The vote leave campaign have today received a stern glare and a verbal ticking off for cheating at the village fete tombola.

It turns out they bought one ticket, pulled every ticket out of the barrel and chose the ticket corresponding with the bottle of blended whiskey and put the rest back in.

The old dear running the stall gave them a stern glare and accused them of cheating to which vote leave responded “we won, get over it” and “suck it up buttercup.”

We reached it to the vicar for comment but he was busy praying to a fictional omnipresent deity.

Dermot writes all of his articles in mixed media (mostly crayons and drool) he finds this style most fits his journalistic style, these are then sent to a room with 100 monkeys at typewriters, eventually something is published.