Interflora agent admits to killing Lady Di in deathbed confession shock
Alleged deathbed confession implicates both floral delivery service and royal family in assassination plot
In a shock announcement that has been doing the rounds on...
Vegans & Fruitarians to settle differences with pissing contest in Co-op car park
Long held tensions between Orthodox Vegans & followers of it's subsidiary Fruitarianism about which is the most ethical way of life finally came to...
David Davis-Brexit Speech in full
In a monumentous speech to the House of Commons yesterday, the Brexit Minister David Davis set out the government's plans for taking Britain out...
Woman who believes she is British Prime Minister found wandering in Japan
A woman who apparently believes she is the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom has been found wandering in Japan attempting to convince people...
Fears of bush fire on Saddleworth moor causing huge smoke cloud actually vaping Hipster
For three days smoke has filled the skies above north Manchester as Saddleworth moor has been seemingly ablaze, leaving North Manchester covered in a...
Great weather for ducks, confirm ducks
Ducks around the UK have confirmed that they are having a really lovely day and are enjoying the weather.
Speaking from the middle of a...
Christmas ruined after husband caught shagging secretary on Christmas Eve
Christmas is officially ruined after the managing director of a local advertising agency was caught by his wife bonking his secretary on Christmas Eve.
Father...
Remain scaremongering smells likes truthmongering admits Mark Carney following sniff test
Mark Carney, Governor of the Bank of England, the place where they invent money, has admitted that remain campaigners accused of scaremongering may actually...
Emergency services respond to man with spade in head
Ambulance crews were called to an address in Wigan this morning after a local man suffered head injuries.
The man's wife called 999 after her...
Bloke from the Student Loans Company still thinks they’re getting their money back
A delusional representative of the Student Loans Company has said that he is still optimistic that they might get some of the money back...
Get behind my nutters version of Brexit says Jacob Rees-Mogg
Jacob Rees-Mogg has attempted to counter accusations that he has no Brexit plan by unveiling one so fancifully insane a Texan jury wouldn't recommend...
This week already pissed off with itself and planning a holiday
Millions of Microsoft outlook users are about to receive an unexpected update in their calendars.
The Rochdale Herald has just received an email from an...
Man who forgot to take smartphone to loo with him makes full recovery
A bloke who forgot to take his iPhone to the toilet with him this morning has made a “complete” recovery following “breakthrough” treatment with...
CRISIS as supermarkets RUN OUT of fancy tonic forcing MIDDLE CLASS to drink OWN...
The sunny weather forecast for the bank holiday weekend has led to panic buying of certain summer essentials. There have been reports of chronic...
UK appoints man that burnt 5G mast down to plan lockdown lifting
The UK Government has announced that it has appointed a new 'Lockdown Czar' to lead plans to lift the lockdown. Bill Board from Rochdale...
Man spotted not wearing his ‘Big Coat’ in Rochdale, in June
In scenes that shocked many shoppers in Rochdale town centre today, two men who were visiting from far away Bolton, were seen walking through...
