apologies) to Simon & Garfunkel But Islam's not a race, they screamed into his brown face And here's to you Tommy Robinson Mohammad loves you more than you will know Whoa,...

Regular visitors to Hampsted Heath have been informed all glory holes will be closed from tomorrow as a mark of respect to George Michael. A mass of floral tribute has already began to appear outside...

Rumours are rife about the quite tall, big-faced singing star after he has "fessed up" to not dancing on ceilings. The 80's porkie-pie uttering singer has told reporters "Look, i just made it up...

Standing on the Pyramid stage at Glastonbury, Jeremy Corbyn had a Eureka moment. "If all these bloody people can afford to come here at these prices they must all be bloody rich as Croesus.  Let's...

Ed Sheeran - like him or dislike him, it seems that nobody has particularly strong feelings about him either way, it would appear. At a recent gig in London, ticket holders were photographed en masse...

Ed Sheeran was clearly chuffed to receive his MBE for services to blandness, remarking, "I really don't know what to say, but it's a great honour." Sheeran has had a string of hits, although even his...

Batshit crazy US rapper Kanye West has said that the Stevie Wonder’s blindness may be a “choice.”