If it wasn’t for my £4m house and investment portfolio I’d be practically penniless,...
Nigel Farage, the former leader of Ukip, has told The Rochdale Herald that if it wasn't for his £4M house, his £2.5M investment portfolio...
Conservative Party campaign back on track after nobody resigns over rape or racism allegations...
The Tory Party is today celebrating getting its election campaign back on track after it managed to go a full half an hour without...
Iain Duncan Smith ‘devastated’ he may have to wait six weeks for knighthood
Iain Duncan Smith, MP for Chingford and Woodford Green, says strict investiture rules mean he could be forced to wait as long as six...
Irony strikes as Dogs Die In Hot Cars die in hot car
Tragedy has struck Burnley this afternoon after the Scottish band from St Andrew's accidentally locked in their tour Mondeo and died from heat exhaustion.
With...
Donald Trump declares Buckingham Palace ‘shit hole’ and offers to pay for repairs.
After a petition to stop the orange Hitler visiting the Queen passed 1.7 million signatures, the tyrannical dictator offered to meet the new President...
G4S wins plum contract to monitor domestic waste disposal inside homes
David David MP, the Minister for Local Government was forced into the public gaze today to confirm that G4S has been awarded the coveted...
Storm Eleanor wreaks havoc after gate left open on wind farm
Met Office issues "risk to life" warnings with wind speeds over 80mph expected overnight.
It has been revealed that Storm Eleanor, the latest storm to...
Restored Big Ben tests bong to ensure it’s ready for Eid
Eid al-Fitr is an important religious holiday that marks the end of Ramadan, London's most popular holy month
Ramadan is the ninth month of London's...
North East has nowt to do with us, claims Government
Following a cabinet meeting on Tuesday the government has denied responsibility for the north east stating "we didn't want it in the first place....
Blitz Spirit redefined to mean allowing a foreign Government to choose your ambassador
The Oxford English Dictionary has announced that it is redefining the meaning of Blitz Spirit. The move comes a day after the British Government...
Oxford English Dictionary finally defines ‘Brexit’
Brexit means Brexit… says Mrs T. May of Downing Street. Her assertion has prompted many people to ask exactly what ‘Brexit’ means. Answers have so far...
Mensa exam to be replaced by attempting to sync iTunes
International high IQ club Mensa has announced plans to scrap their famously difficult entrance exam, and replace it with a quest to negotiate Apple's...
British retail workers thrilled about opportunity to sign on using blue passport
British retail workers have revealed that they're looking forward to signing on with blue passports.
Cliff Edge told us, "Not having a job or any...
RSPCA urges pet owners to at least season with salt and pepper before leaving...
In the current heat wave the RSPCA has urged pet owners to undertake special precautionary measures when traveling with their furry friends this bank...
Man left alone for the weekend yet to put his trousers on
A man who’s wife has gone away for the weekend is yet to put his trousers on The Rochdale Herald has learned.
Thomas Thomas of...
Northerner goes full day without talking about the weather
Storm Eleanor has battered the United Kingdom with wind of up to 100 miles power hour, damaging property, trees and causing storm risk warnings...
