Prince Harry condemned for turning up to fancy dress party dressed as Paul Hollywood

0
The world had thought that William's half-brother and something-or-other in line to the throne's days of causing controversy were over. But today, a new...

Lexicographers confirm Jeremy Hunt now officially rhyming slang for idiot.

0
Those remarkably eloquent phonetician's over at WANCOff (The Wordsmiths, Arithmeticians and Number Crunchers Office) have enjoyed the last few years of Conservative Government. Over this...

Parent’s snow day ruined by children’s snow day

0
Not content with generally ruining your life, kids on snow days are one whinge away from being buried under that patio. Parent and washed...
Purse

Wonga to rebrand as Universal Credit Day Loans

0
The Autumn Budget 2017 announced changes to Universal Credit, merging the government's flagship benefits payment scheme with short-term high-cost credit provider Wonga. Mr B.Starde a...

Boris Johnson discovers he’s won half a speedboat at Chequers

0
Boris Johnson, Michael Gove and David Davis have won half a speedboat at the Conservative Party away day at Chequers today. The trio were...
Christmas Children

Only 3,617 parliamentary sex scandals until Christmas

The United Kingdom was very giddy to learn today that there are just 3,617 parliamentary sex scandals left to be revealed before Christmas. Santa Claus...

Roller coaster that maimed young people perfect metaphor for Brexit says The Sun

0
The Sun "Newspaper" has chosen to symbolise Brexit using a picture of the Alton Towers roller coaster, The Smiler. One reader commented, "It's strange that...
Tommy Robinson

Tommy Robinson hired to advise UKIP members on starting grooming gangs.

0
UKIP members are cock-a-hoop at the news that leader Gerald Batman has engaged the services of Tommy Robinson to advise on grooming gangs. "This is...

Tory Party pledges to attack pot holes now it has defeated the disabled

0
The Tory Party has declared victory in its war against the disabled and announced it will re-deploy its resources in a war on pot...
Builder

Builder finishes job on time and under budget

A small building firm in Lancashire has become the first builder in the history of the industry to finish a job on time and...
Homeless

Every doorway to get free homeless person, pledge Conservatives

0
The Tory Party has pledged that every doorway in Britain will get a free homeless person by 2021. A spokesman told us, "The Tory Party...
Sturgeon

‘It’s the Welsh we hate not the English’ claims SNP

0
The Scottish National Party has released an official statement denying that their desire for Scottish independence is motivated by a historic mistrust of the...

Praise for latest ‘uncomfortable’ experience as Ryanair continue Doctor Who themed flights

0
Ryanair CEO, and Doctor Who Super Fan, Michael O'Leary reaffirms airline's commitment to the BBC series Budget airline Ryanair continues to work round the BBC...
Man Relaxing

Man’s life improves after running out of fucks to give

16
The life of a Rochdale man has improved immeasurably after he finally ran out of fucks to give. Office manager James Harding, 38, ran...
UK Police

Concerns mount for Rochdale man not heard yelling at Six O’clock News

Concerns are mounting over the welfare of a Rochdale man who is apparently missing from his Lancashire home. Steve Dickinson, 42 and a bit, was...
Unhappy Child

Scotland to ban Smack for children

0
The Scottish government has confirmed that children will no longer be able to use Smack in Scotland. The move would make the country the first...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts