Emergency services respond to man with spade in head
Ambulance crews were called to an address in Wigan this morning after a local man suffered head injuries.
The man's wife called 999 after her...
New phrase ‘Wankers Dozen’ defined as ‘Britain First meeting’
The Rochdale to English Dictionary today confirmed it would be adding the colloquial phrase 'wankers dozen' to their 2019 edition. The R.E.D.'s official definition...
Women overcome by raw sexuality of man undercooking chicken on BBQ
Emergency services were called to a barbecue at a property in northern Lancashire this afternoon after dozens of women came over "a bit funny"...
Dead whale found in Thames was Russian spy
The Government have announced that a whale that has been found dead beside the River Thames was a Russian spy.
The whale was found beside...
Returning jihadis to be given free roast dinner at BUCKINGHAM PALACE
Britons who travelled to Syria to fight for the so-called Islamic State will be welcomed back into the country with a FREE roast dinner...
Scientists confirm that builder’s tea is just tea
A team of scientists from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that builder's tea is, in fact, just tea.
Clarence Tetley,...
Fears 40% of millenials may never have tedious home improvement conversations
There are fears that up to 40% of millennials may never be able to have tedious home improvement conversations.
Fewer and fewer people are able...
Nation tries to remember why it told kids to knock on strangers’ doors for...
Did we just adjust the clocks so that it is dark by the time kids come home from school, and then teach them to...
Theresa May announces Leyland Daf to build next generation Brexit-fighter in Preston
Theresa May has announced that the UK will be leaving the Eurofighter Programme immediately. BAE Systems will be closing its Eurofighter factory in the...
Army of White Walkers causing delays M1 Southbound
Drivers and commuters are facing another difficult day of delays and difficult journeys across the UK after a second night of freezing temperatures.
The Met...
Muppet fury over South West Trains slur
Muppets across Britain are furious today after learning that the name of their species was used as a slur to describe vandals by an...
Anaconda, Bresciola and Carpet Top 3 Girls’ Names for 2016
The computer that produces the list of the most popular names given to babies each year has thrown up a remarkable result in its...
Racist black cop shoots mentally unstable white veteran, says Fox News
Fox News has accused the LA Police Department of institutional racism after a black cop shot a mentally unstable white veteran on the steps...
Windsor council workers sledging to work on frozen homeless people
Councillors in Windsor have been seen sledging using the frozen bodies of homeless people.
One told us, "The council wanted them all removed for the...
Anne Frank’s diary found to contain script for pilot episode of Mrs Brown’s Boys
The wartime diary of Anne Frank has been found to contain a script for the pilot episode of Mrs. Brown's Boys.
Recent imaging analysis of...
Teabag enters second month on little plate by kettle
A teabag is currently entering its second month of lying in state on a little plate by the kettle in the kitchen.
Barbara Dickinson of...
