Man has bought a really big telly and wants to tell you about it
A man has bought a rather large and very expensive television today.
It apparently takes up quite a significant part of his living room and...
People angry about Hillsborough weren’t even victims
Like a crowd of Paul Nuttalls, they press forward into the comments section, STOP, STOP writing right there.
“The timing is appalling, how dare you...
Local hero returns from stay in hotel with both his iPhone charger and toothbrush
A local man is being hailed as some sort of hero after managing to return home from a stay in a hotel with both...
Homeworkers mysteriously suntanned
People who work from home are all looking oddly suntanned for people who work at their desks for eight hours a day, leading experts...
Rees-Mogg puts his clock back 200 years
Jacob Rees-Mogg has, today woken up in 1818 after instructing his Valet to put his clock back 200 years.
His Butler, Riff Raff told us,...
Catlike powers wasted on cats
According to research at the institute of institutes catlike powers are absolutely wasted on cats.
Researchers have discovered that despite having incredible superpower like abilities...
Roller coaster that maimed young people perfect metaphor for Brexit says The Sun
The Sun "Newspaper" has chosen to symbolise Brexit using a picture of the Alton Towers roller coaster, The Smiler.
One reader commented, "It's strange that...
Tommy Robinson hired to advise UKIP members on starting grooming gangs.
UKIP members are cock-a-hoop at the news that leader Gerald Batman has engaged the services of Tommy Robinson to advise on grooming gangs.
"This is...
Remote Scottish regions report shortages of wicker.
Reports are reaching us of shortages of some unexpected commodities in rural Scotland.
This follows human slug, Rod Liddle's advice in Der Spectator that people...
Boris Johnson promises £350M a week to the recovery of the British Virgin Islands
Boris Johnson, United Kingdom Foreign Secretary and all round honest broker, took the airwaves via the Today programme this morning to promise the UK...
Builder finishes job on time and under budget
A small building firm in Lancashire has become the first builder in the history of the industry to finish a job on time and...
Man who thinks caging children is a good idea says Brexit will be great
A man who thinks that separating children from their parents and putting them in a cage is a good idea has said that the...
Stonehenge to be knocked down to make way for new Super-Mosque
Details leaked from an article due to be published in the Daily Mail show plans to bulldoze the famous neolithic landmark to make way...
Beggars fined for begging to pay begging fines
Vulnerable homeless people are now being forced into longer begging hours to pay the newly introduced fines for begging.
In another PR triumph for...
Chaos at Speakers’ Corner after steaming pile of dog excrement is mistaken for Tommy...
There were scenes of chaos at Speakers' Corner earlier today after a steaming pile of dog shit was apparently mistaken for EDL-founder Tommy Robinson.
It is understood that the moldering heap of crap, which...
Man who said homeopathy should be available on the NHS attends first chemistry lesson
The man who said that Homeopathy should have a place on the NHS as it compliments science based medicine as they both come from...
