Walking Holiday

Swiss banks confirm Theresa May’s walking holiday was great for business

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"Normally we only get foreign potentates, third world dictators, drug magnates and the odd closet Nazi holidaying here," said Herman Gnom, spokesman for Zurich's Lavamatbank explaining that footage of a genuine prime minister - even one with no majority, no mandate and about to be deposed by her own party has been a huge boost for Swiss banks' credibility.

New Carling advert just footage of Wayne Rooney trying to remember driving home

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A new advertising campaign for Carling beer will allegedly feature Wayne Rooney trying to remember driving home. The campaign has come in for criticism from...
Corbyn

Corbyn announces Semitic Security Divisions to combat antisemitism

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Jeremy Corbyn has found himself in a new antisemitism row. The row started following Mr Corbyn's announcement of the formation of Labour Party SS...
Satire Aid

The Big Fat Secret Santa – Satire Aid 2018

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You may remember that last year we partnered with some other brilliant satirists to run a Secret Santa for underprivileged children. Well it really, really...
Nuclear explosion

A year in review because I don’t know if we’ll still be here in...

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If there is a god then 2016 is his version of an April fools day prank. Long gone are the days of plagues of...

Police chiefs launch captive breeding programme in bid to boost officer numbers

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Police chiefs in England and Wales have been asked to contribute their best and brightest officers to a captive breeding programme due to be launched in...

Santa Claus Denied Visa to Enter UK

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The Herald has discovered that father Christmas has been denied a visa to enter the UK on Christmas Eve, amid fears he may decide...

Lockheed Martin Trident Vote after party “off the hook”

Details are sketchy at present but apparently the Lockheed Martin Trident Vote after party was absolutely "off the hook". We can only imagine what kind...
Theresa May

Theresa May refuses to attend the General Election

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After appointing her recently bereaved Home Secretary, Amber Rudd, to take flack from 'the most left wing audience since a Stalin rally' - Daily Mail, in...
Michael Gove

Gove cast as Tick-Tock in Rupert Murdoch’s adaption of ‘Peter Pan’

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An all star cast is to appear in seasoned stage director Rupert Murdoch's new adaptation of the J. M. Barrie classic 'Peter Pan'. Michael Gove...

McVitie’s and Walkers crisps back plans to decriminalise cannabis

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Mcvities and Walkers crisps have allegedly got behind a backbench revolt to decriminalise cannabis. Plans are already being made to reclassify cannabis from a class...

Scottish islanders prepare to offer counselling to Londoners who lose wheelie bins in Storm...

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As Storm Brian barrels towards the UK with increasing media fury Scottish islanders are preparing to offer counselling to Londoners, and other bewildered southerners,...

Burnley residents “Delighted” by the introduction of BBC2 in the area

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BBC2 finally came to Burnley yesterday. The TV channel, which first aired to the british public in 1967, finally made its first transmition to...

Praise for latest ‘uncomfortable’ experience as Ryanair continue Doctor Who themed flights

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Ryanair CEO, and Doctor Who Super Fan, Michael O'Leary reaffirms airline's commitment to the BBC series Budget airline Ryanair continues to work round the BBC...

Cost of posting a letter first class rises to both legs below the knee

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The rises in the cost of posting your mum's birthday card using The Royal Mail have now come into effect. A first-class stamp will now...

GBBO causes football fracas

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It has been revealed that last night's violence at the London stadium was caused when West Ham fans chanted the name of the Bake...

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