Thousands Face Having to go to Work as RMT Calls for Driver Walk-In

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Hundreds of thousands of rail passengers face actually going to work as the RMT told Southern Rail employees to actually do their jobs. Staff will...

Anti-peerage remoaner experiences Damascene Conversion on House of Lords

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Longtime liberal anti-peerage system remoaner Steve Dickinson has experienced a miraculous Road to Damascus Moment.  For years local libtard Steve Dickinson has posted memes about...
Boris Johnson

Boris’ Barney buggering off says barber

In a hair raising exclusive, The Rochdale Herald has discovered the secret to the frankly unhinged character of the Foreign Secretary, Boris Johnson is...

14000 airbus job losses and 3.8 million settled migrants was on the other bus...

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Brexiteers have been scrambling around attempting to tell everyone that 14,000 job losses at Airbus and 3.8 million settled migrants was on a completely...
Boris Johnson

For Fuck’s Sake, sighs Britain

The entire United Kingdom muttered "for fuck's sake" in unision yesterday afternoon after learning that Boris Johnson has been "elected: new Conservative leader and...
Sunshine

Cumbrian Man hospitalised after lethal exposure to Vitamin D

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The recent weather worries in Cumbria worsened this morning, after 12 minutes of unseasonable partial sunshine exposed a fell walker to lethal levels of...
Theresa May

You’re In Or You’re Out

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Casual racism is set to become a thing of the past under new Prime Minister Theresa May. Shoe-obsessed Theresa May has announced plans to eradicate...

Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters

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Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University's Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...
Man buying a wheel

I suppose we better start our Christmas shopping, say men

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Men all over the world are reluctantly conceding that now might be a good time to start their Christmas shopping. "If I start shopping at...

EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain

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The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...
Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson promises £350M a week to the recovery of the British Virgin Islands

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Boris Johnson, United Kingdom Foreign Secretary and all round honest broker, took the airwaves via the Today programme this morning to promise the UK...
MEGHAN AND PRINCE HARRY

FA cup cancelled due to Royal Wedding scheduling clash

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The Rochdale Herald has learned that the Football Association have taken the unprecedented step of cancelling the 2018 FA Cup final. The move comes after...
Tommy Robinson

Tommy Robinson disappointed Korean Barbeque wasn’t a book burning

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Tommy Robinson has been explaining his disappointment at attending what he thought would be aa Koran burning event that turned out to be a...

Convertible car owner not as smug after leaving the top down last night

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Sandra Numpton of Heywood has spent the last few days driving around in her convertible Mini Cooper, sun glasses on, hair in the wind,...
Corbyn

Corbyn announces Semitic Security Divisions to combat antisemitism

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Jeremy Corbyn has found himself in a new antisemitism row. The row started following Mr Corbyn's announcement of the formation of Labour Party SS...

Country that burns effigies of a Catholic annually upset by statue damage

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A country that in the year of our Lord 2020 still thinks burning Catholics is a family friendly November evening out, is upset by...

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